Page 35 of Crash and Burn
17
Marley
“You don’t look like a Cameron.”I smirk at Rascal. “But I like it.”
“Yeah?” He pulls me into him. “Well, I like you.”
I put my hands on his chest. “Stop. We can’t do this. This,” I say gesturing between the two of us. “Can’t happen.”
“Why the hell not?”
“I won’t be here forever. As soon as the coast is clear, I’m headed east,” I tell him.
“Stay, for me.”
“I know your reputation. You’re not a one woman man, Rascal. You’ll get tired of me within a month and move on to the next.”
“It’s not like that,” he states. “You’re nothing like any of the women I’ve been with.”
“It doesn’t matter. I’ve heard it all before.”
“Not from me. Marley, give me a chance.” He’s all but begging at this point. He grabs my hand, gazing into my eyes. “Do me a favor and at least think about it?”
I nod. “I can do that.”
Rascal slides his hand onto the side of my neck. With a light squeeze, he pulls me closer, bringing his lips to mine. I sigh into his mouth, giving him entrance to assault my tongue with his. I slowly pull away and he lets out a soft growl against my mouth.
“I’m sorry. I had to get one more kiss in, in case it’s our last,” he admits. He lets go of me, walking to the door. “I’ll be waiting for your answer.”
As soon as the door closes behind him, I flop onto my bed. “Ugh!”
How can one person make me feel so many emotions at one time? I want to give Rascal a chance. While I’ve met my fair share of playboys, I’ve never met a guy who lights a fire in me quite like he does. He is so arrogant, but today he showed me a more vulnerable side. I never would have guessed he could be vulnerable. At the same time, I’m terrified of how he makes me feel.
It’s been years since I’ve had a serious relationship. I’m not sure I even know how to be in one. Maybe we could have a friends with benefits relationship. That I can do no problem. The question is, would that be enough for either of us. Exhaustion washes over me and the demons I’ve been battling come crawling out of their caves. With all the bullshit life has thrown at me, it’s no surprise I have depression. It comes in waves. Some days it’s crippling and some I can beat the demons back into their caves. Today it’s somewhere in between.
You’re not worthy of any love or affection he might be able to give you,the demons tell me.He only wants you for sex. He’ll get tired of you and pass you on to someone else.
They’re right. I’m damaged goods. Why would anyone want someone who has already been used and abused the way I have. Damaged. Goods. I crawl under the blankets and succumb to the darkness, sleeping away my feelings.
A couple hours later, I’m woken up by my phone buzzing. It’s a text from Minx.
From Minx:Haven’t seen you all day. Wanted to make sure you’re okay.
To Minx:Not feeling well. I think I drank too much last night.
From Minx:Been there. Feel better. Let me know if you need anything.
I toss my phone on the side table. With the demons still lurking close, I climb out of bed, grab some clean clothes and head for the bathroom to take a warm bath. Turning the water on to let the tub fill up, I grab one of my favorite Lush bath bombs, Turmeric Latte. It’s such a warm, relaxing and moisturizing bath bomb. I toss it in when the bath is half-full. Once the bath is filled, I toss my hair on top of my head, strip my clothes off and step in, slowly lowering myself into the water. A calmness washes over me.I need to do this more often, I think to myself.
Fifteen minutes later, my phone dings with a text.
From Tink:Are you in your room? I have wine and need to talk.
To Tink:I’m in the bath but come on in.
From Tink:Be there in five.
She comes barging into my room exactly five minutes later and straight to the bathroom.
