Page 29 of Touch of Innocence
“Thanks. I’m gonna go get some coffee and half a bottle of Advil,” Sam said, pleased when he saw that he’d teased a little bit of a grin out of Gunner. Gently, Sam leaned in and kissed the other man, then pulled away, found his clothes, which were moderately neatly draped over the back of a nearby chair.
Dressed, he went to the door, but he couldn’t help but look back. And when he did look, he saw that Gunner was staring right back at him.
* * *
Sam had tried to brace himself, because in a house as full as this one was, there was usually someone around. It was not quite nine yet, so chances were good that someone would be in the kitchen.
Probably the worst possible person would be Ben, of course. Ben, who had seen Sam acting like an idiot the night before, and who was probably going to want to talk to him about the fact that Sam was apparently dating Gunner.
So, of course, the first person that Sam laid eyes on was Ben, who was bustling around the kitchen, preparing breakfast. The only good thing about that was that Ruby was also there, kicking her feet idly as she stuffed what seemed to be her entire body weight of pancakes and bacon into her mouth.
Ben wouldn’t say anything around Ruby, he knew. So Sam relaxed, nodding cautiously to his brother as he went to the coffee maker, ruffling up Ruby’s hair as he passed her. She stuck out her tongue at him, looking years younger than her age, and Sam grinned and poked his own out in return as he poured coffee into a mug. A lot of coffee.
“You hungry, Sammy?” Ben asked, and Sam noted that he didn’t feel the same annoyance when he heard his nickname. He had gone on a campaign to get people to stop calling him that once he was a teenager, but then Gunner came along and suddenly, Sam didn’t mind so much.
“No,” Sam said honestly. His stomach clenched at the very thought of food, and Ben smirked briefly at him as their eyes met. His brother knew very well why Sam wouldn’t be interested in food, and he cracked a couple of eggs and added more bacon to the pan.
“Trust me, little brother, you’re going to want to eat,” Ben told him. “Sit. The grease will help.”
“Help with what?” Ruby asked curiously, and Sam made a face at her. Nosy little brat. A sweet kid, but always asking questions.
“Sammy just woke up on the wrong side of the bed,” Ben commented diplomatically. “He’ll be fine. Eat your pancakes.”
Ruby stood up, grabbing her sticky, mostly empty plate and wandering over to put it in the sink.
“I’m full. Can I go play with Marcy?” Her current best friend, Sam knew. Ruby was pretty much obsessed with her and had been spending more time with her than she had been at her own home.
A hot, crawly sensation rose in Sam, something he recognized dimly as close to panic. If Ruby left, he would be alone with Ben, and without her calming influence, Sam was pretty sure there was going to be an uncomfortable conversation between them.
“Sure,” Ben allowed, and Sam looked down at the plate which Ben set down in front of him. It was a bit of a shock to him, but the eggs and bacon actually didn’t smell completely repulsive. He usually ate a lot healthier than this, and his breakfast was more likely to be a green smoothie than a big plate of eggs and bacon, but at the moment, this seemed to be just what the doctor ordered.
“Thanks! I’ll ride my bike over,” Ruby ran over to hug Ben, then nudged Sam affectionately on her way past, which only made him feel moderately nauseated even as his stomach was jostled. It was an improvement.
Then she was gone, all of her preteen energy leaving with her, and it was just Sam and Ben. Sam focused on his eggs like he might actually keel over dead if he looked up, but he heard the faint rustling of Ben settling down at the table with him.
“So,” Ben commented, and his tone was so deliberately offhand that Sam knew he was just as in for it as he had thought he would be. “Where should we start?”
“Nowhere,” Sam suggested. Not that he had a lot of hope for that, but he figured he should give it a shot, anyway. “There’s nothing to start about.”
“Uh huh.” Ben snorted, a soft sound of derision, and Sam knew that he didn’t want to look up right then. He knew what he would see. He knew his brother’s face, the man who had, let’s face it, saved him, maybe better than he knew his own.
“Look, if this is about Gunner,” Sam suddenly spoke, and he let his eyes rise, only to see exactly what he had known that he would. Ben was looking right at him, his hands cupping a mug of coffee, and there was amusement on his face.
Not just amusement, though. Concern, too. Sam sighed, then let his gaze drift to the big window. He heard a dog’s bark and saw Shadow’s huge black form almost fly past. Sam knew his dog, though, and he knew that Shadow was happy, excited, not barking at an intruder but at a friend.
It was Gunner. He came into sight a few moments later, dropping down to his knees and scratching enthusiastically behind the dog’s ears. Adorably disheveled, the handsome man played with the big black lab, chasing him around the yard, giving Shadow the workout and getting some of that puppy energy level out.
“It’s about Gunner. What’s going on? Are you dating him?” Ben called Sam’s attention back, and there was a knowing look in his eyes that Sam was sure that he didn’t particularly care for. It was a question, but at the same time, it wasn’t one.
How much did Ben know already? Some, obviously, from the bar, but Ben had a bad habit of being annoyingly observant. He had probably already suspected even before he had confirmation.
“I don’t know,” Sam sighed, finally giving in. This talk was going to happen, and once he let himself see that, he was also able to see that part of him wanted it to. He did need someone to talk to, to help sort through all of this, and if Ben knew already, he was the obvious choice.
Ben looked at him expectantly, and Sam drew in a deep, deep breath, letting it out slowly, letting it settle his mind a little bit.
“I don’t know,” he repeated. “We’re something.” Something more than sex, he meant, but he would be damned if he was going to say that to his brother. “I don’t know if I should let myself go there, though.”
Ben didn’t comment, just sitting there and sipping his coffee and waiting for Sam to speak, to release the words from his mouth. And once he’d started, it was so easy just to continue.
