Page 112 of Scandalous Contract
And bend me over the table.
“And make you a cup of tea. While you drink it, I’ll listen as you catch me up on what you’ve been up to while we’ve been apart.”
Then you’ll fuck me?
“Then I’ll tell you what I’ve been up to. Some of it, of course. There are some things you’d probably rather not hear about. But if you want, I’ll share those things with you also. I don’t want to hide anything from you, Stefanie.”
That was all fine and dandy, but when would you fuck me?
“What’s that look on your face?” he asked.
Shit.I forgot he could see me. I ceased biting my lower lip.
He chuckled. “You’re wondering when I’d stop all of the talking and bury my tongue in your pussy, aren’t you?”
I wanted to shy away from his words. I wanted to cover my face to hide my blush. But I wouldn’t let him see me getting all worked up because of his words. I hated to admit it, but I wasn’t as experienced as I’d thought, neither in sex nor love. But I’d rather talk sex than love. Sex was less complicated.
So, I smiled and said, “Yes. I seem to recall someone writing that they wanted to taste my soul.”
Silence filled the air. For a second, I thought I’d gone too far. Then his voice filled the room again, all deep and sultry.
“Damn it, Stefanie. I wish you could see me right now.”
I swallowed. “Why?”
“Because I’m hard as fuck just thinking about licking you until I taste your soul.”
I bit my bottom lip, my heart beating faster.
“But this conversation isn’t about me tasting you,” he said. “So, I’m going to ignore my hard-on and focus on what’s important. Helping you work up the courage you need to see beyond our obstacles.”
“I think I’d rather talk about that hard-on,” I whispered.
“You’ll taste it soon, I promise,” he told me.
Damn it, Julian.Now I couldn’t get that image out of my head.
“But my cock isn’t the only part of me that craves you, Stefanie.”
It’s the only part of you I can accept, Julian.
“I don’t want to overwhelm you or pressure you, but I want more with you than just sex.”
“Julian...”
“You feel the same way. I know you do.”
I exhaled slowly. At this point, there was no reason to deny it.
“I do. But that doesn’t mean I can act on it. We can’t always have what we want, Julian.”
There was a pause, then, “Thank you for not denying you want me.”
It was my turn to go silent as I considered how he must’ve felt hearing me reject him before. I hadn’t wanted to. It’s just... I came with baggage. And I wasn’t referring to my child. She wasn’t baggage, she was a blessing.
But I had baggage. A closet full of skeletons. It would be selfish of me to let him into my life and weigh him down with my troubles. That didn’t mean I wasn’t thankful to him for being there for me, even though we were miles apart.
I loved the way he made me feel. He wasn’t even present, and I felt good just knowing he was watching me. But this couldn’t continue. I could not give him what he wanted. I don’t know exactly what he saw when he looked at me, but I was not who he thought I was.
