Page 158 of Misery
"Yesterday. He wasn't sure. Just suspicions. Patterns that didn't make sense until they did."
"So, you just let her show up and destroy herself with guilt?"
"Would it have been better coming from me? The man who stalked you, telling you that your sister was manipulated into giving information?"
Maybe. No. I don't know.
Everything feels wrong now.
My sister is the leak.
The reason I was targeted.
But she's also a victim, manipulated by someone trained to manipulate.
A lonely woman, and someone paid attention to her, made her feel special.
How is that her fault?
"Ivar's wrong," I say. "To blame her."
"He's angry. Looking for someone to punish. Thiago's dead, so Helle gets the anger."
"That's not fair."
"Nothing about this life is fair. You know that."
I think about the last three months. The slow rebuilding of trust with Oskar. Learning to sleep without nightmares.
The careful reconstruction of my relationship with my parents.
The new normal we've all been building, brick by careful brick.
And now Helle's exile cracks through all of it like an earthquake.
"She didn't even say goodbye properly."
"She couldn't. Goodbye makes it real."
"It is real. She's gone." I start crying then.
For my sister, carrying guilt that isn't fully hers.
For my family, broken in new ways.
For the life that keeps taking from us, even when we think we're safe.
Oskar holds me while I cry.
He doesn't try to fix it, doesn't offer empty platitudes.
Just holds me while I break.
He's learned that sometimes the only thing to do with grief is let it happen.
Later, after the tears stop, I text Helle:
Drive safe. Text when you get there. I love you always.
