Page 109 of Show Me How
Even if the safest alternative would have been to leave this room and take a few minutes to gather ourselves instead. Yet here we are, still close, and pretending that when it comes time for me to choose where to go, I’m not going to be begging him to tell me to stay.
32
SHADE
I can’t stop lookingat her.
It’s taking everything in me not to storm across the studio, bend her over that desk she keeps hiding behind, and take her the way I’ve been thinking about for the last week straight. Soft to start, careful as I work my cock inside before grinding deep. She’d moan my name, and I’d curse hers against her throat, her shoulders, or her mouth.
I’m so far past losing my mind. It’s already gone, and now she’s chipping away at my rib cage, determined to rip my heart clean out of my chest and shove it into her tiny pink purse. I grind my teeth and continue flicking through this week’s photos on my camera, not paying attention to a single one of them.
They’re a blur, a distraction.
“Can I ask you something?”
My entire body tenses at the sound of her voice. She hasn’t spoken since the last client of the day left, andfuck! How could I have missed it after only an hour?
“Go for it,” I grunt.
A tense pause. “Could I host the first book club meeting upstairs? And don’t feel pressured to say yes. It’s your place. Iknow I’m just a guest here, and I’d never want to put you out or make you feel uncomfortable?—”
“Yes,” I blurt, my voice rough. Clearing my throat, I add, “You can have it upstairs.”
“We can? You’re sure?”
The happiness in those four words shoots through me like adrenaline, lighting me up on the inside. It’s painful to hide how pleased it makes me to know I’ve made her feel that way.
“You’re not just a guest. Make your plans without worrying about my approval, Millie.”
Just one look. I can take justonedamn look at her without . . . My heart hammers viciously when she stares right back. The soft gleam in those pools of blue keeps me locked in place, something so raw and desperate gnawing at the walls of my stomach.
“Thank you, Shade. I just wasn’t sure you’d be okay with a half-dozen women filling your apartment with sparkling wine and finger foods. If that spread around town, you could lose your ‘playboy’ reputation,” she teases, smirking.
I swallow to wet my dry throat. “I’m not a playboy.”
“What are you, then?”
There’s a beat of silence before I force myself to speak, dropping my gaze back to my camera. “I’ve never wanted a relationship. They’re complicated. There’s no time for complicated in my life.”
“Relationships are only complicated if you want them to be.”
“Is that your professional opinion?” I ask, attempting to hide the frustration that keeps bleeding into my voice. “You have less relationship experience than I do.”
“I’ve read about plenty.”
“The whole point of fiction is that it isn’t reality.”
The wheels of her chair roll across the floor as I keep clicking through photos. “Maybe you should take part in the book club meeting. You could learn a thing or two.”
“I’m not going to turn into a romance novel fan, Mills.”
“Have you ever even had a girlfriend?”
It’s a struggle not to groan when she doesn’t let it go. “How did we get on this topic?”
“It doesn’t matter. I’m genuinely curious.”
“I’ve had a few. And like I said, they were too complicated.”
