Page 30 of The Secret Life of a Lady
‘Millie! Honestly. You are too bold.’ Ivy put a delicate hand on Hannah’s shoulder and patted her. ‘Please don’t take offense, Hannah.’
‘Pardon me for being honest. I saw Lord Killian watching you from across the ballroom when you were battling your skirts. I thought the curtains might catch on fire from all the smoulder in his gaze.’ She waggled her eyebrows and shimmied her shoulders, her breasts jiggling with the motion. Millie laughed. ‘I’d better be careful, or these girls will cause a scandal. Almost as big a scandal as you and Lord Killian.’
Hannah felt queasy. This kind of speculation was exactly what she hoped to avoid. ‘I don’t think he’s smitten. I suspect he is doing this as a favour to Lady Philippa.’
‘Just ignore Millie. She loves to stir the pot.’ Ivy arched pale brows at Millie who stuck her tongue out in reply.
Hannah surprised herself with a giggle at Millie’s silly expression, then slapped her hand over her mouth. She hadn’t giggled since she was a young girl. The bubbling mirth in her belly was most alarming.
Ivy returned her attention back to Hannah. ‘Lieutenant General Killian would never toy with your reputation by courtingyou without intentions of marriage. And if you must have a husband, you could do far worse than him.’
You shouldn’t waste yourself on someone like me. His words haunted her.
Could a man whose blood runs black with sin understand the monster living in my dark centre?
She had neither time nor interest in answering such a question. He might be compelling in a contradictory kind of way. And he might do wicked things to her against a balustrade. He might dance like a dream and kiss like a devil, but that meant nothing. She was not interested in Lord Killian. Not for marriage or anything else.
Although, if she wanted a dalliance with the duke, Philippa had made it clear Hannah could pursue an affair. She would never bring disgrace on Philippa, but with the duchess’s assurance of continued support regardless of Hannah’s behaviour, her virtue only held what value she placed upon it. And there was no guarantee she would get another chance to answer lingering questions she had about desire.
In this instance, engaging in a physical liaison with her enemy might actually hold merit. She wouldn’t have to worry about her heart becoming involved, and the duke was certainly not at risk of emotional entanglement. Their kiss on the balcony proved they shared attraction, even if they lacked trust. But that was also beneficial. She wouldn’t have to pretend affection to satisfy her curiosity.
‘Hannah, you look positively flushed. Shall I get you a cup of water? Perhaps some lemonade?’ Ivy fluttered around her like a mother hen.
‘No, I’m fine.’ Hannah wisely kept her thoughts to herself. It wouldn’t do to scare her new friends off with her illicit wonderings.
The maids had mended her petticoats without discovering her weaponry, thank heavens. Hannah resettled her overskirt in place. ‘Thank you so much.’ She smiled at them.
The two girls curtsied and bustled off to wait for the next dishevelled lady.
Hannah turned to Millie and Ivy. ‘You are both imagining things between the duke and me. We barely know each other.’
‘Men don’t have to know a woman to want her. In fact, knowing a woman generally puts a damper on wanting them.’ Millie tugged on the front of her dress, adjusting the fabric to cover as much of her ample décolletage as the silk could manage without splitting at the seams.
‘Don’t listen to her. Millie’s had a rough go, but that doesn’t mean all men are heartless, cold blackguards like Lord Franklin St George. It’s such rotten luck he’s best friends with my brother. Alfred’s always been the victim of poor friendships.’
‘Lord Franklin St George is a blackguard, your brother is far too trusting, and I have no wish to speak further on the subject.’ Millie pinched her cheeks a final time, but Hannah didn’t miss the quiver in Millie’s chin. There was a story there Hannah wanted to discover. But she couldn’t lose focus on finding Sarah Bright’s killer.
‘I shall send an invitation to the duchess for our house party. Please do come, Hannah.’ Ivy looked at Hannah with the same wide-eyed expression a puppy employed to get its way. It was a devastatingly successful trick.
Hannah forced her lips to tip up in a smile. Would Ivy be so welcoming if she knew Hannah’s sole purpose in joining the party was to potentially expose Ivy’s father as a sadistic murderer? Doubtful.
‘I would love to join, but I shall defer to Lady Winterbourne. My activities are limited to her interests.’
‘Well, I’m sure you can exert some influence over her, Hannah.’ Millie squeezed Hannah’s hand. ‘Now, mind your skirts, ladies. We’re on the move.’
Hannah fell in step behind them. Philippa would most definitely accept the invitation to Ivy’s house party. After hearing Millie and Ivy discussing Sarah Bright’s possible position in the Cavendale household, turning down an opportunity to have such unfettered access to investigate their home was unthinkable.
A house party would give Hannah limitless opportunities to slip away and poke her nose into countless nooks and crannies where one might hide evidence of a murder. Her traitorous thoughts slipped to other things that might happen in the dark and empty rooms of the Cavendale’s country estate. If Lord Killian attended, which he doubtlessly would, she might bump into him on a daily basis. Hannah’s stomach fluttered.
An unexpected longing to be a normal woman with normal goals of love and marriage washed through Hannah like a rogue tide. But she pushed those thoughts back into the depths. To allow herself to get caught in a fantasy she neither wanted nor deserved was dangerous to her mission.
Her attendance at the house party was for a singular purpose. She would need to fade back into the shadows where she belonged. It was there the demons hid, and there, she would hunt a killer.
Killian looked for an opportunity to get Miss Simmons alone all evening with damnable success. She was avoiding him. But she couldn’t avoid him forever. He breathed a grateful sigh when Philippa nodded to him, signalling her desire to leave. One did not argue with the Duchess of Dorset. Of that, he was certain.
As they trundled home in the carriage, Killian plotted his next move.
‘Thank you for a lovely evening, Lord Killian.’ Lady Philippa moved to the carriage door with an agility belying her years. Again, she did not wait for Killian, alighting as soon as the step was set. She swept up the stairs of her stone entrance and into the house before Killian could settle his boots on the pavement. Miss Simmons’s patroness seemed determined to introduce a scandal into her household by leaving them alone. Killian would have to find some way of thanking her.
