Page 14 of This Is War: All's Fair Duet
Internally, I cringe as I study this guy who has stormed into my life, taking hold of something inside me with very little effort. Oh my god, what is it about Jaxon that I like so much? A million thoughts bounce through my head, but the one at the forefront is the guilt springing to life inside me. I don’t even know him that well, but I feel an invisible tether to him—a pull that will most definitely upset Logan a whole lot. It’s impossible for me to sortthrough these feelings with Jaxon standing so close, those dark eyes of his piercing mine.
He remains still, not a single sound leaving his lips. When I touch his cheekbone, though, his chest jerks.
“Does it hurt?” I whisper.Did Logan do this?That’s what I really want to ask, but I keep the question clammed up inside me, worried that it’ll cause a problem. I’m beginning to see that when it comes to Logan and Jaxon, there’s a lot to be uncovered. I’m in the dark, and I don’t like it here, but I’m not ready for an attempt at prying the info out of either of them.
His jaw twitches in answer, then, as if he’s afraid he’s going to scare me off, he slowly brings his hand up to grasp mine and pulls it away. He doesn’t let go, simply holds it in his much bigger one and tugs me along with him as he continues to our final destination.
My eyes track around the darkened room, waiting silently for Jaxon to flick on the light. I blink as the spacious area is illuminated by a soft glow. The door snaps shut, and I spin around. Jaxon leans against the door, his arms crossed over his chest, his head slightly bowed so his hair hangs somewhat in his eyes. When he finally speaks, his words come out as a throaty rasp. “To answer your question, Logan and I got into it in the locker room earlier. Nothing that hasn’t happened before. Don’t worryabout it.” He looks me up and down, from my crazy hair to the socks on my feet.
Realizing my shoulder is bare, I shrug, trying to get the neckline of my top back into place. But it’s no good, it just slips right down my arm again, and when I hazard a look at Jaxon, he’s watching every move I make from under hooded eyes. My entire body shudders involuntarily. “A-are you gonna tell me more”—I expel a hard breath—“or just listen to me stumble over my words? Because I can totally do that.”
A smirk teases at his full lips. “Yeah, I’ve noticed you’re good at that sort of thing. I like the way you dress. You know, when you’re not looking to impress anyone.”
I cover my face with my hands. A rush of embarrassment flows through me, even though I don’t think he’s necessarily picking on me. “Is it that bad?” I mumble, peeking from between my fingers. He makes no move to step any farther into the room and has blocked the only exit… but strangely, I’m not afraid.
“No.” He winks. “We had a lot of fun last night, didn’t we?” At my nod, he continues, “Now, what did you want to talk to me about?”
Unable to stop my eyes from roaming over the bruising on his face, for a moment my mind has trouble landing on exactly how I want to approach this. Finally, Isuck in a breath before I blurt, “Well. For one, I’m a little nervous about whatever Idon’tremember from last night.” Clasping my hands in front of me, I tuck them under my chin and shoot him a pained smile. “I, um… I remember the bathroom debacle.”
A slow smile works its way to his lips. “Do you remember kissing me before that?”
Do I allow this conversation to go where I think it’s heading? I bite my lip, and my cheeks burn. All I can do is nod. Oh god, is Logan going to hate me? He’s never cared who I was interested in before. But this feels different. There’s a locomotive with Jaxon’s name on it barreling toward me. And I don’t know if I can stop the collision course we’re on. I swallow, my eyes flicking to his, uncertain. Would Logan pull me free from the wreckage?
“And how about when I boosted you onto the bathroom counter?” Jaxon’s brows rise, waiting. From the look of hunger in his eyes, he’s remembering every minute of an encounter I hardly recall no matter how badly I want to.
I desperately attempt to wet the inside of my mouth, watching the comfortable way he lounges against the door, his gaze sliding lazily over me in a way that makes my insides feel like warm honey. My chest catches before a breath filters unevenly from my lungs. “Yes.” I stare athim, willing my lips to move. “Maybe you could just… I dunno, forget everything that happened after that?”
My eyes zero in on his teeth as they scrape over his lip. “You were really feeling it, I can tell you that much.” He chuckles, and his eyes pin on me. “If the noises you were making were any indication, you enjoyed what we were doing a whole helluva lot.”
The insinuation that we did things I can’t remember is too much. My face flushes with heat, and somewhere behind my rib cage, my heart staggers around and plummets. I blink, swallowing hard. “Did I?” But what were wedoing? And the only thought screaming in my head is that I need to run, to not face what I may or may not have done while under the influence. A muffled cry burbles up from my throat, and I slap my hands over my mouth, horrified. “I need to go.” Taking two quick steps toward the door, I reach for the handle, even though Jaxon seems unfazed and is blocking my exit.
He holds his hands up, a soft laugh falling from his lips. “Hold on. I was joking. I promise.”
“About what, exactly?”
His mouth hikes up on one side. “I mean, you did enjoy it, but you passed out before we did more than exchange a few kisses. Nothing more than what we were already doing while we were drinking.”
My tongue peeks out to wet my lips as I study him. “You’re sure?” I make every attempt to slow my breathing while I wait for him to answer, but it’s really fucking hard with him staring at me so boldly. He’s kinda beautiful, if you can call a man that. Plush lips, a jaw that could cut glass, high cheekbones, and dark lashes that frame impossibly rich-hued eyes of a chocolate brown color. I’d like to dive into them and stay there forever. My breathing stutters as I gasp. The longer portion of his hair on top of his head sweeps over his forehead, partially obscuring his gaze.
Shit.Should I be thinking about Logan’s stepbrother like this? My head is foggy with confusion, my palms sweaty with nerves. I blink up at Jaxon. If he were anyone else, this would be so easy. Logan doesn’t feel about me the way I do about him. He couldn’t possibly. And I can never tell him what I feel for him because his rejection would crush me. So…
“Do you want me to tell you what happened after you passed out?” He pushes away from the door, edging closer.
A jolt of awareness slams through me. One thing’s for sure, no matter what Logan might think, my body definitely recognizes my interest in Jaxon.Please, someone help me.I wish Hazel were here so I could ask for her honest opinion, because she’d give it to me straight. I clench myteeth and shoot him a tight smile. “That might alleviate some of the worries swirling around in my mind.”
Tilting his head to the side, his gaze shifts from my eyes to the left. I’m confused for a moment, but then he reaches out, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. From there, his fingertips trail from the back of my jaw to my chin before dropping his hand. “I realized too late that your tolerance was way lower than I thought, and the rum hit you hard. When you passed out, I carried you up the stairs and made them let me take you outta there.”
Oh god.“You carried me all the way back to the dorm?”
He inclines his head, locking eyes with me. “Sure did. I knew you had to live in Deveney Hall, being a dancer and all.” His brow furrows. “But you were so out of it, there was no way you were telling me where your room was. And I was nervous because I thought you might get sick.”
My mouth drops open, eyes crashing shut. “Shit. I-I’m so sorry.” Drawing in a breath, I decide I’d better own my shit and force myself to look at him.
A soft smile teases at his lips, and he shakes his head. “Don’t be. I didn’t want you to be alone. Just in case. Then, well…” He clenches his teeth, a look of consternation washes over his face.
“Then what?” I croak, terrified of what he’s about to tell me.
“You threw up in the hallway. Most of it just hit the floor, but it kinda splattered.”
