Page 66 of Played
I nod, impressed and shocked by his honesty. “Why did you get engaged to one then?”
“I was nineteen and trying to convince myself I was straight. It was a huge mistake. She got pregnant, and I was fucking terrified. But then she lost it, and as painful as that was for both of us, I also felt relieved. I realized I couldn’t live a lie my entire life. So I ended it. She was heartbroken, although I think that had more to do with the miscarriage than me. She married some guy a year later, and they have five kids now.”
I’d love to unpack the sorrow in his tone, but I get the sense it would be better not to push too far too fast. “I’m sorry about the baby,” I say.
He shrugs and takes another slug of his beer.
“And the other one?”
He frowns. “The other what?”
“The other relationship? You said there were two.”
His frown deepens. “You, Mase.” He says it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“You mean back in high school? That was serious for you?”
He pulls back, blinking rapidly. “It wasn’t for you?”
His tone is accusatory, and I’m pissed that I can’t stop tears from filling my eyes. “We were together for eighteen months.You were my first kiss, my first… everything. Of course it was fucking serious for me.”
His face clouds with confusion and sadness, and he shifts to his knees on the sofa and palms the back of my neck. “Every single thing I said to you after my dad found us was a lie. Everything before that was the truth. You have to know that.”
“But I never knew that, even though I told myself that it couldn’t possibly be true. I didn’t want to believe it so much that I convinced myself something awful must have happened to you. I was fool enough to hire a PI, and he found you a few weeks later, having pizza with some girl and living your best life in Idaho. And as relieved as I was that you were okay, I have never felt more worthless and insignificant in my entire life as I did at that moment. So, yeah, eventually I believed you meant every word of it, King.”
He shakes his head. “I hate that I made you feel that way. But I wasn’t living my best life. I was living a fucking lie.”
“You fucking broke me,” I croak.
He presses his forehead to mine. “I know, baby. And I’m so fucking sorry.”
I try to wrench from his grip, but he holds me tighter. Why the fuck did we have to dredge up these old hurts right when we got to a good place? “Mase, please listen to me,” he pleads. “I loved you then, and I never fucking stopped.”
He seems as shocked by his admission as I am. “Are you telling me you love me?” I ask.
He licks his bottom lip, his eyes never leaving mine, and I wait for what feels like an eternity for his answer. Because I want him to love me. I need him to. “Yeah, I am,” he finally says, his breath warm on my face. “You are the only person I have ever loved, Mason James. And I don’t see anything ever changing that.”
This is what I wanted to hear, but it scares the hell out of me. I still love him too, but he doesn’t get to know that. Not yet. Not when I can’t trust him not to run as soon as things get a little tough. Thankfully, he doesn’t wait for me to say it back. He presses his lips over mine, demanding a kiss that I readily give.
It doesn’t take long for us to find our way to his bed, naked and urgent. We paw at each other, grabbing, biting, sucking, and licking. Hands and mouths taking and giving as we devour the other. Before long, he has me pinned to the bed, one hand on the back of my neck, and he pushes his thick cock inside me.
Fuck, it burns even with all the lube, but it’s everything I need.
“Nobody has ever felt this good,” he says with a growl. It’s true for me too. I’ve had plenty of incredible sex over the past eighteen years, but it’s always been different with him. He rests most of his weight on top of me, his mouth pressed against my ear. “You’ve always belonged to me, and you always fucking will.”
“Yeah.” It’s supposed to be a challenge, but it comes out as a moan of agreement.
“Yeah.” He pulls out and sinks back inside me, causing white-hot pleasure to sear through every cell of my being. “You’re the only guy I’ve ever fucked bare, Mase. What will it take for you to trust me enough to do that again?”
Keep doing what you’re doing and you can fuck me any way you want. Fortunately, my brain kicks in before my dick can make me vocalize that response. “Prove you’re clean and we can talk,” I pant out.
His lips dust over my skin. “Good boy.”
Jesus fuck. “And I’ll do the same for you.”
“Of course you will.” He goes deeper, stimulating my prostate and making stars flicker behind my eyelids.
“I’m gonna fuck you again, King,” I moan.
