Page 99 of One Foggy Christmas
“Annie!” Lynette gasps. “What a terrible thing to say on Christmas Eve.”
“What?” She shrugs. “We’re all thinking it.”
Weareall thinking it.
I jump up from my spot on the couch. I can’t sit here any longer, pretending to watch a Bowl game.
“Maybe I’ll just drive around and see if I can find her.”
Jay sits up. “Do you want me to come with you?”
But I’m already at the door, grabbing my coat from the hook. “No, I’ll be back soon.”
The snow crunches under my feet as I rush to the car. I turn on the ignition, flipping the heater to full blast. My hands clutch the steering wheel, but I don’t move. I don’t know where to go to look for her.
Then I remember her cell phone. If Sadie has it with her, I should be able to see her location unless she turned it off sometime over the last month. I open the Find My app and pull up her device. She’s still in Skaneateles on Lane J. I shift the car into drive and head in that direction.
It takes about twelve minutes to get there. I turn onto Lane J and see her car parked down the street at a house. It’s not until I drive by that I recognize the place. Jay showed me a picture of it once before—a real estate property he and Lewis Roeshine purchased five years ago as a rental and then eventually as a home meant for Stetson and Sadie.
Now it’s just Stetson’s house.
The worst feeling rips through me, destroying my whole world.
Sadie is withhim.
My mind jumps to all kinds of conclusions as anger, hurt, jealousy, and pure anguish drag my heart in different directions. I want to knock on his door and demand answers or at least an explanation, but I don’t.
I turn my car around and leave, numbly driving until I find myself at the cemetery. The place is empty despite being Christmas Eve. A wreath and fake poinsettias sit at the foot of Tate’s grave. I stare blankly at his carved-out name, finally deciding to speak.
“I’m losing her,” I say out loud, the admission crushing my soul. “It’s happening right in front of me, and there’s nothing I can do about it.”
Silence.
“She looks at him the way she used to look at me.” Tears rush to my eyes, and I swear under my breath, blinking them away.
More silence.
“I love her—more than the day I married her. You don’t stop caring for someone just because they stop caring for you. And I’m scared I’ll stay in love with her the rest of my life even if she doesn’t love me back.” I clear my throat to hold off my growing emotion. A humorless laugh comes out with a grunt as I wipe a lone tear. “I’m sorry, man. I wanted to take care of Sadie for the rest of her life. Iplannedto take care of her forever.” I drop my shoulders in the saddest defeat. “I just wanted to let you know.”
SADIE
The sky dimsas I pull into my parents’ drive.
I lost track of time, not realizing it was almost five p.m.
I run to the side door when I see the back of Nash’s head. He sits beside the firepit, watching flames snap into the sky.
He’s waiting for me to come home.
Guilt sweeps through me like a tornado.
Slowly, I walk to him, building my case of defense with each step.
I sit down, hoping he’ll speak first, but he doesn’t say anything, and I know I have to start.
“Sorry, I lost track of time.”
His gaze shifts to me. “I miss you.” Sadness coats every single one of his features, tripling the guilt I thought I felt before. “Even though I’ve spent every day with you since the accident, I stillmissyou. I miss the way we were.”
