Page 82 of Vampires of Eden
Straightening, I take a breath. “I told Daniel about my situation—with Father’s seat on the board and my potential engagement to Lord Cherrington. Daniel was pretty upset about it—like everyone else, basically. Everyone except for my parents and Lord Cherrington.”
“YourPapänisn’t thrilled about this, either. But go on.”
I nod. “Right, true. Father has at least expressed some concern. So… Daniel talked to Leoni, and she called me and asked if I’d be interested in spending a couple weeks with them for the purpose of learning how to manage and operate the vineyard. If we all agree, I could join them in running it. This would potentially help to rebuild my dowry and give me a steady source of income.”
“Wow,” Raphael says, blinking his chestnut eyes. “That’s a generous offer.”
“Is it weird that I want to do it? Do you think it’s crazy?”
I’m excited about this prospect. The situation would be a sharp contrast compared with my life up to this point. Even still, I think I can handle it. I want to try.
“It’s sudden, for sure,” Raphael surmises. “Not crazy. In fact… I think this could be an excellent move for you. Sucks for me, though. Since I’ll be cleaning up cat poop for two more weeks.”
“Sorry.”
“But I think it’s exactly what you need—in more ways than one.”
My smile drops and I narrow my eyes, suddenly suspicious. “What does that mean?”
“Don’t you feel like you’re in a rut?” he asks. “Lord Cherrington aside, don’t you think you’re ready for something new? A change of pace. You’ve been bored of these stuffy, formal events and this rigorous schedule for a long time, Lexie. You were looking forward to escaping some of it once your bonding ceremony was over, remember?”
“Yeah, I remember.” For me, getting through the bonding ceremony with Oliver was like climbing up a steep hill. The final leg of a grueling, years-long marathon.
If we could have persevered and made it to the top, the hard part and all the bullshit would have been finished. We would have finally been left to our own devices and could start to learn each other and manage our own nest. We could have made our lives whatever we wanted, together.
In the end, I was persevering on my own. After all that time and effort, I’ve stumbled back down to the bottom of the hill and I don’t know what to do. I don’t have the endurance, nor the motivation, to climb it again. Because in my eyes, there is no “top.” There is no escape from this anymore. It’s all uphill.
Leoni’s offer is a new pathway altogether. I can turn around, walk away from the hill, and this novel trail is paved in a beautiful stone that I’ve never seen before.
“Leave all this behind for two weeks,” Raphael says. “We’ll figure something out as far as clearing your schedule. There may be one or two things you’ll need to come back for, just so you’re not completely AWOL. But I think we can make this work.”
“You’re surprisingly supportive. I thought we’d have more deliberation. Some weighing of our options.”
Raphael scoffs. “What options? I’m not keen on your mother selling you off to Old Man Lecherous, and youalready told me you don’t want to run away from Eden, so this is it, buttercup. The best choice we’ve been presented with thus far.”
“True.” I nod. “Agreed.”
“I’ll support you in this, but,” Raphael goes on, “I have one condition.”
“Which is?”
His expression turns serious, creating a stiff, startling tension in the air. “Stop feeding from Oliver’s leftover bags. Today. I’ll supply a neutral source for you, then you can take the new bags to the cottage with you. Clean slate.”
My spine goes rigid and I inhale as anxiety washes through me.
Giving up Oliver’s blood is… I’m not sure if I’m ready to?—
“When’s the last time you fed?” Raphael asks, cutting into my thoughts.
“Um… last weekend. I’m due today or tomorrow.”
Raphael shakes his head. “No more stretching out your feedings like this. We’re done sipping and savoring him intinydoses like some discontinued soda flavor. I’ll go out to the blood boutique today and get some bags for you to try tonight. If you’re going to leave here and do this, then start fresh, Lexie. Don’t take Oliver into this new circumstance. It’s time to let him go.”
Stressed, I wring my hands underneath the table and between my thighs. I understand what Raphael is saying. I do. But… what does that mean? Let him go? How can I just let go of someone who’s been the center of my existence for so long? Someone who’s helped to change me and who’s essentially altered the way I view the world I’m living in.
And is it right to let him go, completely? Can’t I hold onto some part of him? Not crying and feeling like I’m drowning at the drop of a hat, but… maybe in a healthier way? Somehow?
“What’s your answer?” Raphael prods. The rain taps loudly against the windows of the breakfast room. I look toward the glass and the view outside is streaked and distorted with heavy tears from the sky.
