Page 52 of Dreams Come True at the Fairytale Museu
‘Staying hydrated. That’s why I’ve always got a bottle of water with me. And the reason those crisps were so bad was because it supposedly helps to avoid salt, but?—’
So many little things. It’s like a crushing realisation and it makes me grab his arm to pull him to a halt, put the boxes down the on the pavement and throw my arms around him again.
This affectseveryaspect of his life and he’s fightingsohard to keep it hidden. There are so many things about him that didn’t make sense, but now do, and I don’t know what to do other than hug him to bits. I knew he was hiding something, and all along I’ve thought it was something underhanded, and I had absolutely no idea it would be something like this.
He laughs at the unexpected hug. His arms slide around my back and he bends until he can lift me off the floor. ‘What’s got into you tonight? It’s just a… thing… I have to deal with. You don’t have to hug me to within an inch of my life.’
I squeeze him tighter and nod hard, knowing he’ll feel it, because if there’s one thing I desperatelydoneed to do tonight, it’s hug him.
I feel his face shift through my giant scarf like his smile is widening, and we cling onto each other for a little while, until something changes and I can sense his body language tightening up.
‘And you certainly don’t have to feel sorry for me.’ He abruptly plonks me down and stalks away, and I have to grab my box and package and catch up to him.
‘I’m not hugging you because I feel sorry for you,’ I explain when I realise why his body language changed so abruptly. ‘I feel bad for all the things I didn’t know. I accused you of being a spoilt only child when you asked me to talktoyou. I’ve said – and thought – so many things about you because I didn’t understand.’
‘I don’t mind that. I’d rather people think things like that about me than know the truth.’
He’s clammed up now we’ve gone back to walking side by side, and I’m making an effort to turn towards him every time I speak, determined to ensure he doesn’t stop opening up yet, even ifheis more than ready to. ‘Do you get the other things as well? The vertigo and tinnitus?’
‘They come and go. Bouts of vertigo usually pass quickly. Tinnitus drives me mad for weeks on end and then stops until the next time.’
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ I ask the question that’s screaming the loudest to be answered, because everything would have been so much easier if he’d told me straight away, but what he said about accommodating his failings is replaying in my head too, and I feel like he’s got a distorted vision of how people might react.
‘Are you kidding? I don’t tell anyone.’ He lets out a scoff and then looks worried. ‘And you can’t either. I don’t wantanyoneto know about this, ever. You have to promise me, Liss. No one can know.’
‘I promise.’ I rush to reassure him because he sounds sourgent, and every doubt he’s ever had about trusting me is flashing across his face all at once.
‘Thank you.’ His sigh of relief is the loudest I’ve ever heard. ‘Apart from my mother, you’re theonlyperson I’ve ever told. I haven’t got my head around talking about it yet.’
I try not to think about how special that makes me feel. I know we’ve worked together for a while now, but he could’ve pushed on with denying it tonight. Hechoseto let me in. ‘How can that be?’
He glances at me with a raised eyebrow, like it’s a question I should already know the answer to. ‘Because I don’t want anyone knowing my weaknesses, obviously.’
‘It’s not a weakness, is it? It’s a… difference.’
‘People take advantage of differences. People use them against you. I was a bullied kid – I refuse to be a bullied adult as well.’
‘But people must know. People you work with. Friends. I figured it out in the few weeks we’ve known each other.’
‘Yeah, butthissituation is unusual. I don’t usually work so closely with someone for so many weeks. I’m usually alone in my office. I can cover it in face-to-face meetings and there’s almost nothing that can’t be achieved through emails at best, or video calls at worst. I can get away with delegating other staff to take phone calls for me. Trust me,no oneknows. I wouldn’t still be working there if they did.’
‘Yeah, but?—’
He checks his phone again before interrupting me. ‘Look, I appreciate that you care, but we’re not far from the house for the teddy bear, and it’s strange to talk about it. I’m not sure I’ve adjusted to sharing this yet, so can we just…’
He doesn’t finish the sentence but I understand what he means. ‘Leave it for now?’ I suggest, putting a strong emphasis on the ‘for now’ part.
He looks over and gives me that wide, unguarded smile again. ‘You’re consistently tenacious, I’ll give you that.’
I take that as a compliment and give him an expectant look until he laughs. ‘Fine. Fornow.’
18
Once we reach the street where the teddy-wanting little boy and his pyromaniac brother live, I unfurl my scarf and settle it in a complicated tangle that goes over my head and covers my face from the nose down, and Warren watches me with an impressed look, and then bends down to let me do the same with his cape, giving us both a bit of protection from doorbell cameras and nosy neighbours.
We stop to identify the right house, and sneak along in the middle of the road like a pair of burglars, hoping to avoid detection.
‘Can I?’ Warren takes the teddy bear box from me when we reach the right place, and I look for somewhere to hide, but it’s an exposed house with a short path and no fencing or hedging.
