Page 245 of Second Sets Omnibus
My brothers and I look around, sweaty and smiling, staring at the adoring crowd as they cheer so loud it sounds like the roof is about to collapse. Not only did we receive the gold microphone as a trophy. We also received a one-million-dollar paycheck and a giant ass record deal.
This can’t be fucking real. I pinch myself with a shuddering breath. Nope. I’m not fucking dreaming.
Our dreams are finally coming to life after so fucking long of hoping and praying for a break.
The work will be hard. So fucking hard. This is what we’ve always wanted. Right? This is everything we’ve worked for. Everything we’ve talked about in Callum’s basement with stars in our eyes and determination in our guts. It’s fucking everything…
So why do I feel so goddamn empty?
As we walk off the stage, shaking hands with everybody who came out to see the contest, something breaks inside me. With desperation, I look around with longing deep in my soul, hoping to see the familiar girl with moss-green eyes smiling in our direction. I ache to see her pushing through the crowd with excitement thrumming through her veins, shouting congratulations in our faces. She’d jump in my arms, wrap her gorgeous, long legs around my torso and fervently kiss my lips. Without hesitation, she’d jump to Callum, Rad, and then Kieran, pouncing on them happily.
My heart cracks when we finally walk into the night air, whooping and hollering—all but me. I hang back as they jump up and down around our SUV, cackling and singing our praises. They don’t notice when I shove my hands in my jeans and slowly walk away from the commotion. They don’t see me when I slump against the club, crying out in frustration. Or the tears glistening down my cheeks under the glow of the light post. No. They don’t seem to notice anything but our win.
“I’m so fucking sorry, Little Brat,” I mumble with a quivering voice. Leaning my head against the scratchy brick, I glare at the twinkling stars, not drowned out by the city’s lights. “I’m so fucking sorry I ran away from you.” There’s nothing I can do about it now. I’ll keep pushing forward with her on my mind. I’ll never forget what I did, the sacrifices I made to get us away from Nigel and Gloria.
As the guys continue their loud celebration across the parking lot, my mind wanders, concocting wild ideas to easethe shame of what I’ve done. As the night goes on and the celebration gets bigger, I realize there is something I can do for River to ease the pain of our departure.
“Yeah, it’s stuck in the parking lot of the Dead End bar in Central City,” I say, silently pacing my room at 8:00 a.m. the following day. The boys are still sound asleep after a wild night out, drinking anything they could get their hands on. So, as soon as they passed out, I researched the best shops in Central Illinois hoping to get River’s car in.
“Yeah, sure, Asher. I can pick that up today. If you want me to take it to the shop?” he questions gruffly through the phone.
“Uh...yeah, Man, just to fix whatever is wrong with it. Just send me the bill or whatever you need me to do.” I rub my temples as a headache forms, pounding against my skull.
Fuck. I didn’t even drink that much last night. Not with the way I felt. I couldn’t touch more than two drinks without wanting to throw up.
“No problem, man. I’ll get it taken care of and send you updates. Anything else?” he asks as I plop into bed and lay back, staring at the dull white ceiling.
“Fix it. Clean it. And then send me everything. But make sure you put it back where you got it from; I’ll be in town in about a week to pay.”
“Sounds good. I’ll see you when you get into town.”
“I just wanted her to have a way to get around,” I say softly, chuckling when I remember the note I left on her windshield.
Stop fucking walking.
As I stand in the empty parking lot of Dead End at 3:00 a.m., an emptiness engulfs my entire being. My stomach churns, sending acid up my throat as I set the note beneath the windshield of her car. I don’t have a clue when she’ll come back to it or even see this, but it’ll give me plenty of time to sneak away without being noticed. I swallow hard, staring at thepiece of shit she drives around. If I was a better man, I would buy her something new so she’s able to get to work and school without worry.
But I’m not a better man. I’m the piece of shit under her shoe. So, this is the best I can fucking do for now. Maybe in the future, when we’re in a better place as a band, I’ll tell them what happened.
“Mmm. She used it, too. Every day until her brothers came into her life. You fixed it up real good, son.” Reaching over, she lays a weary hand on my arm, gently squeezing. “You did a damn good thing for her.”
I scoff, shaking my head. “I would have been a better man if I could have just let things be and let her come. If I hadn’t meddled in our relationship and?—”
“Now, now,” Korrine chastises, squeezing my arm again before pulling away. “How many years have you put yourself through the wringer?” She raises a brow when I blow out a breath, willing the stupid tears to melt away.
“Since the moment I left,” I mumble.
“And she knows it?” she asks as we both take sips of tea. “You’ve explained and said your sorrys?”
“Of course.” I set my glass back down on the tiny table between us, staring at the miles of nothing again, getting lost in the blissful breeze and the sounds of insects. “I’ll say I’m sorry forever until I’m blue in the damn face and have bruises on my knees. Even if she forgives me, I’ll remember what I did and how it affected everyone. I don’t expect anyone in this situation to forgive me, though. I know I wouldn’t.”
“There’s a blessing with forgiveness. Humans never forget what happened but find it in their hearts to forgive, anyway. Some way, somehow, it happens. Not many people know, not even my own children, but the love of my life left me afterone year of marriage. Said he couldn’t do it anymore and disappeared for a week.”
“Why?” I ask, swallowing hard.
“Who knew with that man? We were young and in love, moving through this world at warp speed.” She shakes her head.
“He came back?”
