Page 3 of Marginally Yours
"Yeah, hey. I'm, uh, Devon. I'm here a lot, as you can tell. I, uh, went to school with Eddie," I mumble awkwardly, mentally kicking myself.Stop saying "uh", you dense motherfucker.This is not going as smoothly as I'd hoped. She’s squinting at my mouth, and I remember she’s not just listening but also reading my lips. I consider holding out a hand to shake but remind myself that this isn't a business deal and my palms are probably sweating, so I stick one in my pocket and point the other at the display for the book I just finished. I clear my throat and try again.
"I just finished that one last night. Have you read it?" My words come out with a little more confidence this time, and hopefully I’m loud enough for her to hear without struggling. I'm now standing at the proverbial fork in the conversational road.
The knots in my stomach loosen a bit when she nods emphatically and says, "Yes! I just finished it the other day. I loved it!" I can feel my shoulders loosen up, and I realize just how many muscles have been clenched as I release them. I hope she can't tell that I'm slowly melting back into a human being shaped puddle of anxiety.
"It was so good," I tell her, running my hand over my beard nervously. We chat about the book's pivotal ending for a few minutes. We both thought it was really great and agreed that it was left open for another book on purpose, even though nothing has been announced.
"Oh shit," I mutter, glancing at my watch. "I have to get going or I'm gonna be late for work." Her face falls just enough for me to clock it and I almost feel bad being excited about that.Almost.I decide that a few minutes won't kill me. "Hey, I need something to read tonight at work. Any suggestions?"
She lights up again, and I'm three seconds from calling off tonight. She lifts her clipboard a bit and pulls out a book, holding it out to me. I can tell it's an early 80's fantasy just by the cover. It's mostly lime green, with a big technicolor illustration of a dragon in the middle, a tiny rider perched on its back. I could have sworn that pile was all hardcovers, but this is an old paperback with worn edges.
"This series was always one of my favorites," she explains. "It's a little dated but the story is great. There are like 25 books in the series, too. It's a classic dragon fantasy, so I think you'll really like it." The last word is clipped, and she pinches her lips together like she's trying to make herself stop talking. She looks down at the floor. "I hope so, anyway," she adds quickly, quieter than before.
Holy shit. Is shenervous? To talk tome? There's no fucking way.
I wrap my hand around the book and wait for her to release it, but she's still holding on tight, staring at my hand. "I bet I will," I reassure her quietly, and then I remember thatshe can't fucking hear you, dumbass. So, I rustle up every ounce of audacity I own and gently touch the fingers that she has clamped around the book with my free hand. Just a light brush against the backs of her fingers, and that drags her attention back to me.
"Oh," she squeaks, letting go of the book.Great, too much."Ok, let's get you checked out so you're not late."Or maybe not?I can't tell, but she's still smiling while we get to the register.
I don't tell her that I'm already late at this point because I honestly couldn't care less, but I hurry behind her anyway.
"I'll start on this when I get to work," I tell her as she rings me up. "I'll let you know what I think next time I stop in, but I'm sure I'll like it if you do."
She beams at me and slips my receipt in the book beforehanding it over. I slide it under my arm and turn towards the door.
"See you later," she calls after me.
I make sure I turn to her before I speak this time. "Absolutely," I tell her with an awkward little wave that makes me want to cut my fucking hand off. Then she gives me the exact same wave back and I could probably get hit by a bus right now and die happy.
What the fuck is happening? I don't think I've ever been this nervous in my life. I mean, I haven't spent much of it talking to beautiful women who are into fantasy booksand possibly me, but still. My cheeks hurt from grinning like an idiot for the last 20 minutes. My palms are definitely sweaty, and I think I might be shaking a little bit.
That went... good. Like, really good. Most importantly, she was definitely just as anxious as I was, and I don't think it was in a bad way?
Oh, shit.Wasit in a bad way? I hope she wasn't just being nice to me because I was a customer, and she had to.She's not flirting with you, idiot. She's just hot and talking.Fuck. Next time I go in, I'll wait for her to talk to me. If she actually wants to, she'll ask me about the book.
I spend the drive to work replaying the entire interaction, analyzing her reactions and agonizing over whether I made her nervous or uncomfortable. I'm aware that there is a huge difference between the two, and I have absolutely no interest in making her uncomfortable.
I roll into work about ten minutes after my shift starts and apologize to John for making him stay late. He waves me off without a word and hustles off before his wife calls to chew him out. I sit at my desk with my new book. I'm still rolling our conversation around in my mind and self-flagellating over it when I open the book and the receipt slips out.
I think my eyes actually bulge out of my head when Inotice the 10 digits scribbled on the back in glittery purple ink. Underneath the number, she wrote "in case you finish the book early" with a little smiley face.
I don't know how long a human being can go without breathing, but I'm definitely setting a record.
I have no idea when she had the chance to write this. I must have been staring at her face so hard I didn't even notice her hands. What I do know is that she had to have done it after I touched her hand, which means I've been torturing myself for nothing. I can't even bring myself to be annoyed about it becauseholy shit, she gave me her number.
I save her number in my phone immediately but stop myself from texting her just yet. I need to read a little bit, and then I'll start the conversation with something to report. That feels like a solid plan.
Two hours later, I'm about 100 pages in and I'm invested. This is pretty good, honestly. I think I've read enough to give her an honest update, so I stick the receipt in the book to mark my page and pull out my phone.
Hey, it's Devon. I'm about a third of the way into this book and it's pretty good. Excellent suggestion, thank you!
Perfect. I set my phone down and go back to reading. I don't expect a response right away. She's probably still at-
My phone vibrates. It's been maybe 30 seconds. I don't think I've ever grabbed my phone so fast in my life.
Good, I'm glad you like it! Who's your favorite character so far?
Definitely the dragon.
