Page 92 of Brooke
Her throat was aching along with her heart. “You think I like it?”
“And yet you are allowing it,” he said softly. “I do not want that, Brooke. For you or for us.”
“Why can’t you trust me to know what’s best for me?” She gave him a sharp look, knowing she had to keep focused or the hurt would swamp her. “I know my profession better than you. You talk about wanting to decide your own path for expansion without me helping. You’ve said I need to let you decide what’s best for your career, but you’re not letting me decide what’s best for mine. You can’t have it both ways, Axel.”
“We don’t seem to be hearing each other tonight.” He looked off again, his jaw a line of tension. “If we are to be partners, then there can be no presumptions. No secrets.”
She stiffened. “But you don’t want us to be partners. You just said you don’t want me to help you.”
“Because I want you to know I love you for you alone,” he shot back immediately. “I value your input?—”
“No, you don’t.” She stared up at him angrily. “Otherwise, you would listen to me. You only want your way. Well, I want mine too, dammit.”
He reached his hand out to her again, but she stepped out of reach, angry and anxious about their audience. Lowering his hand to his side, he shook his head sadly. “I cannot help but think we are both speaking to each other in ways determined from our past experiences. Perhaps it is better we have some time alone to sort out our thoughts so we can find the right words and remember what is truly in our hearts. Come. I’ll take you home.”
She could feel her legs start to tremble in her heels and pushed her feet to the ground to stop them. She could not fall apart. “I’m here for work, dammit. I have people I need to speak with. It would be rude of me to leave.”
When he stepped closer, blocking out the light completely, she could feel the warmth of his body, the one that normally made her feel so cherished. All she felt today was the stone wall between them.
“I do not wish to leave you alone, but I cannot stay longer as a courtesy to people I do not care anything about.” He blew out a harsh breath. “I wish you did not feel as you do, for it will make me ache to know you are suffering tonight going through the civilities you believe you must endure.”
The pain in her chest was spreading so quickly, she was sure she’d be suffocated by it. “I’ll be fine.”
“You tell yourself such lies,Elskede,when I wish you would not.”
Although his voice was gentle, parts of her burned: her heart, her throat, and her eyes.
“Brooke,” he said, so quietly she had to strain to hear, “the other lie I cannot tell is that we are not in a relationship. I love you.”
She bit her lip to stop its trembling. “I love you too, dammit,” she whispered.
“You think I do not understand your position,” he continued, holding her gaze, “but I do. I simply do not wish anyone to have that kind of power over my happiness with you. Or yours, for that matter, because your happiness is important to me. I will not keep my love for you secret, nor our relationship. If you wish something else, I fear our adventure is at an end.”
His hand touched her arm before she could step back, the barest of touches. Then he was gone, the only trace of his presence the spicy scent of pine from his cologne.
She wanted to curl forward at the waist from the pain. His words had sounded like an ultimatum. She pressed her hand to her diaphragm and forced her shoulders back. Right now was not the moment to fall apart.
She had eyes on her, not only cutthroats like Giulia who wished to see her fall, but ones whose respect mattered. Axel didn’t understand. In this, he was completely wrong, and she wasn’t sure she could get him to see things her way. Her heart began to break apart as she stalked back inside to do her job, a polite smile on her face.
Because Brooke Adams did not fall apart.
CHAPTER
TWENTY-ONE
Brooke didn’t want to get out of bed and that pissed her off more than anything.
Even her fight with Axel.
Today was Nanine’s reopening. The birds should be singing. She should be suggesting they all start their day with a glass of champagne to kick things off with a bang. Nanine would approve. She always said champagne in the morning was an act of pure joy.
Instead, she was cultivating anger as she sat up, because part of her wanted to wallow over the crushing ache filling every bone in her body. She’d heard boxers describe how they felt after a huge fight. If it was anything like this, she wondered why they didn’t choose a different profession. Because, God, it wasawful.
But it was better than giving in to the hurt and pressing her burning eyes into her pillow and going to pieces.
She and Axel might be done. Really and truly.
Her brain was still in shock. After coming home and sneaking upstairs—a decision she’d made because she couldn’t stand to screw up her friends’ moods on the eve ofNanine’s reopening—she’d gone over their fight a million times.
