Page 86 of Her Wicked Knights
"Why are we doing this?"
Why are we doing this? Because it feels good. Because we need it. Because we're drawn to each other in ways that neither of us can explain.
"To fix me." I answer dutifully, giving him exactly what he wants to hear.
"To fix you." He agrees. "Because...?"
"Because I'm broken." I don't hesitate. Even before our relationship turned sexual, he taught me to embrace the shame associated with feeling broken. Being broken doesn't mean I have no value. I'm not a vase. Owning the shame allowed me to control it, and now I can speak the truth without feeling embarrassed when I admit that I'm broken.
"Do you feel like you're healing?"
"Yes."
I'm back in college, even despite someone in class last semester outing me as a 'real life final girl'. I'm pursuing a degree in law, and I'm empowered enough to stand in my therapist's office stark naked, waiting for him to come fuck me. I have my own apartment where I'm current on my bills, I make a little extra cash waiting tables, and I've started to enjoy living again. I'm moving on in the moments where I don't feel like the past iswaiting to swallow me, to drag me back to the void I came from. This is healing, even if it's messy. Even if it isn't what I thought my life would look like ever.
"I'm proud of you." He says, and it startles me enough that my head snaps up to get a look at his face, trying to assess the sincerity of that statement.
"What?"
"I'm proud of you." He smirks. "I didn't say you're all healed. You've done so well, but we've got a long way to go."
I don't get a chance to ask what he means by that, because he grips the back of my neck, pulling me onto my tiptoes as far as the chain will allow me to move. The edges of the desk dig into my hips and ribs, forcing the air out of my lungs. It doesn't matter anyway. He'd have forced it out of me in the next instant anyway when he guides his cock into my throat and rams in deep.
And like he always asks of me, I don't fight it. I gasp around him, focusing on taking breaths when I can, and just taking it when I can't. Just like I always do, I do exactly what he demanded I do from the beginning.
I submit.
39
Tripp
WhenMarleyleft,Ithought maybe she’d be gone for a few weeks. I knew, in the back of my mind, that Whit had something to do with it, but I was naive enough to hope that she would get out from his hold and come back to us.
But weeks turned to months, and months turned to years.
Living without her is hell. Waking up each day to see the house she abandoned reminds me that she abandoned me, that she left me behind in spite of all the promises we made to each other as children. And it's not just me... Colton and Rev are hurt by her, too.
Not having her to share my grief and my triumphs has been torture. I thought, if anything could make her come back, it would be my parents' funeral. My mother was her best friend, after all. She cooked Marley and Hadley casseroles, held her when she cried, even offered to adopt her. My mother did all of that for Marley because she loved her, just like I love her. And Marley couldn't even show up to pay her respects to them.
It was Rev who supported me in my grief, who held me when I broke down, who put me back together when I came apart, whodidn't try to convince me that everything would be okay, unlike my brother. Instead, he let me feel the pain but never let me get lost in it. Because life doesn't stop for anyone. It persists, and because it does, so have I.
A lot can change in two years.
Colton decided to be a police officer, which didn't last long before my brother overthrew the mayor and appointed my best friend as his chief of police. It's been funny, knowing what Colton does in his spare time. Our parents lived to see Axel win the bid for mayor, and though he was by far the more successful son, I know they were proud of me too. I took my graduation gift and bought the pizza shop Marley and I always loved, and it did so well, I bought the tattoo shop as well. Colton's my most loyal customer, and Gina, the girl who I brought on to run things there, is clearly interested in him. She did all my piercings, including the ones I got after my parents died... ones that Rev was shocked to realize were there when we first started hooking up. But he clearly has no complaints about them. We've been together the better part of this past year, which has been terrifying and exhilarating all at the same time.
Losing my parents after Marley and her parents made me realize how few people I have left in my life to love, and that I should stop trying to push Rev away. All he ever wanted was for me to let him in, and I finally did. He let me in, too. We've taken turns, and while I'm more of a bottom, he likes it when I switch things up and surprise him... just like I did last month when I bought the old Winthorpe Estate. He was even more surprised two weeks later when I invited Colton to move in with us, but he didn't object. The place is huge, and Colton's always out anyway. This way, he doesn't have to worry about going home to his narcissist mother at the end of his shifts.
We still meet at the church every few months with Carson, Nick, and Mark. Jake doesn't bother coming around anymore,which is for the best, considering he wasn't really even welcome at the beginning. It's always brief, a way of checking in whether any of us has heard from Marley or Whit.
Whit promised Colton, Rev, and me Marley. He promised that we were fated together, that we would be together because the universe demanded it. He promised Carson, Nick, and Mark her power... the power he's been taking for himself and using to keep them hidden... to keep us trapped here.
None of us have been able to leave town since the day they did. It's clearly some kind of curse, a means of making sure that we don't go looking for them... that we don't find them. Because Whit knows what will happen if we do find him. He knows he's a dead man, if not because of God only knows what he's doing to Marley, but because the others want revenge for his betrayal. He promised them wealth and splendor, riches and magic, power and glory... and he delivered none of that, trapping them here in this town with us. It's the only thing we have in common, now... we're all invested in finding them.
Hadley knows where her sister is now. She's visited a time or two, and I've done everything I can to get her to tell me. Her and Axel have been spending more time together lately, which means she can't avoid me as much as she used to. But I'm not willing to torture the truth out of her, and she says she was sworn not to tell a soul where Marley lives. Not that knowing would do us any good, anyway, since we're all stuck here.
We gather for the usual check-in, everybody confirms that we haven't been in contact with either of them, and then we all go our separate ways. But when the others leave, Rev stops me with a hand on my arm.
"I found something."
