Page 63 of Hysteria Rises
My jaw tightens at the sound of his pleasure-filled pants and my trembling hand slips down my soap-slickened abdomen. Every inch of the descent toward my dick carries the inherent risk of stumbling further into madness. The mental image of Cross stroking his thick cock takes over all rational thought, setting my blood to roaring through my veins. I can’t hold back any longer. My fingers curl around my dick, and I give myself a leisurely tug. Stop. Listen.Groan. I wet mylips as I tighten my grip, shuttling my fist from base to tip and swiping over the slit to collect the pre-cum.
He’s right. Fucking. There. I know what he’s doing, and perhaps even headier, he knows what I’m doing, too. My eyes practically roll back in my head. This is intense, dangerous behavior. Yet something about it being forbidden only makes it all that much hotter. Not only is masturbation a no-no, itdefinitelyis prohibited the night before the Hunting. Both of us will be corrected if we’re caught.Fuck. My chest jerks as I hold my dick in one hand and grasp my balls with the other. I’m breathing hard now. So hard, I know he must hear what I’m doing. And I wonder if listening to me does anything for him. “We shouldn’t be doing this,” I mutter. Forget all the other stuff, in the Collective’s eyes, homosexual behavior is just plain wrong. This flies in the face of how this society is set up.
“I don’t fucking care,” he mutters, ragged exhalations being torn from his lips as we continue on. “Don’t stop,” he rasps.
I bite down on my lip, and finally give up the fight, stroking the hard length of my erection in earnest now. In my mind’s eye, I see him in the next stall. No more than a few feet away. Fuck. My eyes slam shut. Maybe we’re even leaning against the same fucking wall. At that thought, my heart rate spikes, and my breath catches as I let a low groan slip past my lips and work myself faster and faster, racing blindly toward a precipice, ready to fucking free fall right into hell for what we’re doing.
This society of our fathers’ making—it isn’t normal. I know it isn’t. But does he? He has to understand perfectly well the risk he’s taking. Since birth, he’s been taught a particular set of rules, been led to believe that the way life is lived here is the gold fucking standard. For them, the Hunting has one purpose: to impregnate their women. There are strict guidelines surrounding itandwhat else we do with our cocks. The night before that crazed ritual is not the time for sexual shenanigans. Especially not for two of the heirs to this commune. My jaw tightens. He might just be fucking insane. So, there’s that.
I heave out a breath, pausing to run my thumb over the head of my dick. I wish it were his fucking hand on me. For several X-rated seconds, I imagine it is. That alone has me gritting my teeth, a surge of desire so sharp it hurts ripping into me.
We haven’t ever been friends. Cross is too fucking intense, too smart for his own fucking good. He gets on my last nerve. He’s making me lose my fucking mind because I think about him in ways that could get me in the worst kind of trouble. He knows exactly what he’s doing. I hate that he knows me in this way. There’s no doubt in my mind what would happen if anyone found out the thoughts that run through my head. I hate that he was right when he said he knew I watched him. I do. But right this very second, all I fucking want is to indulge in my most secret desires. In the headiness of this stolen, secret moment, while myhead is mixed-up and my body aroused, all I want ishim.
A moment later, a low moan echoes through the room.
“Cross,” I groan softly, then immediately cringe, hoping my vigorous movements and the splashing of the water hides that his name ever passed my lips. My balls are so fucking heavy with the need to come, I can hardly think straight, and I wonder if he heard me or if I got away with it.
“Yeah, baby boy?” he grunts out a moment later. My cheeks flame with heat. His grit-filled voice is like a lightning strike to my dick. I see him clearly. Working his shaft, the tattoos on his forearm move almost as if they’re alive. Water flows over dips and planes of hard muscle, sluice down powerful legs, and drip from his erect cock. And more than anything else, it’s that taunting smirk on those full lips of his that gets me.
My balls draw up, and I pant. With each stroke of my hand, I edge closer to oblivion.
“Hearing your ragged breath makes my blood race. Fuck—” The catch of his voice has my shaking legs perilously close to giving out. Orgasm. Imminent.
Cum rockets from my dick as I unload, imagining what it’d be like if he were in here. With me. I let out a choked sound as Cross moans in unison.
“I know you, Kai. Whether you want me to or not.”
NEW MOON
THIRTY-THREE
ARROW
I hazarda glance back toward the main room of the women’s quarters as I slowly approach Twenty-three’s door. Today is the first time I’ve felt physically able to move around without pain sending me to my knees. I dread the return to my dailies… and the idea of a sprint through the woods for the Hunting in just shy of a day’s time? Well, I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say it might kill me.
I haven’t been down here since my correction, but I really, really need to see my siren. I’ve been agonizing over when I’d be able to see her again. If anyone knew I was down here, it’d lead to certain disaster. I pivot on my heel, quickly checking one more time to make sure no one is watching my actions before I draw the key to Twenty-three’s room from my pocket and fit it into the lock.
Once I’m inside her darker-than-sin room, I close the door and lean back against it. Searching blindly forthe object of my obsession, I blink until my eyes finally acclimate. She’s right where she should be, curled up on the bed under her blanket. My heart hammers relentlessly in my chest, picking up speed. I haven’t seen her in days, and now the proximity is reeling me in. And she’s so close but so far. I need to be right there with her, want to climb into the bed behind her and?—
I jerk myself free of those thoughts. The last time I listened to the dangerous desires flowing through my bloodstream, look where it got us. Dragging in a cautious breath, I ease farther into the room, only stopping when I reach her bedside. On my knees, my eyes skim over her hardly distinguishable features. It doesn’t matter that I can’t see her very well. I know she’s there, and it makes my need for her intensify like a thousand suns beating down on me.
“What are you doing?” Her sleep-heavy voice reaches right inside the aching cavern of my chest and twists. I freeze, hovering close at her bedside. “Is it morning?”
My lips part, and I ease closer. Close enough that I can see the faint glitter of her blue eyes. Close enough that her warm breath reaches me. I shudder with the intense longing that races through my veins. “No. It’s not.”
She shifts away, and it’s as vicious as a slap.
Blinking in the dark, I can just make out her frown. “I don’t—” Rubbing a hand over my jaw, I sigh. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
“You shouldn’t be here.” Anxious eyes flick toward the door.
Thud. Thud. Thud.The heavy beating in my chest would send me to my knees if I wasn’t already there. “I couldn’t help myself. I needed to see you.” I shake my head.
“Why would you risk it?” She works her jaw to the side. “Tell me I’m wrong. You either haven’t been down here like the others have because of what they did to you or because they told you not to.” She pauses, scanning my face. “Which is it?”
Slowly, I roll over her question in my head. “I don’t care about my pain. I deserved it.”
The gasp of dismay that leaves her sweet lips warms my insides the way nothing much has lately. I lift a hand, glad for the darkness so that hopefully she misses the way it shakes. I cup her cheek, and she flinches at first, but I manage to rasp, “That wasn’t the worst of what they did to me. The worst was hurting you, keeping me from you.”
