Page 13 of Snowbound with the Earl
Four
She supposed she’ddeserved that, Noelle thought as Graham closed the library door behind him. She’d hurt him, and clearly, even a decade later, the wound was still raw. She hadn’t wanted to hurt him, but she hadn’t had a say in the matter. He didn’t want to hear about how much she herself had been hurt. In his mind, she should have made a different choice.
He couldn’t possibly know how many thousands of times she’d wished she had chosen him.
She yanked the drapes closed again and pulled her knees against her chest, trying to ease her shivering. Even in this, her warmest gown, she was freezing. Somehow the cold of the window hadn’t bothered her as much before Graham had walked into the room. Or perhaps her trembling was only due partly to the freezing temperatures outside. Perhaps what she was really feeling was the sting of his rejection. She’d been telling herself the same story ever since Eva had invited her to this house party. She’d said she would be cordial but distant with Evergreen. She’d told herself she no longer had feelings for him. She’d almost convinced herself that she didn’t want him anymore.
But as soon as he’d strolled into the foyer, she’d known she’d lied to herself. Of course, she still wanted him. She’d come to this house party hoping to reconcile, eager to disregard their past and pick up where they’d left off.
What a fool she was. Graham didn’t want to reconcile. He would never forgive her for what she’d done, and now she’d have to accept that. She stifled a sob. She wouldnotcry. She also need not stay here and watch him court Miss Halifax. Out of affection for her hostess, Noelle would stay the rest of this day, but she’d tell Swift and her coachman to be prepared to leave first thing tomorrow. After dinner tonight, she’d let Eva know she had decided to leave. Then Graham could enjoy the last couple of days without having to endure her odious presence. In the meantime, she would steer well clear of him.
She left the library and encountered Miss Rummage in the foyer.
“Lady Bonneville,” Miss Rummage said with a smile. “I did not see you at breakfast.”
Noelle held up her book. “I was not very hungry and stole an hour in the library.”
“Next time you shall have to let me know of your plans. I would have joined you.”
Noelle nodded. Undoubtedly, Miss Rummage would have found the events in the library this morning far more interesting than whatever occurred at breakfast. “Are you going up to change for the day’s outing?”
“Mama told me to fetch my mittens and pelisse. Lord Dorsey says the temperature outside has dropped since yesterday.”
“I can well believe it. I won’t keep you.”
Miss Rummage continued up the stairs, passing Swift as she descended with Noelle’s outerwear. Eva led several other guests into the foyer. Noelle quickly turned her attention to Swift as she spotted Graham among the group. He had his greatcoat draped over his arm.
“Dress in your warmest clothing,” Lady Dorsey instructed. “With the snowfall and the freezing temperatures, the weather is perfect for building a snowman, but you will enjoy it more if you are bundled up.”
Noelle nodded to the others as they started up the stairs to fetch their outerwear. As Swift finished helping Noelle into her bright red pelisse, Eva grabbed her arm affectionately. “You look perfect. I will be right back.” She hurried upstairs and Noelle dismissed Swift.
She immediately regretted it. As soon as her maid departed, Noelle realized only she and Graham were left in the entryway. He finished donning his greatcoat, glanced at her, and looked away again. Noelle made a point of studying the tiles beneath her feet, tracing the lines of the marble with one booted toe. She held both mittens in one hand, but as she adjusted her grip, one mitten dropped to the floor and slid on the sleek marble toward Graham. He spotted it, looked at her, then bent to retrieve it. Silently, he handed it back to her.
“Thank you,” she murmured, not meeting his eyes. She was mortified. She was far too old to employ the debutant’s trick of dropping her glove so a gentleman would retrieve it for her. She hadn’t been doing that at all. The mitten had dropped on accident, but he probably thought she was playing flirtatious games with him.
After what seemed an eternity, Mrs. Edmonton and her daughter descended the stairs, followed by Lord Jersey. Noelle immediately complimented the ladies on their stylish pelisses while Jersey went to speak to Graham about whatever it was men discussed. Finally, the entire party was assembled. Lord Dorsey led them outside and, as Noelle was toward the back of the group, she couldn’t help but see Miss Halifax standing beside Graham. Of course, he offered his arm to escort her. It was the gentlemanly thing to do, but perhaps it was also what he’d been wanting to do. He’d made it quite clear in the library that he wasn’t sitting around hoping to reconcile with Noelle. Perhaps he had decided to court Miss Halifax.
Mr. and Mrs. Halifax walked behind the couple and exchanged a meaningful glance. So they were happy about a potential match there. Why wouldn’t they be? Graham was an earl. If their eldest daughter married him, their other children would benefit from the connection. Miss Halifax had mentioned yesterday that she had three sisters. No doubt she, as the eldest, was under a great deal of pressure to secure an advantageous match. Ending her first Season without any offers must have been a blow.
“May I?” Mr. Swinton offered Noelle his arm. Noelle smiled at him and took it. Swinton was one of Dorsey’s closest friends. To hear them tell it, the two had grown up almost as brothers. Swinton was a very amiable gentleman—always ready to play billiards or shinty with the men or dance with a lady or push her sledge. Noelle did not know the man well, but Eva had once said he was her biggest matchmaking failure. She had tried to match him with more ladies than she could count on one hand, and while he’d been cordial and solicitous of each lady in turn, he’d never shown any real interest beyond friendship.
As Swinton led her onto the snow-covered drive, he leaned down to speak so only Noelle could hear. “I see Lord Foster is accompanying Miss Edmonton.”
Noelle craned her neck to catch sight of the couple. “And? Foster does not give me the impression that he is ready to marry.”
“Oh, he’s said as much,” Swinton acknowledged. “But I do think he has some affection for Miss Edmonton. Do you think she could change his mind?”
Noelle glanced at Graham and Miss Halifax. “I believe once a man’s mind is made up, he is generally quite unmovable.”
