Page 2 of For the First Time
The front door opened into a small hallway for coats and shoes that branched off into three directions.If you went straight, you’d go to the living room but halfway down the short hall and a sharp turn to the right showed the kitchen.It was closed in, almost like it was designed for a beta to be in here and cooking privately while the pack sat in the living space.A sharp turn to the left was the bathroom, complete with a shower-and-tub combo, the latter of which I’d never used.
Further down the hall, where the apartment officially opened, was the living room.After years of being here, it was finally completely furnished with a couch, coffee table, and a high-quality projector with a pull-down screen.If you went through the living room, you’d come to the laundry and utility rooms, which were separated.On the opposite side of the apartment was the single bedroom with a full closet and a little desk for an at-home office.
I kept my apartment clean and clear of any scents.I didn’t want anything to linger on my clothes or skin that could upset an omega.Since I wasn’t working at the OC anymore, maybe I could start to invest in cleaning supplies with scents.
Maybe that was what I’d do after my haircut.Stop by the store and get scented cleaning supplies.Although it would be a waste of money considering I already had cleaning supplies.So better to just wait until I was actually in need of them.Or until I finally got a job.
That’s what I’ll spend my first paycheck on.Scented cleaning supplies.Unless, of course, I get the job down at the nesting supply store for omegas.Or the job in the home with the pack.But the other jobs—then I’d definitely consider getting scented supplies.
It took me awhile to get ready for bed, mostly because I stalled, deciding I should do the hair mask in the shower, and then shaving my legs for good luck, and then I figured I should pluck my eyebrows while my hair dried and of course if I was going to pluck and shave, it made sense to do the light treatment to stop the hair from coming back as fast.Then I repainted my nails and picked out my outfit for tomorrow while also picking out an outfit for any future interview, just so I knew my choice was made when I was clear-headed and not in a panic of anxiety about what to wear.
Being a beta meant dealing with the stress of life by yourself.Plenty of betas settled down with each other, content with the intimacy and privacy of a single partner.Most of those betas moved out of the city, choosing neighborhoods and counties that were predominantly beta to surround themselves in community.
It was one of the lucky ones that found a place in a pack, a feat slightly more common in the city.Betas could be bonded to alphas and omegas, although it was rare.We didn’t have quite the primal drive that the other designations had.I’d read a lot of studies on both alphas and omegas to help better my assistance to them, so I considered myself a mild expert.
Alphas were territorial.They were also protective of those in their pack to a possibly dangerous level.Socially, they were also the providers, tending to work outside the home.Each alpha was different, with varying levels of dominance, not only in society, but in their own pack hierarchy.More than anything, they loved their omega, the center of their pack.
Omegas were just as territorial as alphas—actually, they were more so.They didn’t like others near their alphas, and they didn’t like others in their space, especially not their nest.Lots of people saw omegas as the weakest designation.They were wrong.Sure, they might not be tall or lithe or built with muscles on muscles on muscles, but they told the alphas where to go, what to do.What they wanted, they got.To me, that was power.
Of course, it was more than just their sparkling personality traits that made up their designations.It was the physical.Beyond big or small.Weak or strong.It was knots and slick.Or in the rarest cases of female alphas and male omegas, locks and slick.
Omegas and alphas simply went together.They reproduced at high rates with high levels of success.That was probably because they had to try every few months for an omega’s heat.
By the time I ran out of ways to stall, I was yawning, and actually ready for bed.
I tossed onto my side, trying to fall asleep.Of course, it would’ve helped if I’d closed my eyes, especially since the moon seemed to be shining extra bright, the fullness almost as brilliant as the sun.I hated it.No, that was mean.I didn’t hate the moon.I didn’t hate being alone at night.I didn’t hate the quiet of my apartment or the largeness of this bed.
I rolled over onto my other side.
I was just a morning person.I was meant to interact with people, to help them.To better their days.What was my purpose if I didn’t protect omegas?
Closing my eyes did nothing to help me sleep.My body might’ve been exhausted—my mind wasn’t.
I could picture the day I was let go.Kept remembering the way I cried when I’d packed up my desk.I had to take down all the sticky notes of motivation, the list of names of omegas I no longer had to check up on and the list of ones I’d wanted to see again.I’d kept emergency sweets in my drawer and a few personal cards from packs that sent out notifications of their bondings.All the connections I’d made were in a binder that I brought home with me, full of people who would work with me to help an omega or pack, just not hire me, a beta.
I wasn’t an omega, so that wasn’t my safe space.But I missed it.Missed the chair that would lean back too far for comfort so I was always perching on the edge.Missed the mat underneath that was supposed to make the rolling chair smoother yet set my teeth on edge every time one wheel would fall off the mat and make the chair a few millimeters crooked.I missed the noise of phones ringing and the smell of descenter being pushed through the air.
I rolled onto my stomach.Why couldn’t I sleep?Was this going to be my life now?Sad and lonely?
No.I refused to be this beta.I was going to get another job.I was going to be happy again.
It wasn’t like I was completely alone.I might have lost my job, but I’d made a friend.A true friend.Hannah and her pack were nice to me.They invited me over at least once a month for whatever small gathering they were having, sometimes with Koda and her alphas as well.
No matter how upset I was that I lost my job, I was even more upset with the OC.I knew it wasn’t everyone, but someone there was doing wrong.Investigating omegas who protested against oppressive laws wasn’t what they should’ve been doing.Hannah had told me all about how she hated being picked up at thirteen.How scared and terrified she was.She never even allowed her family visitation after that, and I wasn’t sure she’d seen them since.
That was the kind of thing I wanted to help.How to make it safer, less scary for younger omegas coming to the compound.She should have been a tool, in the best way, to better the OC.Instead, she was targeted.Not just once.Or twice.
I guess on some level, I was glad I wasn’t part of a system that had hurt my friend.That also meant that there was one less person working there that wanted to make changes for the better.Knowing what I did, about Hannah and her experiences, I would have done something to try and create change.Talked to someone about the studies that showed the safest way to keep a blooming omega safe was to ensure their pickup at thirteen was less than thirty minutes long.
It was a timer that was set.Once they were picked up, they needed to be in their new nest, at the compound, within a half an hour.Then they could reregulate their emotions in a safe, private space.
Obviously, the quick timeframe didn’t help Hannah—it scared her more.Rather than feeling secure in her new space, she resented leaving her old one.
Was she the only one?It might be rare, but the OC was mandated to accommodate and protect omegas.If they knew some omegas would react poorly, they’d better their standards.After all, they were dealing with people.With children.
Okay, I wasn’t going to be able to sleep if I kept internally ranting.I knew it.It wasn’t like I could change anything.I couldn’t magically wake up employed.Couldn’t even make changes in the OC if I wanted.
Although...
