Page 56 of The Awakening
“Correct.”
Cyrus shifts his gaze to Jae, focusing like a laser. “Christ, man—are yousleepingwith him?”
“For God’s sake, Cyrus, please stop it, alright? Just calm down. You’rekillingme here. Literally murdering me. Blood bath. All manner of forensic evidence.”
Jae’s typically airy English accent has suddenly become heavier, his words less rhotic and his vowels longer, with Cy’s appearance—as if he’s been curbing his speech pattern for us American-dialect speakers. As if we wouldn’t understand him in his natural state.
The loose cannon pauses, seemingly taking his friend into consideration for the first time since Jae opened the door. He inhales and exhales a deep breath before he reluctantly looks at me. “Sorry, mate.”
I raise my eyebrow and move around the two of them and toward the door. “It seems you both need some time to catch up. I’m going to the café down the street. Would either of you like anything?”
“No, thank you.” Jae sighs, rubbing the bridge of his nose and lifting his glasses.
Cyrus lifts his chin, snide. “I’m good. Cheers.”
I nod politely before I make my exit. God. Cyrus is like a ball of fire and tension—essentially the last fucking thing we need right now. I’m already on edge about this entire ordeal, trying to be calm. To take ownership for the fireI’vestarted.
What Haruka didn’t tell Jae is that he thinks my biting him was the trigger. I told him Jae has been fed from by other vampires before, but my bloodline quality is what makes this time different. Things have been tense between us since the moment I saw him almost two months ago, and the pull has only grown stronger the closer we become.
It scares the hell out of me.
It was one thing when I thought he was a special snowflake of a human. Knowing he’s like me—that he’s vampiric in nature and therefore capable of forming a bond—now it feels like I’m playing with matches in dry, dry brush. My entire lifestyle, everything I’ve built for myself, is being threatened. One wrong move and all of it goes up in smoke. I’ll be chained to him forever, without even knowing what kind of vampire he truly is.
Who will he become when his nature fully awakens? How much will he change? Is stiff, arrogant, ranked-vampire pride inherited within our blood, or is it learned? Nature or nurture? I can’t possibly know right now.
I like Jae. Alot. He’s hilarious and kind, intelligent, insightful and grounded… endearingly anxious, brazen and warm. Beautiful. If that wasn’t enough, he tastes amazing. Ilikehim. But I can’t give up my freedom for him. Or anyone. Not forever.
Twenty-Six
Jae
“Tell me you’re not shagging him then.”
Cyrus is pacing back and forth in front of me. I’m sitting on my bed, my back pressed into the wall and my legs folded in a sort of Zen yoga position. It’s not helping me feel relaxed.
“Well?” He pauses, staring at me. Technically, I’m not sleeping with Junichi anymore. He just told me we can’t.
“I’m not,” I say simply.
Cyrus draws back. “So you haven’t?Ever?”
Well… that’s a different question, isn’t it? I dodge it.
“Will you please relax?” I ask. “Why have you come here to shout at me? Ever since I’ve moved here you’ve beencompletelyunsupportive. Even before that, you make fun of my career and research, my sexuality—”
“I was just having a laugh with you about those things. Don’t be sensitive—”
“But it’snotfunny, Cyrus.”
Ihateit when people say, “Don’t be sensitive.” Such a twat thing to say. To me it reads, “Oh, don’t be an actual complex, living and breathing person with feelings, different experiences and perspectives than my own. Just accept thatI’man insensitive arsehole, will you?” People are horrid.
“That’s what I’m telling you,” I say. “You’ve been even more of a knobhead about me living here—but Ialwayssupport you. In becoming a dentist, in getting engaged with Pippa… when you decided to do that fucking ‘juice cleanse’ for thirty days and you looked like a walking advert to help feed starving children.”
Cyrus folds his arms, pouting. “Prat.”
“Can you just be supportive of me—for once?Our lives… We’re changing. You’re getting married soon. I’m learning a lot about myself here, and it’s good for me. Can you please respect that and not scream at me all the time?”
Exhaling a heavy breath, Cyrus stalks toward me and climbs onto the bed. He sits beside me, facing me. His expression is sincere and relaxed for the first time since he’s stepped into my flat.
