Page 30 of Christmas Ever After
‘Part of what?’
‘Come on, Raff, the obtuse act is wearing thin. Your whole family wholeheartedly believe that your grandfather had magical powers. They think he was Cupid working via the medium of glass-encased glycerin liquid.’
‘You don’t know that he wasn’t.’
‘Yes, I do, and so do you, because magic doesn’t exist, so what is it? What’s making your snow globes move? You can tell me, you know. It’s curiosity more than anything now – I won’t tell anyone.’
His knuckles go white on the steering wheel but he doesn’t react.
‘Something mechanical that causes the base to move when shaken.’ I’m clutching at straws again. It can’t be that because it would happen every time, not just once. ‘A glow stick? Something that catches the light and creates an optical illusion and then… disappears?’
‘A glow stick?’ His eyebrow pings upwards and he glances at me while his hands are still on the wheel. ‘You think I put a magically disappearing glow stick into my snow globes but you don’t believe in actual magic?’
‘I don’t know.’ I twist my fingers around the open zip of my coat. I reallyamclutching at every straw going, but Ican’tfigure out what his trick is, and the more I get to know him, the more it seems like tricks aren’t his style.
He shrugs, keeping his eyes straight ahead. ‘Maybe it’s because peopleexpectthem to move…’
I shift in the car seat and fix him with a withering look. ‘You’re telling me that the entire Dardenne legacy is based on wishful thinking and the power of suggestion? Come off it, Raff!’
‘Maybe it really is magic.’
‘If there was magic in the world, I think it would find something more obvious to channel itself through than snow globes, don’t you?’ I look over at him again. ‘Doyou know how many relationships have broken up? You must have sales records so you know how many snow globes you’ve sold, do you have records of all the couples you or your grandfather had matched and whether they’re still together?’
‘Why would I have data on that? I don’t serve people and say, “Here’s your magical snow globe that’s brought you together – be sure to come back and tell us when you have a horrible and messy break-up!”’
I shouldn’t laugh, but I can’t help myself. He has no right to be as funny as he is, especially when joking about relationships that have gone wrong.
‘It’s not only about matching people, you know. Some customersdocome in solely to buy a snow globe.’ His eyes flick over to me again. ‘Not enough people, mind. Dardenne Snow Globes has got so tangled up in the whole love thing that it’s become all we’re known for. It’s taboo to come into the shop alone, as a single person, because customers think weonlywant to match people up, and on the other hand, people who are already in relationships think it’s no place for them and don’t come in at all. I’ve tried to redirect things since I took over, but our legacy looms large. I’m no longer a snow globe maker – I’m a matchmaker who can’t make a match, and that’s something I never wanted to be.’
There’s such sadness to his words and a real resignation in his voice. I’ve never considered this angle before – that by trying to gain more customers, he’s accidentally ended up alienating some too. And before this week, I’d never considered that Raff himself might be unhappy with how his business is going. I’m probably the wrong person to poke around in this, but Ican’t stop myself. ‘What happens if it’s…notyou who wins in January?’
I hate the thought of this. I would be devastated to lose my shop, but the thought of being responsible for him losinghisshop is heartbreaking too, and it feels like we’re dancing around it, never quite facing it head-on, but sooner or later, we’re going to have to accept that we’re in direct competition with each other.
‘I destroy my family’s hearts and crush their souls.’
I chew on my lip because although it was a sarcastic brush-off of a comment, after meeting them, I don’t think it’s too far from the truth. ‘Seriously, Raff. What would you do? Start up elsewhere?’
We stop as a traffic light turns red, even though there’s no other traffic on the road, and he rolls his head against the headrest to fully face me. ‘Change my last name and emigrate to a new country?’
He’s trying to be funny but it doesn’t sound like a laughing matter, and I give him a pointed stare until he realises he’s going to need to elaborate more than that.
‘I don’t know,’ he says with a sigh. ‘I don’t want to let my family down, but I don’t fit the job that’s expected of me since my granddad died. Sometimes I wish Icouldstart over. Sell snow globes with no myth or legend attached to them. I used to make custom ones that were so special. People would bring in photos for me to recreate in snow globe form. I’d make globes of dearly loved pets who had crossed the rainbow bridge. I once recreated the scene of a proposal as a wedding gift. Specific spots in specific cities. Things that meant something to people. Now I just make bog-standard scenery that people expect to be magical, and if they don’t move?—’
He’s cut off by a car horn honking behind us. The light has turned green and neither of us has noticed. Raff shakes his headto clear it and drives off quickly, but he stays quiet after the interruption.
‘And if they don’t move…?’ I repeat the end of his last sentence, trying to prompt him into continuing it.
‘Then customers are disappointed, and disappointed customers leave bad reviews, and the street I work on wants me evicted, and we end up back at the start of the vicious circle. If I went somewhere else, started up without anyone knowing my name, I could do what we used to do years ago – make snow globes that were magical to people because they meant something, not because of a tacky gimmick.’
A tacky gimmick. If that’s what Raff calls it, does it mean that’s what itis? I could jump on that word, push him for an explanation, but the timing is all wrong. Raff’s opening himself up. I doubt there are many people who have heard this before because there’s no way he’d risk it getting back to his family. ‘Would you do that? Go elsewhere? Leave your family?’
‘No. I don’t know. Maybe? I wouldn’t want to, but…’ He glances over at me again. ‘I can’t see a way forward here. There’s so much bad-feeling towards me from the fellow shopkeepers. Iamdragging you all down with my bad reviews. No one is going to choose me over you. I can’t make those five matches, and even if I could, the problem wouldn’t go away. I can’t do what my granddad did and I can’t get away from what people expect when they see my surname attached to a snow globe. The bullet will need to be bitten sooner or later; I may as well bite it now.’
‘You could rebrand. Drop the love stuff. Your snow globes are absolutely stunning. They deserve to be seen for what they are, not for some gimmick that even you don’t believe in.’
He doesn’t reply, and I don’t push him any further. I pretend to be fascinated by the road in front of us, but really I keep sneaking glances at him from the corner of my eye. Has he always looked this tired? He’s been working extra hours withme, as well as dealing with the running of his own shop alongside Quentin, but I’ve never noticed the dark circles under his eyes and the taut lines around his mouth. His smile is always so big and charismatic that it makes it hard to notice what might be hiding behind it, and it’s probably a good thing I don’t have use of my right hand, because if I did, I’d reach over and rub his thigh in a gesture of reassurance. He’s reassured me since the first moment he came into my shop, but tonight, it feels like he needs a bit of support in return. And the sense of guilt comes again. I’m the cause of part of this. I’m the one who constantly draws attention to his bad reviews. I’m the one who finds fault in everything he does on Christmas Ever After. Maybe he needed to be able to sweep his feelings under the rug for a bit longer. Maybe he needed more time to decide what to do, but I’ve forced the council’s hand and pushed it to be something that has to be facednow, and more than anything, I wish I’d left well alone.
When we pull up outside my house, he turns the engine off but makes no move to get out. ‘Thanks for listening to that. No one else knows. Working on the nutcrackers has reminded me of the joy I used to find in making snow globes, and how much that’s gone away in recent months.’
