Page 41 of My Bodyguard Neighbor
"Do I have that much power over you?"
"Yes.And it terrifies me."Holly covered his hands with hers."But I'm more scared of not having you in my life.Of waking up five years from now and realizing I let fear make my choices instead of making them myself."
Jonah kissed her.Slow and deep and full of everything two weeks of silence had built between them.Holly melted into it, into him, feeling like she could finally breathe again.
When they broke apart, Jonah rested his forehead against hers."So what do we do now?"
"Now we try."Holly stepped back just enough to see his face."We keep our own apartments.We date.We figure out what this looks like when life isn't trying to kill us."
"That sounds good."
"I'm still going to need space sometimes.Still going to need to be alone with my art and my thoughts.That's not me pulling away.That's just who I am."
"I know.And I'm still going to worry too much and probably hover."Jonah smiled."That's just who I am."
"So we're both a mess."
"The best kind of mess."
Holly laughed, feeling lighter than she had in weeks."Tell me about the business.Bauer Security Consulting."
"I signed a lease on office space yesterday.Nothing fancy, just a small suite in a building downtown.But it's mine."
"What will you do?"
"Corporate security consulting.Training programs for executive protection teams.Maybe some private investigation work."He shrugged."Basically using everything I know to help people stay safe without having to kill anyone."
"That sounds perfect for you."
"Yeah?You don't think it's a terrible idea?"
Holly took his hand, lacing their fingers together."I think it's wonderful."
"Have you talked to your father?"Jonah asked.
"We had lunch yesterday."Holly made a face."It was awkward as hell.He tried to ask about my art and clearly had no idea what to say.I tried to ask about his work and realized I know nothing about what he actually does all day."
"But you went."
"I went.And I'll probably go again next week.Baby steps."Holly pulled her knees up to her chest."He's trying.I can tell he's trying.Whether he can actually change or if this is just temporary remains to be seen."
"You don't have to give him more chances if he doesn't deserve them."
"I know.But I want to try.Not for him.For me."Holly rested her chin on her knees."I spent three years angry at him.I don't want to spend the next thirty that way."
Jonah nodded, understanding.They sat in comfortable silence for a moment, just being near each other.
"I have something to show you," Holly said, standing.She crossed to a stack of canvases leaning against the wall and pulled one out."I finished this last week."
The painting was of Jonah.Not the version she'd sketched in the cabin, softened and idealized.This was honest.Hard edges and shadows, but also light.The violence he was capable of, yes, but also the gentleness.The way he'd held her after nightmares.The way he'd respected her choices even when they scared him.
"That's how you see me?"Jonah asked.
"That's who you are."
He stared at the painting for a long moment."I don't know if I deserve that.The light parts, I mean."
"You don't get to decide what you deserve.I do."Holly set the canvas back against the wall."And I think you deserve everything."
