Page 94 of One Foggy Christmas
“Um…”—Nash shifts uncomfortably in his chair—“that’s probably not necessary.”
My glare lands on him.
Nash isn’t who I’m mad at.
I’m mad at myself.
I don't know what would've happened if he hadn’t stopped things in the bathroom last night. Actually, I do...agiantmistake.
Everything is confusing right now, but kissing Nash is pretty straightforward. It feels good. I like it. It allows me to escape the murky mess in my mind—just forget about it all. So basically, I’m self-medicating my messed-up life with Nash’s lips. Something that’s not fair to him or to me.
“Why isn’t going to a gynecologist necessary?” There’s a bite behind my words that I’m not proud of.
“Probably because, a month before the accident, you had your IUD taken out.”
My head rears back. “Why would I do that? I love my IUD.”
He walks to me, grabs the jug of orange juice from my hand, refilling his glass. His eyes flick to mine. “Because we wanted to have a baby.”
The words carve a hole in my chest, hollowing me from the inside out.
Nervously, his gaze skips to my mom and then back to me. “You were going to track your cycle for a few months, and then we were going to hit it hard in Switzerland.” Uncomfortable awkwardness fills the room, especially after everything thattranspired last night. “That sounded bad.” He shakes his head, getting flustered. “Basically, we were trying to have a baby. That’s why you started your period unexpectedly.”
A baby?
I don’t know how I should feel.
I want to be a mother, but Stetson was always the dad in the plan. Replacing him with Nash is a blow my mind wasn’t prepared for this morning. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to fully wrap my head around that.
“I guess that explains that.” I force a tight, closed-lip smile and walk out of the room.
SADIE
“This is justa little something from our family to wish you Merry Christmas.” My mom hands a basket of baked goods to my dad’s secretary, Deborah.
“Oh, Lynette, you’ve outdone yourself.” She points to one of the candies wrapped in waxed paper. “Is this your famous caramel?”
My eyes drift around the space as the two women chat.
This was supposed to be my office. Deborah should be my secretary by now—another part of my life plan that didn’t play out how I wanted it to.
“Sadie?” My dad waves me into his office, keeping his hand on the door until I enter, then he shuts it. “I’m glad you came here today with your mother. I wanted to talk to you about business.”
Running my dad’s company was the dream. I worked for him all through high school and college, and that’s where my mind is still at, even today.
“This operation is small potatoes compared to what you and Nash built in Chicago.” He takes a seat in his massive leather chair behind his desk. “But we’re profitable and growing at a steady rate.”
“I don’t know what Nash and I built in Chicago.”
“That’s right.” He shakes his head, forgetting what I forgot. “Nash has told me a lot about it—about the locum tenens you introduced.”
“He has?”
“Yeah, he’s been down here a few times, comparing notes, sharing information. He knows his stuff.”
Why didn’t I know my dad and Nash were talking and hanging out? It’s not like Nash and I are constantly together. I guess it’s expected that he’d fill his empty days in Skaneateles with other stuff. I just didn’t think about it. In a lot of ways, Nash only exists when he’s with me, like a side character in a plot you only see when they’re in the scene with the main character.
“But as impressive as Nash is, I’ve been more impressed with what he’s told me about you and your ideas.”
