Page 114 of Vampires of Eden: Oliver
As he steps inside with my gift bouquet in hand, he removes his shoes and places them on a rack, so I do the same.
“Red wine or white?” he asks.
“Red, please.” I walk further into the open space toward the couch. “You really like peonies. There are so many…”
“I do, indeed,” Aries quips, making his way over to the kitchen. He bustles around underneath white spotlights like he’s a chef filming a TV show.
“Have… you always liked them this much?” I stop in the middle of the room and glance up to my left. A wooden staircase leads to a cozy-looking loft with a bed. There, too, on the nightstand, is a large vase full of puffy pink flowers.
This is starting to feel strange, because he didn’t request all these flowers when he stayed at the castle in Eden.
“Define ‘always’?” he says, chuckling and uncorking a bottle at the counter.
He’s laughing, but I’m not as I look over at him. “Aries, are you addicted to me in some way?”
There’s a moment of pause as he pours the burgundy wine and half fills one of the glasses. He concentrates, making sure that he doesn’t spill. “‘Addicted’ is a strong word.”
“Okay, but are these flowers because of me? Has something within you shifted since you left Eden?” My anxiety flares up as I watch him. This situation was his biggest fear the entire time we were together. It was the reason I held back and learned how to restrain myself.
Was all of that for nothing? Have I still managed to hurt him?
Aries sets the bottle down and takes a breath. “Let’s talk. We need to talk, yes?” He abandons the wine, moves around the counter and stalks forward. When he’s close, he takes hold of my hand and urges me toward the couch.
“I’m guessing peonies aren’t just your all-time favorite flower,” I say, worried and feeling a flood of guilt.
He smiles, meeting my eyes. “They are now. Let me preface this with assuring you that I’m fine.”
“Okay…”
He sits back comfortably and takes another deep breath. His shoulders rise and fall. “After I left Eden, I’d get… I’m not sure. Tremors? Shaky in a subtle way that’s never happened in my life. It wasn’t crippling, but sporadic and unsettling. I find that if I have these flowers around, the scent of them calms me. Because, admittedly, they remind me of you.”
I squeeze his hand harder as my throat closes. “Why didn’t you tell me this?”
“Why would I tell you? It isn’t detrimental to my health, and I’ve found a way to manage it.”
“But you always tell me that I can talk to you—topleasecommunicate and be honest with you. Why haven’t you done that with me? Why doesn’t it go both ways?”
“It does—but what would you have done if I’d told you about this, Oliver? Not accepted a fantastic apprenticeship that’s allowed you to strengthen your craft while traveling all across Asia? Not made new friends and connections? Would you have rushed to be here with me, so that I could hinder you?”
“You’d never hinder me, Aries. Not ever.” I clasp his hand with both of mine as I stare into his eyes, because I want him to understand. “We can’t be balanced if I’m the only one being honest and openly communicating.”
“I know that, darling. I just… I don’t want you to feel obligated. You’ve spent your entire life restrained and duty-bound.” He lifts his hand and kisses one of my knuckles, then rests his nose there as his eyes flutter closed. “Now that you’re free, I want you to enjoy your life, uninhibited and unburdened. My intention is to support you in whatever you want. WhatIwant is for you to be happy and live in the fullness of who you are.”
My pulse is beating so hard that it thrums in my ears. I take a deep breath, pushing past the fear of rejection and anxiety and saying what’s in my heart. “What if what I want is you? To live in the fullness of who I am—to be uninhibited and unburdened, butwithyou, Aries.”
His eyes open and his deep-blue gaze locks on mine. The air around us feels stagnant. I swallow, wanting to fill the silence because my heart can’t take it. “Can I have that?”
“I’ll be a burden to you.”
I shake my head. “You won’t.”
“I will. If we’re together and I’m feeding from you, I’ll be dependent upon you, Oliver. You won’t be able to go too far, or stay away for too long without me, do you understand? You’ll always have to consider me in any assignment or travel plans you make.”
“I’ll be dependent on you, too,” I rationalize. “It goes both ways.”
“Yes, and you’ll be restricted and encumbered again. Just as you were in Eden—”
“No. Eden was different because I had no choice there. The restrictions were forced on me. But I’mchoosingyou. And you would never be a burden, because all you’ve ever done since the moment we met is set me free. All you’ve ever done is open my eyes, encourage and lift me up. It’s like—you’ve given me wings, Aries! You could never restrict me because that’s not who you are. That’s not whoweare. And I’d be thrilled to consider you and have you depend on me. I’d be honored that you chose me as your feeding source.”
