Page 28 of This Is Love
When I continue my stare down, he shrugs and grumbles, “Whatever. Do what you want. You always do, anyway. Just know I won’t let you hurt her. You don’t want to, wouldn’t even mean to, but you might. As far as the two of us go, keep right on lying to yourself. Go ahead and hate me for everything, Jax. It’s fine. I’m used to your shit. But she’s not, and you’re going to lose her if you keep acting like this.” With that, he pivots on his heel and a moment later disappears around the corner.
Fuck. As much as I hate to admit it, he’s right. I yank the towel from the hook outside my stall and hurriedly dry off, then tug on my joggers. There’s a second where I consider going back to my room and shutting out the world, but apparently my body has a different path in mind because I end up outside Rya’s door, still half-damp from the shower with the towel draped over my shoulder. I knock and a moment later, the door swings open. Hazel’s lips quirk into a smile before she loudly proclaims, “Rya, another one of your boyfriends is here.”
I roll my eyes at her, and she does some little dance step away from me, turns, and climbs onto her bed as Rya comes into view. My heart clenches. She’s so fucking beautiful. For once, her hair is loose, softly cascading around her shoulders. She’s already in a baggy sweatshirt and pajama pants, ready for bed.
“Do you have a few minutes?” The muscle in my jaw twitches, unsure why I’m even listening to Logan and his fucking sage advice, but here I am. Hell, maybe it’s because I have a begrudging respect for his tight bond with Rya. He must be doing something right to have earned her affection and trust.
Rya glances at Hazel, then grabs the lanyard with her keys from her desk. As she exits, she murmurs, “Not here.”
With the door firmly shut behind us, I eye her carefully. “Something wrong?”
“Oh, she’s just— I dunno. I gave her the rundown on everything that’s been going on… and ever since it’s been a little awkward around here.” She frowns, looking me over as we walk. “Did you just come from the shower?”
“Uh.” I scrub my hand through my wet hair. “Yeah.” I jerk my thumb over my shoulder as we pass Logan’s door. “He cornered me while I was in there.”
She frowns, questions clear in her eyes.
I shrug in response, unsure why I feel the need to say anything, but the words tumble out anyway. “I think you’re already aware of this, but he really cares a lot about you.”
She cocks her head to the side, considering my words. “I know he does.” After a careful nod, she raises a brow, as if she’s waiting for me to finish.
My lips quirk up on one side. “Yes, I do, too.”
“So, you do have feelings for me.” The confusion in Rya’s voice only confirms that Logan might be right. I will lose her if I can’t pull myself free of the anger I have toward him.
I hook an arm around her shoulders, drawing her against my side. “Don’t sound so surprised, pretty girl.”
Her shoulders roll inward, and she chews on her lip as she studies me. “I guess I’m a little lost. I don’t always understand your actions.”
Shit. In my head, I turn over her words. I’m going to have to talk to her, and soon. Cupping her head between my hands, I bring her within inches of my face and stare into her luminous eyes for several long seconds as we breathe together. “If you’re lost … let me show you the way home.” I press a kiss to her lips, then gesture toward my door.
She nods as I let us into my room, shutting the door firmly behind us, then sling my towel toward the laundry basket andflip the light on in the bathroom. I haven’t decided how much to say yet, but some of what I could potentially admit to her, shouldn’t be done under the harsh glow of overhead fluorescent lighting.
I stop at the side of my bed, sitting on the edge, and hold out a hand to her. She closes the distance immediately, and I draw her over to stand between my legs. I feel something stir deep within me as she clamps her teeth down on her plump lower lip. My whole truth—that’s what I want to tell her. All the humiliating, awful, gut-wrenching details. But I can’t. I’m not ready.
When she lets a soft moan escape, I can no longer stop myself from taking what I want. I tug her body closer, tilting my head up to seek solace in the softness of her lips. With every beat of my heart thumping against my rib cage, my tongue plunges and plunders, disturbing the dark quiet of this moment between us.
Rya leans into me, her fingers digging into my skin. Teasing at the back of my mind is the fact that she’s already been with Logan. That he was her first. And that has me riled up and needing to put my brand on her, too. It’s intense, the way the idea of it has lightning racing through my body, jolting through my blood in unsteady pumps. There’s an excited flutter in her breath that makes me want to fucking devour the innocence left in her.
We tumble onto the mattress, our bodies tangled together. Her legs part as she straddles my hips, bringing the heat between her legs into direct contact with my dick. Groaning, I grasp her ass, pulling her tightly to me as I grind against her from below. My cock is mostly unrestrained, the joggers I’d thrown on after my shower the only thing I’m wearing. I know she feels it, and even better, she likes it, if the gasps and panted breath between kisses means anything. We’ve fooled around plenty, but mostly over-the-clothes stuff. And maybe that’sbecause I was getting my dick hard on the side for Logan. I don’t fucking know. Thinking about it only makes me hot all the fuck over.
I slip my hand under the waistband of her loose pajama pants, delving inside them. I explore the toned muscle of her ass cheek. Her skin is bare until I slip my fingers closer to center, where I encounter the lacy strip of material that runs between her legs. “Fuck, pretty girl. You’re killing me.”
Her breath hitches, chest jerking when my fingertips follow the path of the delicate fabric. “Jaxon,” she says on a sigh before subtly rocking her hips over my erection.
“Do you want me to keep touching you?” I lightly drag my fingers over her center. The dampness I discover has my jaw tightening as I drink in her moan.
“Y-yes.”
I don’t wait for more assurance than that, quickly tugging the barrier of her thong out of the way. Lusty thoughts spin through my head on overdrive as her slick heat calls out to me, urging me on. On a strangled groan, I push a digit inside her trembling body, and she cries out. The sound of it feeds my soul. And the feel of her? It’s got my brain on fucking fire. My dick rock hard from wanting more of her.
In need of a way to quench my thirst, I roll her to her back and quickly tug her pajama bottoms down her slim legs, taking the underwear with them. Bare from the waist down, she burrows her face into my neck as I slide my hand over her abdomen, returning to her pussy. I stroke her, dipping a deft finger inside, then out to circle her clit until she’s a whimpering, shuddering mess.
“Jaxon,” she gasps, clutching at me, her back bowing off the bed. “Wait. I?—”
It’s like a cold bucket of sober dumping over me. And considering how drunk I was getting on her, I feel like that’s anapt comparison. I inhale through clenched teeth as we both sit up. Tipping my head to the side, I try to focus on her face and the sudden worry that has appeared there instead of the fact that she’s naked from the waist down.
“Um. I’m sorry—” Her eyes crash shut, and she covers her face with both hands. From behind them, she mumbles, “I know this is the last thing you were thinking was about to happen, but… I think we should talk. Get some things out in the open.”
