Page 32 of Gamers' Omega
For the first time, I actually wanted to tell an alpha why I was scared, rather than feeling badgered to talk about it.
“I… I’d like to talk about it,” I said softly. “I mean, if you want to hear.”
Beck shifted and lifted my chin so that our eyes met. “Are you sure? We can wait.”
I nodded. “It’s fast, but it feels right, too.”
Tony squeezed my thigh, and Ian reached across to take my hand.
“Only if you’re ready,” Freddie said.
“I think I am,” I replied.
“Then we’re here.”
“Thank you.”
I settled back on Beck’s chest and squeezed my eyes shut.
“My papa was a single parent,” I said after several seconds. “One omega with two kids: me, and my older sister—Danny.”
“Danny?” Tony asked.
“Short for Danielle.”
“Ah. Ok.”
I took a deep breath. “Danny hated me. Still does, I think, though I haven’t talked to her in years.”
“Why does she hate you?” Tony asked.
I shrugged. “Because I exist.” I paused. “She was already seven when I was born, and, from what I’ve been told, was Papa’s little princess. My relatives all said that Papa doted on her. He never had much money, but he made up for it with time. They were always doing things together.”
I curled my fingers into Beck’s shirt. “Then I came along. Nobody knows exactly what happened, and Papa never talked about it, but everybody seems to think that a heat partnerdecided to not use condoms. All I know is that the alpha dipped before I was born, and never paid any kind of support.”
“Do you know their name?” Freddie asked.
I shook my head. “Papa didn’t name them on my birth certificate.”
“I’m sorry,” Ian said.
I smiled. “It’s ok. Sometimes I wonder, but then I remind myself that I shouldn’t care about him if he didn’t care about me.”
“Is that why you’re scared?” Tony asked. “Are you worried that somebody will knock you up and leave?”
I thought about the question for a moment, then shook my head again. “I think every omega is scared of that in some way, probably female alphas too. But, no. It’s because of Danny.”
Beck started trailing his fingers up and down my back in a silent show of support.
I sighed and curled against him. “Some of my earliest memories are of my sister complaining about me, or being mad at me because Papa did what I wanted instead of what she wanted. Even for my birthdays, she’d find something to blame me for. One year it was about a chocolate cake when she wanted strawberry. It didn’t matter that it wasmybirthday, she didn’t want chocolate. Another year she complained to all her friends during her party that her birthday would have been so much better, except that Papa had to save money for mine, which was several months later.”
“Rude,” Tony stated.
“Yeah,” I agreed. “If she didn’t like something, she found a way to make it my fault. Papa always tried to shut her down. He’d punish her and do his best to reassure me, but she kept it up.”
I paused and took a deep breath before releasing it slowly. “It all took a darker turn when I was eight. I got sick and had to spend a few days in the hospital. They didn’t know what was wrong at first and did several body scans. That was when we found out I’m an omega, rather than when I presented. It turned out that I just had a virus with nasty symptoms, so I got fixed up quickly, but Danny had something new to torture me with: my own biology.
“By then I’d grown so accustomed to her little jabs about how she wished it were still just her and Papa that they barely registered. But as soon as she learned that I’m an omega…” I shuddered. “She said it was my punishment, that God made me an omega for coming between her and Papa. She also…” I swallowed. “She also told me that alphas would only want an omega like me for one thing: sex. And that because where… you know… it would hurt. A lot. Every time.”
