Page 19 of This Is War: All's Fair Duet
As I exit the building, I draw the chilled night air into my lungs and scan the area. Dark is falling, and so are my hopes that Logan’s going to show up. I squint toward the tree line, a shiver running down my spine as I imagine someone standing there in the shadows, creeping on me. All the horror flicks I’ve been watching lately are not helping my state of mind. I have a runaway imagination and am prone to scaring the shit out of myself for no good reason.
So, now not only am I worried about where Logan is, but I’m going to have to walk all the way across campus alone. Normally, Hazel and I are attached at the hip, but she made other plans when I told her I was meeting Logan. Beginning to worry, I take a moment to shoot off a couple more messages to him.
A subtle intake of breath from somewhere to my right side has my head whipping toward it, and my stomach does an ugly twist while my heart thunders against my rib cage.Shit. Fuck. Dammit.My palms grow sweaty, and my eyes widen as a dark figure pushes off the gray stone wall that runs along the side of the building. My fight or flight response is definitely screaming at me to run. I take ahuge gulp of air, giving whoever the asshole stalker is one last look.
Wait. Is that—?Holy shit, what’s Jaxon doing here?
He shoots me a disarming smile—a panty-melter of a grin—and relief surges through me. Is this a coincidence, or was he waiting for me? Has he been watching me this whole time while I fought off a miniature panic attack?
Hesitantly, I hold up a hand. “Hi?” The single word comes out more like a question than a greeting as my head tilts and my brows furrow.
“Hi yourself, beautiful.” He strides toward me, each step measured and cautious, almost as if he’s afraid he’ll scare me away.
Drinking him in from head to toe, my throat goes dry. He’s casually calm, but his entire persona screamsbad boy. A jolt of excitement streaks through me. Dark hair and eyes, a devious twitch to his lips. His sight is hot on me, lingering in places that have my heart racing. My gaze pings over him, and it registers that his hair is wet, as if he may have just come from practice himself.
For a few seconds, I can’t help but wonder again where Logan is and where he’s disappeared to. But the reality is that Jaxonishere, so I make a valiant attempt to clear my head, giving him my full attention. “Um”—I hesitate as my feet carry me over to him—“I feel dumb for asking, but what are you doing here?” My gaze flicks around a finaltime, expecting Logan to push through the doors of the gym at any moment, like he has so many other times in recent memory—like we’d specifically planned when we spoke this morning.
“Waiting for you.” Jaxon’s voice is silky. Seductive. And as he closes the distance between us, I smile up at him, not quite understanding what’s happening, but willing to let him continue for the sake of curiosity. I’d love to know why exactly he and Logan don’t see eye to eye.
There has to be more to it than Logan and him “getting into it” like Jaxon claimed. And what was it Logan had said?It’s stepbrother stuff.Funny, but both of them told me not to worry about it, yet neither seems to want to expand on what their issues are… and that just piques my interest even further.
I arch a brow, playing along with him. “Oh, really? You weren’t just waiting on the first random girl who exited the building?”
He slaps a hand to his heart. “You wound me, Rya.”
I wrinkle my nose, huffing out a laugh. “Oh, whatever. You’re charming, I’ll give you that.” I wet my lips, contemplating how much flirting can be done before I find myself in over my head.
His lips quirk up on one side, and I immediately have my answer.Not much at all. Shit.This guy knows how to make me into a puddle of want.
But the problem I keep coming back to that is twisting me up and making me so fucking confused I don’t know what to do is this: this guy put those bruises on Logan. He hurt my best friend. I saw it with my own two eyes. But Jaxon didn’t walk away unscathed either. So, what do I do with that?
I look away, tucking my lower lip between my teeth. My chest feels tight. I shouldn’t be here; shouldn’t be looking at Jaxon like I have been; shouldn’t be thinking about him at all. Yet, I find myself fantasizing about what might have happened if I hadn’t been so drunk Saturday night. I bite my lip as the crushing weight of my thoughts settles on my shoulders. Being anywhere near Jaxon is a disaster waiting to happen, but I’m like one of those stupid moths to a fucking flame. I can’t resist.
Ugh!WhyshouldI resist, though? I’ve wasted so much time pining for Logan, waiting around for him when he’s never going to want me. It’s stupid. But why does it have to be Logan’s stepbrother making me feel like this? I squeeze my eyes shut as I concentrate with everything in me just to draw a damn breath.
“Hey.” Jaxon’s voice comes out raspy and completely impossible to ignore. Before I know what he’s doing, he’s drawing my face back to his with a few fingers under my chin. He doesn’t remove them, simply stares into my eyes. Something flickers in his, but I’m unsure what it is.Confusion? Regret? But then, like a heat-seeking missile, he bends until his face is level with mine. “What’s wrong?” he breathes out as he finally drops his hand.
My eyes flick between his steady gaze and those decadent, full lips of his. A wave of heat washes over me at the same time the errant thought flits through my mind that men shouldn’t be made to be so sinfully irresistible. And this one in particular is completely drool-worthy. Damn his high cheekbones and piercing gaze.Whatever you do, don’t look down, Rya, because you know the body is just as good.I remember this much from the party the other night, even if I didn’t see everything—that I remember—but I definitely felt the well-hewn muscle under his clothing, and… other things. One breath after another stutters from my lungs.
Just when I finally feel capable of answering, I stare into his eyes and find myself struggling not to get too lost in them. Logan and I are close, but I wish this animosity between him and Jaxon didn’t exist. I’m in the dark as to the root of their conflict, which makes it even more difficult to sort out what I’m feeling.
I would never want to hurt Logan… but Jaxon intrigues me. I close my eyes, trying to gather my thoughts. I don’t know what to do. The safer path is to put a halt to whatever this is with Jaxon, to go on as I have with the most amazing best friend. In my mind’s eye, a reel of good times with Logan spins at lightning speed. He’d been the first person I met when my family moved to the area, and he’s beenmy personever since. We’ve seen each other through too many ups and downs to count.
So, for what feels like the thousandth time, I ask myself the same question that’s been running through my mind since the party gone wrong… how did I not know Logan had a stepbrother? And why does it have to be Jaxon? My head is ready to explode the more I think about it. Logan is open about most things, so I’m confused why this would be something he’s been completely silent about. Logan kept Jaxon’s existence from me on purpose, and it hurts in a way I wasn’t prepared for.
Swallowing hard, I open my eyes to find Jaxon’s curious gaze on me. I lift a hand, gently running my fingertips over the bruise on his face as I murmur, “I saw Logan’s rib cage. And I don’t know you well enough to understand why the two of you are at odds with each other. I didn’t even know you existed, Jaxon. Explain that for me.”
Jaxon pauses, wincing, but whether I’m causing him pain by touching his cheekbone or because he doesn’t want to answer is anyone’s guess. He draws in a breath. “We’ve been making each other miserable since the moment we met. We don’t get along. Maybe it was the circumstances surrounding that. Maybe we were nevermeant to be brothers.” A muscle at the back of his jaw twitches, and he shakes his head. “I don’t know. I’d hoped with him coming to Evermore this year, maybe we’d be able to sort through things. Especially since we’ll be forced to work together on a team again. But maybe that’s asking too much.” The hurt in his eyes is on full display for only an instant before he tucks it aside. From the following grimace, I’m fairly certain he never meant for me to see it.
Shaking his head, he lets out a hard breath. “Can we set that aside for a while?” He glances at me as we begin to walk in the general direction of the dorm. My brow furrows, thoughts centered on the seemingly torment-filled relationship between him and my best friend. Out of nowhere, he pauses again, and I stop along with him. His stomach growls loudly, and he smirks. “I’m starving. You wanna grab dinner from the dining hall?”
I shrug, unsure whether I’m in the mood to eat or not, but there’s something about Jaxon that makes him hard to resist. My heart does a little flip in my chest as our gazes connect.
He grins big, giving me these dark puppy dog eyes that make me melt. “We should get something to eat. I’m always famished after practice. You’ve gotta be hungry. At least for a little something.”
Shoving my sweaty palms into the pockets of myhoodie, I weigh my options but can’t come up with any reason to say no other than Logan might be pissed I haven’t automatically written Jaxon off. But Logan’s also not here to meet me like he said he would be. I give one last glance around to be sure. He’s nowhere to be seen.
Jaxon shoots me a coaxing smirk. “Come on. Am I so bad?”
