Page 63 of Sawyer
“It was that damn kiss,” she hissed. “I should never have locked lips with you.”
He blurted out a laugh. “Locked lips, huh? We both know it’s more than that.”
“That’s the problem.” She lifted her hand in the air in frustration. “Maybe you should kiss me again and do it really badly. All wobbly tongue. Lots of slobber. I’ll be so icked out that I’ll never think about kissing you again.”
“Lots of slobber?” He couldn’t help but laugh. “What am I? A cow? Jesus.”
She was laughing too. “I guess it’s good we can joke about it.”
“Right now we can.” He sobered. “I wish it would last.”
She stilled. Yeah, because lately it hadn’t felt like a joke. Not to either of them.
Another quick drink and she was gripping her knees, facing him. “So if you won’t lay a slobbery kiss on me or jump my bones to exorcise this out of our systems, what’s our plan? Because I hate this too. I’m so pissed at the current drama between us that I wish I could cut this attraction out of us with my cleaver.”
He grimaced playfully. “I think my balls just shriveled.”
“Good! We should run with that. Then we can find something to make my lady parts shrivel.”
But he didn’t want anything to shrivel. He thought of their friends tonight. All of them with their Plus Ones, glowing like freaking neon signs at Hotel Paradise as they talked about their happy thoughts.
That brought him back. “Your happy thought was the same as mine. You don’t think that’s significant?”
Her eyes shuttered. “Look, I’m not like Doc or Dean whoread poetry and dream about big life things. I cook. The same dishes every night for months. I do the same things for hours every day. I— What I’m trying to say is that I’m a worker. That’s who I am.”
He wasn’t sure where this was going. “I like you as you are. If you started spouting poetry or talking about the futility of our life purpose, you wouldn’t be Madison.”
“What I’m saying is that I’m not introspective. I don’t journal at Paris cafés like Thea. I don’t listen to self-improvement podcasts like Brooke. I don’t give significance to you and me having the same happy thought. It was just the first one that popped into my mind.”
He had to hide his smile behind his glass. Didn’t she know how incredible that was? He thought she did. She just didn’t want to go there. Fine. He would give her a pass on it tonight. They had plenty to sift through. They each drank as if by mutual silent agreement.
“So where are we?” She locked her arms over her chest after she set her drink down, the black of her outfit making her eyes appear more golden, the way a black panther’s eyes seemed to glow brighter in the wild.
He gestured between them. “Have you ever thought about us trying to do this?”
Her mouth parted before she snapped it shut. “This? What’s this?”
She was being purposely obtuse now, and he was so not giving her a pass. “I mean date. Go out. Be a couple. We’re great friends. We’re hot for each other. I think it could be good.”
Her barstool suddenly screeched on the floor as she shoved out of it, chin lifting. “Good?Yeah, it could be good. We’d hold hands and feed each other little bites of something. Then we’d bang until sweat dripped on the floor.”
She paused. Desire shot through him. She gulped. Heheaved out a breath. Because it was way too easy to imagine. “It would be good, Mad. Really, really good.”
The shadows around her eyes were suddenly back. “But what about after?”
“After?”
She stalked the few remaining steps between them and smacked him in the shoulder. “After! Because it’s not going to last. Then we’ll be angry or hurt—and not best friends probably. We’ll blow up this whole family of ours, dammit! I don’t want that, Kyle.”
Didn’t he know the same cold fear? He reached for her, wanting to assure her, but she knocked his hand to the side.
“I can’t do that, Kyle.”
That damn painful knot was back in his throat as he gazed at her. She was looking at him, all scared woman, all dear friend. He knew how brave she was and that she feared this was almost too much for him. He remembered Sawyer saying they were both afraid. Kyle had felt it in himself and seen it in her, but he hadn’t realized how afraid she was. The sight of her like this nearly brought him to the floor.
“You don’t believe we could make it.”
She shook her head. “No, my track record isn’t great. Don’t take this wrong, Kyle, but neither is yours. If Paisley was the woman you thought you wanted to spend your life with, then you’re looking for something a whole hell of a lot different than me.”
