Page 61 of This Is Love
When her body ceases its undulations, we finally remove our hands from her. Rya is quiet, completely blissed out as I give Logan a devious smirk, lift my hand, and slide my cum-covered fingers between his lips. He moans, and it’s this heady, desperate-for-me sound that makes me believe I’m exactly where I’m meant to be—with them, the only two people I’ll ever need the way I’ve come to needthem.
I slip my fingers from his mouth and pat his cheek. “Good boy. Now, I think you should go get a warm washcloth for our girl.”
He huffs out a laugh at the praise, then kisses Rya softly. “Good idea. Be right back with that.”
I’d disentangledmyself from Rya and Logan not long after, because we all needed something to drink and food, and Rya definitely needed some ibuprofen—just in case. We’d made a picnic of everything I found in my mini fridge and food stash. Rya had practically chugged the Gatorade and inhaled a protein bar, a piece of string cheese, and a handful of nuts.Note to self:I need to talk to Logan about whether offering her snacks is going to help or hurt.Because the last thing I want to do is upset her. Not when she’s already in a state about what happened in class. Then again, I don’t want her fainting at the drop of a hat, either. Tough call.
And ranking right up there in the not-my-finest-moment-of-this-RA-gig department, after Rya had cleaned up in my bathroom—two guys, twice the mess—the three of us had snuck into the men’s communal bathroom to shower. More and more I’m discovering there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to take care of our girl. So,fuck it. Maybe I’d feel differently if we’d gotten caught, but no one had come in while we were cleaning up, and we made it back to my room without seeing a soul.
We’re all but knocked out when Rya shifts, jostling me awake with her movement. “Jaxon?” Rya whispers, “are you still awake?”
I open one eye, squinting at her. “Yeah. Kinda.”
“Sorry.” She grimaces.
“’S’okay. What’s up?” I mumble.
Logan peers at us from the corner of his eye but says nothing. He’s waiting, though, for her to spill whatever she’s got on her mind, I can tell. And the thing is, even a few weeks ago, I’d probably have told him to fuck off and give us a minute since the question is clearly for me. But now there’s been a shift inside me, and I need him to stay.Wanthim here. Because he’s part of whatever the fuck we’re building together.
She takes a deep breath before letting the question tumble from her. “What was it you were going to tell me over the phone earlier but then decided against?”
My chest heaves on my inhaled breath. I was hoping she’d forget about that. When I open my mouth, all that comes out is an odd ragged sound that definitely won’t pass as an answer.
Logan raises his head and turns it to peer into my eyes. “She needs to know. Now, more than ever.”
I blink at him, wondering how he even knows what I was going to say, but from the look in his eyes, there’s not much chance he’s incorrect. Chewing on the corner of my lip for a few seconds, I nod at him, then prop myself up on my elbow to give Rya all my focus. My heart slams around inside my chest cavity, and I consider clamming up again. But then I know Logan is right—he usually is where she’s concerned—and she fucking deserves to hear this from me. Because man, have I been feeling it. “I just wanted to say”—I cup her face in my palm, sliding my thumb over her lip—“I fucking love you, pretty girl.” My voice is gritty and raw to my ears, but I got it out. And I promptly stop breathing as she stares at me.
“Oh.” She blinks rapidly, then surges to a sitting position and turns to face me. She glances back at Logan, who puts his hand on her back. My brow furrows. Reassuring her, maybe? She takes a deep breath as he nods at her, then swivels back around. She reaches for my hand where it lays on my chest. “I-I love you, too, Jaxon. I didn’t know…” Her voice trails off.
“What didn’t you know?” My brow raises on my forehead, waiting breathlessly for whatever she intends to say next. It doesn’t matter what it is. It doesn’t change how I feel.
Her brows hitch together. “I wasn’t sure if you were… ready?” she questions with her head cocked to the side.
I pick up her hand, pressing the back of it to my lips. “You’ve drawn me in, taken me past the point of sanity with the way I love you.” My eyes flick to Logan’s. “I feel that way”—the words almost get stuck, but I look into his blue eyes, knowing it’s true—“about both of you.”
Logan blinks, wide-eyed wonder dawning over his features. He takes in one breath, then another, then gives himself a little shake as he wrenches his gaze from mine.
It has my heart stopping dead in my chest. “I—” I don’t even have a thought in my head as to what I thought I was going to say. Panic claws at my throat, and I stare down at the bedding between us where Rya had been lying. My ears ring, and I feel fucking dizzy. Somehow, I misread the situation. This relationship. Everything. I fucked up.
But then, Logan’s hand is on the back of my neck, steering my face to his. I was so lost in the spiral I’d almost gone down that I missed that he’d moved. “I love you, too, Jax.” He presses his lips firmly to mine. Unrelenting. Like he means it.
When we finally pull apart, Rya flops down between us again. “That was so damn beautiful. You both make me so happy.”
And I swear to fuck, it’s not ten seconds later this girl is sound asleep. I press a kiss to her neck as I curl myself around her, then reach over her body to take Logan’s hand. Smiling at me, he holds it, rubbing his thumb over the back of it.
I don’t understand how we got here. But I’m so fucking glad we did.
30
LOGAN
Hurrying back to the dorm,I smile inwardly, every moment of last night playing through my head in dizzying, fantastic detail—both the physical activities and the proclamations of love. We wore each other the fuck out. And then we’d stunned the shit out of ourselves. Where I’m concerned, I’ve loved Rya forever… but it’d felt right to admit to Jaxon that I had those feelings for him, too. Because I do. There’s something tethering us together, and it’s not just the heat between us. Anddefinitelynot the pseudo-familial bond. I’ve come to depend on him. To care what he thinks.
And, poor guy, he’d truly thought for a few moments I was shooting him down.
I’ve never seen such relief on anyone’s face before when I finally admitted how I felt. Kinda makes my head spin to think he was the first to say it, but that one simple confession had solidified everything I’ve carried inside me.
I huff out a laugh as I walk along, my hands full with a cardboard to-go container of coffees and a bag of breakfast sandwiches. I woke up early to go get us fuel from the Latte Spot. Jaxon and I have a light schedule the rest of the week… classestoday and tomorrow and practice as well. We have a series of home games this weekend, which allows us to attend Rya’s ballet performance on Saturday.
