Page 72 of Female Fantasy
And then the riptide in my mind quiets, and all becomes clear.
When two come together to form one body, for fleeting seconds, they combine souls.
Power sharing.
I know what I have to do.
I take the first prong of the pitchfork and use its sharp edge to slice a thin line in my wrist. Red droplets immediately start to bead at the wound.
“Ryke,” I whisper, caressing his cheek.
“Mm-hm?”
“I want you to kill me.”
Chapter Fourteen
Even on a clear night in New York City, you can’t see the stars. The buildings are too bright and blinding, lit up like Christmas trees no matter the hour of the night. Fluorescence drowns out the Milky Way, overshadows the constellations that I know hang above. Then there’s the air pollution, a general fog of man-made mist. The air feels heavier here, nothing like the uplifting breeze that wafts in from the Mystic River. Back home, inhaling feels like taking a dip in the Atlantic Ocean right after sunrise—crisp and refreshing.
A constant state of renewal.
The view from Angel’s roof, however, is breathtaking. To the west, I can see the tip of the Freedom Tower, lit up in holiday colors. Bridges connecting Brooklyn to Lower Manhattan arch over the East River. Fort Greene park, stretching over several city blocks, the trees barren and the grass yellowed.New York feels almost peaceful from above. Organized chaos. I could manage a city like this if I were to lurk above it, like Merriah when she first arrives in Atlantia. Floating in an air bubble above everything.
I hear footsteps behind me.
Without turning around, I already know who it is.
Who decided to follow me after I escaped upstairs after dinner.
“Your friends are nice,” Nico says.
He joins me, our hands inches apart on the railing as we look out at the city.
“They understand me,” I tell him. “Angel, Roy, Kalli…we fell in love with each other when we were just pixels on a screen. They interact with my work. We theorize together. I share pieces of myself with them, details of my life that I could never trust anyone else with. I know it sounds weird, but sometimes I swear they know how my brain works better than I do. But for some odd reason, I was still…I don’t know. Nervous to meet them in person? I was so worried I’d disappoint them somehow. Or that they’d disappoint me. And I couldn’t stand to lose them. Not after what happened with Sam. Not after…”
The way I lost you, is what I don’t say.
“So I guess I just clung to this romanticized idea of them rather than take a chance on the reality.” I bite back a laugh. “Turns out they’re even better in person. What a waste, huh?”
“They’re your Upper Shoal,” Nico says, his voice sheepish.
My response is a single raised brow.
“I’ve been reading.A Tale of Salt Water and Secrets, I mean. There are no apocalypses or zombies or anything in it, but it’s not half bad. You might be onto something.”
My belly does a cartwheel.
“Wow, what a compliment. Not half bad.”
“Okay, fine. It’s good. Really good. Great, even. I just got to that part where Merriah wields the trident from the treasure trove. The way she boils those dudes alive and they totally explode? It was fucking badass.”
I can’t help myself. “Even though it’s a stupid romance?”
Nico’s posture stiffens. When he moves to face me, his expression is solemn.
“I never should have said those things to you, Joonie,” he says. “First of all, you were right.ATOSAShas much more to offer than people give it credit for. ThanIgave it credit for. Yeah, the tension between those two is hot, don’t get me wrong, but that’s not all. I get it now. It’s really a book about healing. About Merriah learning to trust herself, to master her power and understand her own strength. Her relationship with Ryke is obviously an important part of that, and I shouldn’t have been so quick to dismiss it. I can see how much her story has impacted you. In more ways than one.”
I pretend to be distracted by a passing plane. “Because I proved I how to escape from restraints and steal a car?”
