Page 16 of The Calendar of New Beginnings
She blinked a couple times. “You want me to shoot photos for aPlayboy-like calendar?” Her mom had never been shy about her body. In fact, she was infamous around town for her habit of hopping into the backyard hot tub naked in broad daylight. But this…
“No, dear,” April said earnestly, patting Lucy’s hand. “Nothing like that. Although I have been called Miss April before.”
Her mother snorted. Miss April? This was not the kind of information Lucy wanted taking up space in her brain.
“While it might be fun to go for the full monty, your mother and I have decided on something else,” April continued. “We’ll be naked—like the women in the movie—and cover our…ah…feminine parts with amusing props. Like cantaloupes or something.” She made a gesture to her ample chest.
“We’re going to need pretty big cantaloupes for you, April,” her mom said, starting to laugh.
“Or those small watermelons at the market,” April added seriously, shorting out Lucy’s brain momentarily.
Mrs. Hale, the woman who used to make cookies for the school bake sale and had taught all her daughters not to let boys touch their private parts, was talking like this?
Lucy felt a headache coming on. She just couldn’t get past the naked part—and all the melon talk.
Then her mom walked to the fruit bowl sitting on the counter. “Too bad I don’t have a weenie because we have to use this banana for something. Guess I’ll have to settle for the avocados since I’m only a B-cup.”
Lucy put a hand to her forehead as her mother picked up a pair of avocados and arranged them against her boobs. “Please, Mom. Stop. You’re going to give me nightmares.”
April chortled. “Hand me those mangoes, Ellen, and I’ll show you where to put them.”
All hell really had broken loose. Her mom was pressing two avocados to her breasts while April nestled the mangoes against her girls.
“I really am going to need cantaloupes or watermelons,” April said, tsking as she set her fruit on the counter. “Mangoes are way too small.”
“Ladies, please,” Lucy implored, trying to rein them back in. “If you want me to take this seriously, you need to put the fruit down. Now, Mother.”
Her mom wiggled her body suggestively before putting the avocados down. “You’re so serious sometimes.”
“I’m a professional,” Lucy said, making them both sputter with laughter. “Let’s start over. You’re planning to do a calendar to raise money for breast cancer. Obviously, the two of you have volunteered for photos, but a year has twelve months.”
Her mom rolled her eyes. “We have otherpeople lined up besides us, Lucy. Everyone has lost someone to cancer. And it’s not just women. We have men too. Your father had reservations, but April and I are committed to the idea of an equal opportunity calendar.”
She could imagine it now. Old men with hot dogs in front of their family jewels. Her stomach churned from the horror. “You don’t mean Andy, do you?” Surely her friend would have told her about this if he’d known. Besides, she couldn’t see Andy posing nude with a foot-long in front of his… Oh, she needed to stop that train of thought right this minute.
“Of course not,” her mother said. “He’s the father of a young son. How would it look if he posed naked with a frankfurter covering his crotch?”
The nightmare just wouldn’t stop. “Please. Can we try and keep this…I don’t know…somewhat professional? Right now, this whole thing sounds pretty risqué. I’ve never done anything like this, and even though it’s for a good cause, I might not be the right person to help.” Besides, she wasn’t sure she could even take photos right now.
April’s face fell. “It’s going to be tasteful, Lucy, I promise you.”
Her mother glared at her. “Do you think something like this is beneath you, what with you being a hot-shot photojournalist and all?”
Now that hurt. But there was some truth to it. She was known for her work. How would it look if she photographed a scantily-clad calendar, even if it did raise money for a worthy cause?
“Do you really think Dare Valley is…liberal enough to support this effort?” Lucy could easily imagine how some would react.
“It’s a small community,” April said with a sigh. “Weexpect there will be some resistance, but we’re hoping that it won’t be an issue considering how many respected citizens have agreed to participate.”
“Don’t forget the involvement of a famous, well-respected photographer,” her mother added, picking up the banana and shaking it in her direction.
Lucy felt a pinch of guilt, which was probably her mother’s intention.
“Florence Henklemeyer is going to be fit to be tied over this,” her mom continued, waving the banana about like she was Justice with her shining sword. “But after the smear campaign Florence’s son pulled on Matt in the mayoral primary, we’re looking forward to putting their knickers in a wad.”
“Florence went after Jane for being a former poker babe, saying she was indecent,” April said, a hard gleam in her eyes. “Your mom and I aren’t going to back down to the likes of her. This calendar is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s going to help a lot of women get mammograms and other care. After what happened to Kim and my own scare with breast cancer, I want to do something to help.”
There was fire in her voice, and it roused the fighter in Lucy. Breast cancer did need to be fought, both through raising awareness and money for research and care.
