Page 124 of Filthy Little Pretties
The drive goes by fast, mainly because I’m lost in my head on autopilot as I pull up in front of the boathouse. Tossing my keys into the duffle that’s in the back seat, I hang it over my back as I push out of my car, taking in a deep breath. The water is still, beautiful, home. It’s a perfect day to row out. Staring down at the pavement, I walk, only glancing up a few times, still stuck in my head. Fuck, I feel so goddamn defeated. I can’t fix this for her or for me. I don’t even know what I would say to him if he gave me the opportunity. My hand reaches for the door, and I yank it open, not paying attention to anything around me as I enter.
Wait, why the fuck is the door open? I should’ve had to unlock that.
A loud thud jars me, just as I lift my head to see Liam standing ten feet away. His bag’s plopped at his feet as he glares at me. “What the fuck are you doing here, Grey?”
I drop my own on the benches along the wall and let out an empty laugh. “What does it look like?”
He bends, snatching his duffle off the floor, jaw tensed, anger marring his features as he starts toward the door. “Whatever. I’m leaving. This is all yours, too.”
Too.Motherfucker. I step in front of the door, blocking it from him and shaking my head, as my words tumble out angrily. “This is what we’re going to do now, Liam? Every time we see each other, you’re going to act like a fucking toddler and play hide-and-seek?”
He takes a step back, running his hand over his head. “Fuck you, Grey.” Clapping his hands together hard, he begins jumping in place, loosening up his muscles before squaring off to me. “Fine. You want to do this. Right now?” He holds his fists up, ready to brawl. “Let’s go. But you won’t get lucky and get through this fight with just a bruise on your jaw.”
“Liam!” I bellow. “Are you fucking kidding me with this? I’m not fighting you, dickhead. I want to apologize and put this shit behind us.”
He throws his arms in the air, scoffing at what I’m saying, but I don’t stop, my chest rising harder as my voice roars from my throat.
“Quit pouting and act like a man. Get the fuck over it!”
“Goddammit!” he growls, colliding his fist into the wall. He slaps his other hand against it a few times before turning to look at me. “You got the fucking girl who you don’t deserve, and no matter how hard you try, you’ll never…fucking…deserve her. I don’t want your apology, Grey. I want you to walk away. Do the right thing by her.”
What the fuck? All the words feel slow to process. Walk away? Why the hell would he ever think I would do that? He has to know I’ll never do that.
My brows draw together as I stare at him. “No. Never.”
He takes a few steps toward me. Hurt, anger, desperation cling to his features. My eyes search his, hoping for some kind of acknowledgement that he knows what he’s asking is impossible or unreasonable, but all I see is contempt.
“Liam…you can’t ask that of me.”
“Then I’ll race you for it,” he rushes out, pointing to the boats.
“What?” I can’t help myself as a shocked laugh leaves my body as I ask it.
“I’ll fucking race you—for her. Not like a trophy…butfor her. You win, and I’ll shut the fuck up and wait until you mess it up, then I’ll scrape her off the floor and try and put her back together… I win, and you walk away. Let her hate you because she should. She deserves better.”
A long exhale leaves me as I run my hands through my hair, turning around. Everything he’s saying feels like a punch to the fucking gut. The kid I grew up with—the one I consider a brother—fucking hates me. That much is clear. My mind is scrambling as I look out to the boats and then back at him. I almost can’t believe I say what I do.
“Okay.”
His eyes falter for a second, before he regains his composure. I don’t think he thought I would agree either. We stand staring for a beat more before turning and gearing up without a sound.What the fuck am I doing? What is he doing? He’ll never beat me, he knows that.
Neither of us even change, keeping our sweats on as we grab our individual oars and sculls. He takes the far left of the dock, and I take the right, as we walk down to the river, tension compounding between us.
“From the tree to the bridge,” he calls out, pointing out the parameters.
I nod, then say back flatly, “I qualified for the Olympic rowing team. I didn’t tell you. Guess I probably should have. But you should know that going in.”
Seems only fair.
His mouth drops open to say something, then shuts as he looks down for a moment. When his head lifts, I see the same determined and stubborn guy I’ve known my whole life.
“Then I should be taken straight onto the team once I beat you.”
A part of me wishes you could beat me.Then I wouldn’t feel like such an asshole right now, knowing that I’m going to win her a second time. Lowering down, we lock our oars in and row out, almost side by side.Fuck, stop this shit, Grey.
“We don’t have to do this, Liam,” I call out over the few feet that separate us.
We slow as we approach our starting line, letting the boats get evened out, and Liam looks at me. “Yes, I do. You shouldn’t have her.”And you should? Fuck that.
