Page 70 of Brooke
Kyle glanced back at him, and they shared a look without communicating aloud. Yeah, Golden Boy was on board with that idea. He imagined Sawyer was as well, but he didn’t have a good line of sight on him in the cramped car.
“Thanks, Dean,” Brooke said, tapping her fingernails together unconsciously. “That’s really sweet. But five years is good for me. Plenty of time to do things right. Besides, we’ve got a million things on our plates with PRG. I take my responsibilities seriously with you guys.”
“But Dean’s right,” Sawyer said quietly from the other side of the car. “We want you to be happy, Brooke.”
Ah, Doc could always be counted on.
“I am, Sawyer.” She flashed them all a megawatt smile of assurance, one Dean knew she’d amped up. “Or getting there. One step at a time. Come on. Let’s get back to the house.”
As they sped back to their digs, Dean told himself to let it go. But now he had a feeling in his gut about Brooke and her happiness. If that building was tied to it, then he needed to do something about it. The urge to buy the building called to him like a siren, but he knew he needed more from Brooke before pulling that trigger.
The question was: what?
CHAPTER
SIXTEEN
Sneaking around behind her roommates’ backs was going to kill her.
The guilt pangs alone made her feel like she needed an antacid. Keeping things separate with Axel was taking every ounce of her focus. Not to mention keeping Nanine and her father’s secret, which thankfully hadn’t been too tough since no one had seen either of them since they were still in wine country. Everyone had seen their impromptu trip as more evidence that Nanine needed distance from the restaurant reopening, and she was deeply grateful for the lack of questions.
She was feeling super thankful to Sawyer for him walking the walk on hislive and let livephilosophy. If he sent her a knowing look or a smile when she headed out, that was between them. Even so, since Dean had questioned her reason for humming a week ago, she’d held herself in check at the house, telling herself the secrecy was in the best interest of the project.
She didn’t even know how to characterize what was happening with them anyway. Everything with Axel wasinsane—good insane,best emotional roller coaster of her lifeinsane, including the sex. Heat rushed over her skin like the fire in his fireplace, her favorite place to rip his clothes off and make love with him.
She tugged on the strap of her forest green merry widow, a new purchase in Axel’s favorite color, hoping the fabric wasn’t too well made to tear as he tugged it off impatiently. Together, they’d both unlocked their deeper sensual selves—a journey of discovery that sometimes scared her and made her question who she really was.
How hadn’t she recognized the deep wells of want and desire inside her? Her capacity for tenderness and mind-obliterating passion?
With him, she’d tried new things and given herself in a way she’d never imagined. They were on a sensual adventure, he liked to say. He’d done the same with her, and in his every honest sensual plea and command, she found voice to hidden desires lurking deeper inside her.
She honestly couldn’t find words to explain what was happening to her. But Axel didn’t need the words. The other night, when she’d pressed her face into his naked chest because she’d felt too raw and consumed by her newfound feelings, he’d only wrapped her up against his big strong body until they’d passed.
Except they never truly passed.
They seemed to be changing her inner makeup, like when Madison had added champagne vinegar to a violet syrup, changing its color.
She was different. Changing more every day. And Brooke Adams wanted to ride it out, let it happen, not allow worry to affect her. Them. Because people knowing could change things. It might even change how she was acting, a flaw she never seemed to conquer.
She might be a growing bird in a new nest, as Axel had poetically told her, but she wasn’t prepared to fly out into the open field of complete exposure. Not even with herroommates. Okay, so she could admit it wasn’t only about the project. It was abouther.
She understood better every day why Nanine did not want the others to know yet about her relationship with Brooke’s father. She was the same way. The feelings were all too big and new and life-changing. She didn’t know what was going to happen.
Every morning she got up and all she thought about was being with Axel. Like she was obsessed.
Her day planner even reflected the change. Her whole day planner seemed to revolve around Axel and the time she was giving him in her schedule. Since becoming Axel’s lover, she’d spent every day with him. They worked together. They slept together. She was finding it difficult to not stay the night, but if she took that final step, the cat would truly be out of the bag.
She fit her day job around him. Squeezed in extra time to spend with him after finishing a fashion meeting or writing an article she owed her editor. Gone were her nightly journaling and breathing exercises since she used that time to either catch up on work or text Axel if they hadn’t had dinner together…and more. Her yoga attendance had been sporadic, too, but she reasoned she was receiving the same benefits from their incredible sex.
And one thing was unassailable. He dominated her affirmations.
On Monday, she’d written:I allow myself to trust in my expanding emotions.
On Tuesday, she’d scribbled:I open myself up to more intimacy and grand adventures.
On Wednesday, she’d been in such a great hurry to meet him for a café—skipping yoga again, mind you—she’d only managed to jot down:Enjoy the moment.
Sure, it had only been over two weeks since their first date, and while she agreed time didn’t dictate feelings, peopleset their watches by it when it came to relationships. Normally that included her.
