Page 84 of Unhinged Cravings
A note sat on his pillow, and I sat up, pulling the sheets to my chest.
For all that I didn’t say, I’m sorry. You have changed me forever, wildcat.
Conquer the world, and when you’re done, if my mark remains, find me.
I understood then why he had pulled away. Left me. It wasn’t just to keep me out of danger. It was a chance for space. To test if it had been real or something that only existed because I’d developed some attachment to him as my captor. That damned syndrome I couldn’t remember the name of.
My head hit the pillow hard, sending the down puffing around it. He was right. We needed time apart. Our lives were so different. Even if we had met each other under different circumstances, becoming involved with a man like Emerson Tides was like stepping into a hornet’s nest and hoping you didn’t get stung. It meant danger and more. He didn’t want me in that danger, but if I chose to face it, he would be there. Only if it was my choice and not some byproduct of a kidnapping.
I held the note to my chest. This had happened so fast that it couldn’t be real. But every part of me screamed it was. That no matter the space and time apart, I would still need him. I looked over, seeing my meds on the side table and knowing he had ensured I took them even when I slept. Always taking care of me,putting me before his needs. My morally gray man who had taken down his enemy with no hesitation to save me.
The energy to get up was hard to muster, but I managed to, finding a clean set of clothes in the bathroom along with a small box. I left it there, showering first, not ready to open it, to say my last goodbye to him. I knew he was gone. Understood that last night had been his goodbye, but this was one last gesture from him like the note on the pillow.
After dressing, I sat on the side of the bed and opened the box. In a nest of black velvet sat a collection of diamonds to replace my piercings. I tugged the tiny note below them.No other man gets to see these. You wear them only when you’re ready for me to see them.
I closed the lid, shaking my head. “Confusing bastard.” Letting me go, but still laying a claim. An offer to come back to him just like the note. The promise for me to clear my head, let the events of the last two weeks settle, then see if I still loved him.
The note scrunched in my hand, a swelling pressure building in my chest. Love? Was that what this was? He loved me enough to let me go, and I loved him enough to let him go. To test that love and see if it lasted when distance and life stood between us.
Sadness had seeped its way into my bones while I’d been in the shower, but now it crept away because I knew this wasn’t goodbye. Knew no matter how many beautiful brunettes crossed his path, Emerson Tides would only have his mind on me. That the hottest man could tempt me at the bar and I’d know there was no temptation because the only man who could truly worship my body was on the other side of the country, thinking about me.
Taking the box, I made my way downstairs. Hugs from Den and Riley. A curt nod with a half-smile from Greyson, which was more than I usually got. The plane ride was long and the further I traveled from Emerson, the greater the tug at my core that reminded me I would always be tethered to that place on the coast and theman who filled it.
Riley chatted about how Greyson had arranged for me to make up the missed time at school. I had already finished my thesis, but I had missed my presentation. They would overlook my time away and reschedule, allowing me to walk and collect my degree in a special ceremony. My job was still there, my boss not caring that I had missed so many days. Life would return, but I wasn’t sure it would ever be normal again. Emerson had said I changed him, but he had changed me, too.
As the conversation died down, I pulled the new drawing book out that Emerson had left for me and began to draw.
Chapter Thirty
EMERSON
Leaving Ava had been the toughest thing I’d ever faced. I hadn’t intended to, had wanted to keep her with me, to never let her go. But seeing her so fragile and hurt that night had opened my eyes to the dangers she faced with me. I couldn’t keep her in this world. She had stayed sheltered for so many years and she was safer under my brother’s watch. Her uncle would ensure she stayed that way, just like he always had.
But that excuse had only been part of the reason I’d left her. I needed to know if it had been real. If the emotions would remain with distance and time or fade because it had only been the situation causing them. And if they remained, then to offer her the power to return on her own. Not me forcing her into my life like I had, but her choosing that life. A life with me, a life of danger. As much as I hated the thought of being without her, I wanted her safe. The thought of anything else happening to her killed me, but if she decided I was worth taking the chance, then I would accept her decision and find every way in my power to ensure no one hurt her again.
Needing my mind off her, which was difficult to do, I threw myself into rebuilding my businesses, cleaning up the messesHenley and his idiots had made. I denounced all association with trafficking after seeing for myself how horrendous it was. My reputation didn’t need that stain. The girls we found we had freed, returning them to their homes and giving funds to those who had no home so they could start a new life. A convenient fire at the warehouse had left it in ashes and in its place, I was building a women’s shelter, with Jill leading the helm. The men in Henley’s database had suffered for their crimes and I had buried the remains of Henley and the other two who had touched Ava in the caved in tunnels. Every one of their last breaths had given me exquisite satisfaction.
Being in the house without Ava was miserable. All the little places she had left her mark reminded me of her. I kept the gray scarf I had taken from her the fateful night she’d come into my life next to my bed, picking it up every so often and inhaling her scent just to keep me sane.
My phone rang, and I picked up Greyson’s call. “Have you given it any thought?” Always right to the point.
“Hello to you, too, Grey.”
“I don’t have time for formalities, jackass. You know who it is.”
Chuckling, I said, “Yes. It’s a good offer.”
“Good? I don’t take partners, Mer. This offer is the only one you’ll ever get from me and the best.”
“Maybe, but I don’t like partners either, Grey. Too messy and you can’t trust them.”
His growl had me laughing harder. “Fine. I accept. Partners again, but this time dominating both coasts. It’s an empire that will be hard to take down, Grey.”
“Exactly. Just play nice. With Brinks in my life, Donelli and Strint are allies. Don’t piss them off and don’t get in their territories.”
“I don’t play nice.”
“Neither do I, but apparently we both do now.”
