Page 30 of Playing With Fire
“Oryou leave her alone. Erase her from your heart and mind as an option. Completely shut this down and move on.You can’t be her life raft, Hud,” Jake says, slapping me on the back.
“And what was Dylan for you, hm? You were prepared to marry awomanuntil you found him. You parked your car in his fucking blind spot so he’d back in to you just so you couldtalkto him for fuck’s sake,” I say, starting to get angry.
“He wasn’t married,” Jake defends.
“But you were practically engaged to Cora!” I shout. Thankfully, the noise in the club makes my outburst barely audible to those around us.
Another two shots down.
“Look, all I’m saying, is if she’s really unhappy, you need to make sure she decides to leave becauseshewants to. Not because she thinks things with you will fix all of her problems. But I also think being honest about how you feel is fair. And for the record, I didn’t want to be with Cora from the start, Hud. I’m gay. Dylan just gave me the boost I needed to get out of a relationship I never should have been in to begin with. If Shannon loved her husband enough to marry him and have a child with him, then you don’t want to be the reason she leaves. Because there’s no guarantee it’ll work out with you, and the last thing you want is for her to implode her life only to resentyoufor it later.”
What he says makes sense, even if I don’t like it.
“I crave her, man. More than just physically,” I admit. “I’ve never felt anything like this.”
He squeezes my shoulder. “I’m the last one that’ll judge you, trust me. And if you say it’s something special, then I believe you. But consider it from a different angle.”
I look over at him with a brow raised, wondering what angle he’s suggesting because hell, I feel like I’ve been through them all already.
“Fires that burn with high airflow spike witha rush of energy and then burn out quickly. Are you sure it isn’t the forbidden you’re craving? The energy rush that comes from sneaking around? Because what will it look like when you’re raising someone else’s kid, coming home to an exhausted wife who gives you shit about the nights you spend at the fire station or out with us? Without that rush of energy, things have a tendency to burn out.”
Suddenly Knox’s face appears on the other side of Jake. “Lot of fuckin’ help you assholes are.”
Jake laughs. “Did you need help? Looked like you were handling her just fine.”
Knox punches Jake in the arm. “She kept calling meDaddy,” he snarls in disgust.
“Ow, dude,fuck. Do you forget how big you are from wielding hammers all day?” he whines while simultaneously laughing and rubbing his shoulder.
“Also,” I add, “you probably shouldnothave told us she called you that because I’m changing your name in my phone.”
“I will end you, Hudson Goddorah,” Knox says, jaw still clenched. Feeling bold from the shots, I reach in front of Jake and pat Knox’s cheek.
“I hope you do…Daddy.”
“Jesus Christ. I’m going home,” Knox declares, pushing his stool back.
“Stop being such a baby. Sit,” Jake commands.
Before I pound my last two shots, I place an order for Phoe’s nasty-ass beer when Jake holds up his own.
“To Shannon. May she choose the path that brings her the most happiness,” he toasts. It feels out of place in a club full of Gen-Zers dry humping each other, but Knox and I raise our glasses anyway.
I down my last two shots and decide to go looking for Phoe. Oddly, I wish I would’ve hung out with him alone tonightbecause he would have given me terrible advice and told me to just go for it, and honestly, that’s what I’m after right now.
I just wanted one of my friends to tell me to scale the tower wall, slay the dragon, and take the fucking princess for my own.
Assholes.
I leave Knox and Jake at the bar and make my way across the crowded dance floor, but pull up short when I see Dylan and Phoenix.
They arewaytoo close for comfort and Phoenix looks like he’s about ten seconds from busting a nut in his jeans. He has one hand in his hair, gripping his own roots like he’s trying to make sure that hand stays put instead of wandering across the body of our best friend’s husband. His other hand however, has already entered the Promised Land and is currently across Dylan’s stomach, holding Dylan against himself as Dylan’s ass makes tantalizing circles against Phoe’s crotch.
The biggest problem? These two disappeared before they started drinking so they can’t even blame their closeness on the alcohol.
They both have their eyes closed and I have to admit, they look damn good moving together to the beat of whatever dubstep is currently blasting through this place. I pause to watch, but only for a minute because if Jake comes looking for Dylan and finds them like this, it isn’t going to end well.
Stepping up to them, I pull Phoe’s hand off Dylan’s stomach and put his beer in it, which causes him to open his eyes.
