Page 85 of The Calendar of New Beginnings
He tugged her back, drinking in her soft gaze. “I don’t want to leave this.”
A half smile touched her face. “We won’t.”
But she kept her back to him as she rose and pulled on a robe from her bag, and he could feel that they were once again on unfamiliar ground. At least there were puffy clouds beneath their feet.
She was making sandwiches when he joined her in the kitchen. He wrapped his arms around her middle. The sweep of her mustard-covered knife slowed on the bread.
“Well,”he said in a deep voice. He hadn’t heard himself sound this way for some time, husky and satisfied, replete from lovemaking.
“Well,”she replied, resumingher task.
“Can you stop making the sandwiches for just a minute, please?”
She set the knife down on the counter and turned around. There wasn’t a smile on her face, but her eyes were serious.
“Are we going to talk about what we’re feeling here?” he asked, suddenly awkward again. “I…it was cataclysmic for me. You?”
“Same,” she said, leaning back against the counter. “I was trying to credit it to the pillow.”
A smile tugged at his lips. “Seriously?”
Her shoulder lifted. “I’ve never…”
“Ah…it’s an anatomy thing,” he said, putting his hand next to hers on the counter. “I studied anatomy, remember?”
“You always were an A student,” she responded, giving away nothing.
“It wasn’t the pillow. It was us. This.”
She heaved out a slow breath. “I know. I thought it would be good, but I didn’t see this coming, frankly.”
It was hard not to grin. “Neither did I, but as my mother always says, ‘Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.’”
She punched him in the chest, righting the easy balance between them. “Thanks for making me think about your mother after I just had wild sex with her son.”
Since she was starting to seem more like herself, he pressed a little closer. All he wanted to do was put her on the countertop and gobble her up. “It was more than wild sex.”
“Yes, it sure was. As I was making the sandwiches, I finally realized why.”
He couldn’t keep from sliding his arms around her waist. “Enlighten me.”
She pressed her lips together like she was trying to find the words. “When I was out on a particularly tough assignment, I would come back to wherever I was staying feeling numb. It was like everything inside me was frozen after what I’d seen. If I had Internet, I’d pull up my computer and write to you—even if you weren’t awake.”
How many nights had he done the same with her? Especially after Kim had died. She’d been his salvation in a way, the one person with whom he could share his deepest and darkest hurts and fears.
“When I finished writing you, I could feel my heart again.”
He was stunned for a moment when the words sunk in. “Oh, Lucy.”
She took his hand and placed it over the spot that reverberated in steady, easy beats.
“I felt like that again after we made love,” she said, and he knew it was the first time she’d used that term instead of sex. “Andy, you help me get in touch with my heart. You always have. And today…today you put me into a deeper connection with my heart than I’ve ever experienced.” She looked at him, and he was alarmed to see tears gathered in the corners of her eyes. “I didn’t expect that.”
His own heart thundered in his chest.
“You’ve always helped me feel my heart too,” he said quietly, “even when I didn’t think I had one left.”
She cupped his chin. “I love you.”
