Page 58 of Never the Bride
“I also had a guy who pulled out a giant janitor-style key ring from his tiny pocket, and his huge fingers were fighting for their life to get inside the pocket. I mean, who has that many keys? I don’t know, it turned me off, and I had to fake an excuse and leave.”
“These poor guys. No wonder men are scared to date in today’s world.”
“Oh, don’t act like you’ve never gotten the ick from a woman.”
“I haven’t.”
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not. I genuinely like women.”
“I like men.” A teasing smile spreads across my lips. “I just like them better when they don’t gross me out.”
“You’re not going to like me, then.”
So far, Hess gives me the opposite vibe. The more I’m around him, the more I like him. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the moment he does something that grosses me out, but it hasn’t happened yet, much to my dismay, which is why I’ve been avoiding him around the house. But if I knew what weird things he does, maybe I would be turned off, and the problem would be solved.
“What do you do that gives women the ick?”
“That’s the kind of stuff you have to find out organically throughout the marriage.” The corner of his mouth lifts, and it’s distractingly charming. “But in this relationship, you can’t leave. You’re stuck with me for the next five months, whether I give you the ick or not.”
What if he never gives me the ick? Must I suffer with this attraction the entire time we’re living together? That’s like handing a starving child a bag of Cheetos and telling them they can’t eat any.
It’s tough.
Real tough.
“Fine,” I sigh, feeling put out. “I’ll let your red flags develop naturally.”
“What about your red flags?”
“I don’t have any.”
“False.” His expression is serious. “You claim you hate my dog. That’s the biggest red flag of all.”
“Harvey? He slobbers all over everything. It’s disgusting.”
“He’s man’s best friend.”
“No, he’syourbest friend.”
“You know, you could use a few friends in your life.”
“Are you implying that I don’t have any friends?” I scoff.
“You work a lot.”
“Just because I work a lot doesn’t mean I don’t have time for friends.”
“Okay.” He shrugs as if he doesn’t quite believe me.
“I have friends.Goodfriends.” I sit up taller. “I grew up with them, and we’ve stayed close over the years. We even get together once a month for dinner just to catch up. Remember last week? I was out with them when I came home late.”
“So tell me about them.”
“Why, because you don’t believe me?”
“I’m just trying to get to know you better, remember?”
