Page 38 of The Awakening
“Why the hell would they do that? We take pride in our natures.”
“Correct. However…” Haruka takes a deep breath, his brow crinkled. “This is conjecture, but Jae is of English descent. We know that British vampires have a particularly violent and bloody past with the clan wars. What if… to escape the immediate threats, the vampires of the past decided to shut their bloodlines down? Turn in on themselves?”
This is a lot to take in, this wild theory. Haruka is more alive and excited than I’ve seen him in weeks. It’s kind of nice. “Again, I hear you. But I don’t see how any of this could be possible.”
“No one thought breaking a bond was possible until it happened to me.”
I nod. “True…”
“And I did not think bonding on the first try was possible until it happened to me. So I feel this circumstance is feasible. Perhaps the details of my theory are fallible. Nonetheless, Jae is a ranked vampire. If you feed from him, it will solidify my claim.”
I rub my hand into the top of my head, fluffing out the tight curls there, and sigh. “I’m not feeding from him. I’m busy. I can’t afford to be locked up in the house for multiple days if you’re wrong.”
He shakes his head. “I am not.”
I roll my eyes.
“Junichi—the fact that he is even closely associated with us is telling. We do not casually consort with humans.”
“I do,” I admit, shrugging.
“This isdifferent. Jae studies vampires, he works in a vampire-owned hospital and is now living in a heavily populated vampiric realm. He is dating an elite first-gen vampire and working with purebred vampires to launch a very culturally significant program. The signs are everywhere.”
“Maybe he’s just a very lucky groupie?” I jest, but I do believe him now that he’s pointed all this shit out to me. It makes me nervous, and I don’t want to think about it right now. “What are you going to Hong Kong for?”
“There is a Historian there, a colleague whose library reaches back further than mine. I contacted her recently, and she has some ancient documents on vampiric suppression. I am going there to read her materials.”
“Wow, you’re really taking this seriously.”
Haruka frowns like I’m being stupid. “Something very interesting and rare is happening within my realm. It is my responsibility to understand and potentially help Jae should the need arise.”
I steel myself and ask the crucial question. “If you think Jae is a repressed ranked vampire, does that mean I shouldn’t be sleeping with him? Am I in danger of accidentally bonding with him?”
Haruka’s face is flat now, but it’s still a look that says I’m being stupid. “Jun. It takes two-way feeding and sex to bond… and I suspect even more than that, now that Nino and I have thoroughly manipulated theLore and Lustdata and spoken to many Socotra purebreds. You refuse to feed from him, and he has no interest in feeding from you. Sono. You won’t bond.”
He’s right. That was a stupid question—like I’m a kid asking how babies are born. Except I’m old as hell and know better. I exhale in relief. Sleeping with Doctor Jae was a delicious and fulfilling experience, and I genuinely enjoy spending time with him. I’m looking forward to seeing him again.
I don’t like fooling around with ranked vampires. The larger part of me hopes Haruka is wrong about all of this.
But something inside me knows he’s probably right.
Eighteen
Jae
I think it’s selfish to hide things about yourself. Especially if you’re in a relationship. Essentially, you’re taking control and deciding that your desires and well-being supersede your partner’s. Seems a bit unfair.
“So what will happen if I stop?” It’s Saturday, and I’m having a consultation with the last patient on my schedule.
“Well…” I consider. “You’ll experience a noticeable difference in your energy levels and senses. Your nature is primarily human, but on the higher end of the low-level vampire spectrum. To stop drinking blood altogether will be much like going through drug withdrawal. It is something that has enhanced your body and senses for years. Ten, right?”
My patient rubs his hands into his hair, utterly stressed. He hunches, placing his elbows against his thighs. “Yeah… I started when I was twenty-one. It helped me get through my doctorate. Now that I’m with Ami…Shit.I don’t want her to know about this. I don’t want to do this anymore.”
Ami is my patient’s fiancée. He intentionally hides his “other” nature from her. She’s human and he thinks it will freak her out, so he wants to stop drinking blood altogether. But that’ll be hard since he’s been doing it for so long. As a low-leveler, once you submit to that part of your nature, it’s quite difficult to turn off.
“Sometimes… I want to bite her when we’re sleeping together. I told you my teeth can actually sharpen into little points?”
“Yes, you mentioned it before. But this is nothing to be alarmed about. It’s fairly common among people in your similar circumstance.” His incisors won’t fully elongate like a ranked vampire’s, because his biology doesn’t require as much blood. My understanding is that the higher the physiological need for blood, the longer, sharper and more intense the fangs.
