Page 64 of Becoming His Perfect Daddy
Ironically, the second I’d given up on men, on dating, on love, Sam had whisked his way into my life and taken my breath away. I’d only met him in person three times, but each time I had, I liked him more. Sure, he wasn’t who I’d always pictured myself with, but that was probably a good thing. Especially when the types of guys I picked were usually assholes.
Sam wasn’t an asshole. Not even close.
I was.
The thought hit me out of nowhere.Shit.I’d been an absolute jerk to him, hadn’t I? I’d accused him of stalking me more than once, yelled at him in this very club. He hadn’t deserved any of that.
After processing Sam’s multiple confessions in that email—one of which being that he was in love with me, and what the fuck did I do to deserve that?—I’d found myself more intrigued than upset. And yet, I couldn’t muster the courage to email, message, or call him back.
He deserved better than that, too.
God, I’d fucked this all up. At the very least, I owed him a huge apology. If he’d even accept it.
Tears burned at the back of my eyes at the thought. Sam was too good for me, too patient. I didn’t deserve him. He needed someone less unhinged. He deserved so much better than me.
“Cameron?”
I blinked away the tears before they fell and turned to Tris. “Hm?”
He took one look at my expression and shifted to face me directly. “Okay, it’s time for you to talk.”
I opened my mouth to make an excuse, but my best friend put his hand in the air between us to stop me.
“Nope. Spill. Now.”
I sighed. “Sam deserves better than me.”
Tristan’s mouth fell open. “Okay, where the hell didthatcome from? Last I heard, Sam emailed you to tell you he was S.M.C. I thought you were upset about that all this time—how did you get here from there?”
I swiped at my stuffy nose with the back of my hand. I was losing the battle against my tears. “Every time we met, I tore into him for no reason. I yelled at him more than once, Tris. He didn’t deserve that.”
Tristan was quiet for a moment as his eyes appraised me. I fidgeted in my seat when he stared too long, saw too much. “Probably not. But I think you’re selling yourself short, Cammy.”
I frowned. “How?”
“Okay, pay attention.” He turned even more in his seat, settling in with a leg bent in front of him so he could face me head-on. “First, Sam is so into you, it’s not even funny. The man admitted to beingin love with youwhen there was a very real chance you’d never want to speak to him again.” I hadn’t let Tris read the email because it was so personal, but I’d given him thehighlights. “Second, you two have mad chemistry. Remember the coffee shop? And I saw you at the club meeting—you could barely keep your hands off each other.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but again, he cut me off.
“It wasn’t anything inappropriate, of course. But you were drawn to each other like magnets. One of you always had to be touching the other all night.”
He fell silent so I could process his words. Wehaddone that, hadn’t we?
Tristan grinned. “So now you’re getting it.”
I gaped. “I . . . uh, I’m . . .”
He nodded, his smile widening. “Exactly. Think of it from his perspective: He was enamored of you before you even met. So much so that he emailed you to tell you how much your books meant to him. Then the universe kept pushing you two together. He must’ve thought all his dreams were coming true.”
“Exactly,” I interjected, “and then I yelled at him. Repeatedly.”
Tristan rolled his eyes. “You think he cares about that? I saw the sheer joy on that man’s face when you introduced him to us. He wouldn’t have sent that email confessing everything if he didn’t want you.” He took a breath. “Look, the man loves you. You may not be there yet, and that’s fine. But don’t let him get away because you’re scared.”
“I’m not—”
“Yes, you are, Camster. I love you, but you can be a little thick-headed sometimes and let your fear call the shots. You need to get out of your own way. If we’re lucky, we only get a chance at true, all-encompassing love once in our lives—maybe a couple of times, if we’rereallylucky. Don’t let this one pass you by because you think he deserves better. He probably thinks the same about you.”
I sucked in a breath, his words hitting me between the eyes. Most of us struggled with feeling good enough; that was justhuman nature. God knew, no one was perfect. But we could love each other in spite of—or because of—our imperfections. That’s what real love was.
