Page 229 of Hymns of the Broken
I dangle the dildo at her, grinning. “Seriously, Hellcat? This little thing?” I glance down at it, then back at her, smirking. “You want to keep it for nostalgia, or should we just toss it out since you’vebeen properly upgraded?”
She rolls her eyes, biting back a smile. “Oh my God, Riot, put that down.”
I wave it at her, voice low, teasing. “Hey, I’m just saying—I’ve seen you take more than this with a smile on your face. You need a replacement, you call me.”
She snatches it out of my hand, laughing. “Get out of my stuff, you menace.”
Sawyer steps in, rolling her eyes, but she’s smiling—that soft, ‘I’m home’ kind of smile that makes my chest ache. For a second, I bask in the way she looks at me, but then it creeps back in. That this is Jasper’s house, Jasper’s bed, and eventually I’m going to be the one packing up my little bag, leaving them alone together. And what if that’s what she wants? What if she decides I’m just the messy middle, a good distraction until she picks the guy with the mansion and the wounds that match her own?
She must see something shift in my face, because her smile fades. She crosses the room, hands slipping to my waist, searching my eyes. “Hey. What’s going on in that brain of yours?”
I swallow, trying to play it cool, but it comes out rougher than I mean it to. “Just… thinking I’m gonna miss you. And I know you say you want both of us, but what if you wake up and realize you’re happier with just him? What if you don’t need me anymore?”
God, it sounds so fucking needy when I say it out loud. I almost want to take it back, but she doesn’t let me. She presses in closer, arms around my waist, grounding me.
“Look at me.” She waits until I do—until I can’t hide, not from her. “You are not just the extra, Riot. You’re it for me, too. I need you. I want you. I don’t want to do this without you.”
I hugherso tight I’m afraid I’ll crushher, butshelaughs, kisses me, and tells me I’m hers.
“I mean it,” she whispers, her forehead pressed to mine. “You’re not losing me.”
“But I won’t be here all the time, Hellcat. I won’t be here with you. You’ll be in this house with just him. You’ll… you’ll learn to be without me while I’m gone.”
She goes quiet, her smile fading as she studies me. There’s something raw in my chest, something wild and scared that I can’t hide.
“You’ll get used to it,” I mutter, almost bitterly. “You’ll figure out how to sleep without me, eat breakfast with justhim, wake up, and not have me to drag you back to bed. And I’ll be back home, trying not to fucking lose my mind.”
Her hand finds mine, squeezing. I want to believe it means something. I want to believe I matter enough that she won’t let go—even if I’m not here to see it. Before I can say anything else, there’s a pointed cough from the doorway.
I look up to see Jasper there, arms folded, eyebrow cocked, mouth twitching with that smug half-smile. “You two planning on cuddling all night, or should I come back with a camera?”
I roll my eyes and shrug. “Don’t act like you wouldn’t watch.”
Jasper snorts. “I mean, yeah, but only because I know you’d narrate the whole thing with some bullshit story about how you’re the favorite.” He leans against the doorframe, and for a second, there’s something softer in his eyes. “Seriously, though… place is too damn quiet without your running commentary and vulgar jokes, Riot.”
Sawyer snorts, and I flip him off, unable to hide my smile.
Jasper rolls his eyes, steps into the room, and lets the moment hang for a beat—like he’s thinking about how to say something real without making it too fucking heavy.
“You know you’re an idiot, right?” He glances at Sawyer, then back at me, voice dropping low and honest. “Why don’t you just move in, Riot? For real. Bring your shit—bring yourself. We’re better when you’re here. All of us.”
I stare at him, words stuck somewhere in my throat. Jasper shrugs, like it’s the simplest thing in the world. “So?”
Sawyer beams, and my chest aches, too full and too fucking hopeful to play it cool.
“Yeah,” I manage, trying to hide the crack in my voice. “Yeah, I’ll stay…but I’m sleeping in here.” I jerk my chin at the bed, right between him and Sawyer.
Sawyer bursts out laughing, eyes bright. Jasper rolls his eyes so hard I’m pretty sure he sees his brain. “Of course you are,” he deadpans. “Should’ve known you were just angling for a permanent invite to our bed.”
I shrug, grinning. “Hey, you offered. Might as well make myself comfortable.”
Sawyer grins between us, warm and wicked. “You two are going to be hell.”
JASPER
Three days after Riot moved in, the house finally feels full. His boxesare stackedin the hall, his boots are next to the door, andhis loud laugh echoes off the high ceilings. Macee’s been here the last couple of days helping Sawyer unpack, filling the place with her chaos and chatter. Silas came by today to review the next offers from management, but I think we’re going to take a break from touring for the rest of the year. Give me, Sawyer, and Riot, some more time together.
I think Riot said his band is taking a break too since Dex’s wife is going to be in labor with their first child any day now, and he wants to be home for the first few months after his daughter is born.
