Page 23 of Vampires of Eden
I wasn’t like this before. In the past, I could properly gain weight. I wasn’t stripped down to this nearly emaciated frame. There was a softness to my jawline and cheeks. Definition lining the muscles of my arms, shoulders, back and torso. Warmth and passion in my lilac eyes.
All of that is gone.Thisis my reality now and I accept it. Iaccept myself. There’s no use whining over what’s been lost. Or the choices I’ve made.
Concentrating, I close my eyes to focus on the here and now. To my utter shock, a different pair of irises flash behind the darkness of my lids. Vibrant honey-brown and shimmering with flecks of golden light.
Alarmed, my pulse thumps in my throat as I jerk backward, blinking. “What the hell was that?” I stare at myself in the re-fogged mirror, analyzing. Bizarre.
This is because I feel guilty. Because of Roland.
Inhaling, then exhaling a deep breath, I shake it off and grab my towel. I take my sweet time because I’m not looking forward to this conversation with Leoni that I can no longer avoid. Even though I’ve been avoiding it for months. Ever since Oliver showed up on our doorstep.
In a surprise twist, Leoni doesn’t grill and skewer me over dinner. Instead, she tells me about the wine orders and other local markets she’s planning to attend in the coming months to sell off some of our inventory.
“The Hollywick locals were wary at first, but now they’re warming up to me,” she says, gripping the large crock pot and looking for a space to stash it in the fridge.
At the counter, I grin while pre-rinsing and loading our dishes into the washer. “Now that they know you’re not there to throw your weight around, impose new rules or raise the land taxes.”
“Right. I just smiiile and smiiile and eventually, they lower their guard. I’m building trust in the community, in my own small way. You should come with me to Seze when I go.”
I shake my head as I finish my task. “Nope. I’ll only make it worse. I can barely lift the wine cases to help you. Plus, nobody can sense my presence, so vamps are always jumpy around me. They won’t want to buy anything from an emaciated ghoul.”
“Danny, that’s not true,” she says, closing the refrigerator door. “You don’t have any issues when you go into Hollywick.”
“Not anymore. It took the farmers and shop owners months to get used to the sight of me. I won’t be a good addition for your goodwill publicity and marketing campaign, trust me.”
Drying my hands, I casually think back to those early days when we first moved here and I’d go into town for groceries. The perplexed stares and indiscreet whispers. Everyone constantly asking, “Are you alright? Are you alright?”
As Leoni walks past, she throws a glance over her shoulder. “Fine. Are we ready to talk about what happened today with Alexander?” She heads into the living room, leaving me alone in the kitchen. It feels like I’ve been punched in the gut.
“What did Kathryn tell you?” I ask, trailing behind her. Already, she’s seated by the fire and back in her armchair.
“In so many words? That you were an asshole toward Puercoespín. You said something rude enough to make him leave the house, like, immediately.”
Taking the armchair across from her, I shrug. “That’s the gist of it. Nothing more to discuss, really. Good talk.” I meet her steely gaze in a silent stand-off. We are two vampires rooted in our opposing views.
Breaking the silence, she sighs. “You shouldn’t be like this.”
“Why shouldn’t I?”
“Because it’s bad for you. It doesn’t help your situation. Can’t you see that?”
“My situation is what it is. There’s no changing it.”
“Estás equivocado, querido amigo.”
She stares at me once more, as if my stance on this topic physically hurts her. As if I’m breaking her heart.
You’re wrong, my friend.
I wish she would let this go. Once upon a time, it was painful for me, too. But now? I feel nothing. I’m practically dead. Inside and out.
“You once told me that you think Oliver and these otherpurebreds who are leaving Eden are cowards,” Leoni goes on. “That they’re running away from their problems.”
“They are. They flee our aristocracy because they acknowledge that the rules and culture here are outdated and wrong—but they don’t do anything about it. They only look after themselves. The rest of us are stuck here with no true agents for change.”
Every time we hear about some new Eden purebred who’s run off to Italy or France, I’m annoyed. They flee to destinations across the world in search of a better quality of life. Good for them, but what about the rest of us? What about those of us whocan’tleave because of passport and border restrictions?
Leoni shifts to the edge of her seat and leans with her elbows on her knees. “Alright. How are you any different?”
