Page 38 of Rage & Paradise
Vado doesn’t reply, and I can see he’s trying to calculate his next move. Killing one of them now won’t do anything for us.
“We need to regroup. If Sina is working with the remaining Canos…” I let the words trail off.
When we set out, we thought we’d have to deal with a woman on a power trip. Now we have to figure out how to deal with a war we thought we ended years earlier.
“Remember what I said. Leave these people alone if you know what’s good for you.” Vado lets the man go before he turns on his heel and walks back to the main space of the house.
We all follow behind him, no more on edge than before. The threat has increased. My eyes scan the women in the room. None of them look like they are being forced to be there, but then again I wonder how much of what I’m seeing is nothing more than a show. The same way Estrella was trained, brainwashed, so were these women.
Before it’s all said and done, I want to make sure that everyone here and everyone else in Sina’s grasp knows they have a choice. They all deserve the choice, no matter what it costs me.
***
AZ, Lobo, and Vado have been locked up in church since we made our way back to the clubhouse.
We only just realized that the Canos were still around, but to know that they are helping to run an enterprise that victimizes children and other members of our community has raised this to a new level for all of us.
There’s no question about it now. It’s going to be a war. A bloody battle none of us were expecting.
I just need to get myself ready, need to prepare myself for what’s about to happen. On my own.
I’m in my room trying to center myself when I hear a knock on my door.
“Ven.” I call out and the door opens.
I groan when I see it’s Estrella. I figured it would be Pooh or someone else coming to give me more information. Not her.
“I was just coming to check up on you. See if you found out anything.” Her voice is soft as she makes her way further into my room.
“No.” I’m short with her, both because I don’t want her to be near me and also because just having her this close is doing things to me I know I can’t act on.
“Oro, are you going to tell me what I did wrong or are you just going to keep ignoring me?”
“You didn’t do anything wrong. I just don’t want to be bothered.” I don’t bother to look up at her. I don’t want her to see the deception in my eyes. I don’t want to see the fakeness in hers.
She turns on her heels like she’s about to walk out, but before she makes it to the door she turns back and rushes over to where I’m laying down.
I’m caught off guard when she smacks me hard on the chest. The sting of the smack vibrates in my body.
“Get up! You’re going to talk to me. I’m tired of walking on eggshells around you. Tired of trying to figure out what the problem is. Tell me what it is.”
I pop up from the bed and glare at her. “Don’t put your fucking hands on me. Didn’t Coca warn you about that shit? Hitting one of us is the easiest fucking way to get kicked out of here.”
“So do it! Rat me out. You’ve got your reason now. You want me gone so bad, here’s your chance.”
I shake my head and try to walk around her to get to the door so I can escort her out. “I’m not going to put you out. Just don’t put your hands on me.”
She slides in front of me so close that I have to back up.
“Now you don’t want me to put my hands on you? You wanted my hands on you yesterday, or at least you did for a second. What happened between then and now? What, did you realize just how fucked up I am? How damaged I am?”
“I told you about that shit before. There’s nothing wrong with you.” I don’t want to have this conversation. I don’t want to do this right now.
“Then what is the problem? I tried to help you. I did the best I could. When are you going to forgive me? I can’t live like this. I don’t know what you want me to do!” She yells at me and I can’t hold back.
“I want you to be real!” I yell back at her.
“Wh… what?” She stutters and I get right in her face.
