Page 12 of Keep Me Still
And I hope she’s not using zoom because some inappropriate things are happening in my black dress pants. And I’m the bravest son of a bitch alive when Layla leans close to me for each new pose. My fingers skim her bare shoulders, the zipper of her dress, and as I help her into my truck, I chance a hand on her backside just to see where she’ll draw the line. I must’ve done something right in a past life because she doesn’t. Though her cheeks are a little pinker than before when I join her in the cab of my truck.
“Bad news,” I say with a shake of my head. “School burned down. They’re holding the dance at a local hotel. I got us a room.”
For a split-second her eyebrows twitch and I can see theis he seriousin them. But my grin gives it away and she slaps my arm.
“You’re an idiot,” she tells me with a laugh.
“Yeah, but I’m your idiot,” I say without thinking. Her potent peaches and warm honey scent has me intoxicated and unable to control myself or my mouth. To hell with it. It’s not like she doesn’t know. Like everyone doesn’t know.
“Are you?” Her eyes widen. Okay, maybe everyone doesn’t know.
“Layla, seriously? What, you think I skip school to buy milkshakes for just anybody?” I clear my throat because this is going way heavy sooner than I’d planned.
She’s biting her lip and it’s making it hard to concentrate on my driving.
“If you want to make it safely to the dance, please stop doing anything that draws attention to that perfect mouth of yours.” There, now it’s out there. If she didn’t know how I felt before, she sure as hell does now.
Her face is full-on blood-red now, and it turns me on even more knowing that I put that color there. But I am so wrong if I think for one second I’m in control. Layla scoots over, close enough that her side touches mine, and rests her head on my shoulder. She sighs into my ear and I have to stifle a shiver of my own.
“Just so you know,” she says, “I don’tacceptmilkshakes from just anybody.”
I force my throat to swallow as I kiss the top of her head. Yeah, I knew that. And the weight of what she’s really saying presses down on me. I’ll be her first everything. Date, boyfriend, kiss, and however far she’ll let me go. I don’t think I’ve ever been anyone’s first anything before. God, please don’t let me fuck it up.
Before I’ve even finished my silent plea, the Colonel’s face flashes in my mind. Of course I’ll fuck it up—that’s all I’m capable of.
Beinginvisible was safe and I took it for granted. I see that now as Landen and I enter the gym.
Being seen is dangerous. As the eyes of nearly two hundred students watch us walk onto the dance floor, I kind of want to go back. Because I know what they’re all thinking. Why her? Why would the hot new guy, star of both the football and soccer teams, want anything to do with her? I feel like sending a mass text to all of them.Heck if I know. Text me back if you figure it out.
But Landen doesn’t acknowledge any of them. He just pulls me onto the dance floor and wraps his arms around me like we own the place. Either he’s rhythmically challenged or he just doesn’t care, but regardless of the song playing, we sway slowly back and forth, pressed against each other like no one else is even there. Under the crisp coolness of his cologne on his shirt, I can smellhim. Landen smells like fall. Like a warm breeze just before dusk that sends leaves floating free. Breathing in so hard I’m lightheaded, I pull him even closer.
A low noise halfway between a growl and a groan escapes his throat, causing my body to warm to a dangerous degree. My stomach plunges, like I’m leaning over the edge of giant black hole and I just looked down.
Jason Mraz sings about not giving up as I clutch Landen’s neck a little tighter.Kiss me, I think forcefully at him, tilting my chin up to let him know I’m ready now.
For a second I think he’s going to. His face lowers and his hooded stare meets mine. But then he steps back, straightening and pulling away.
His voice is so sharp it startles me. “I’m gonna grab a drink. You want something?”
Um, yeah, I want something.You.“Sure. Punch or Coke or whatever’s over there.” I slink off the dance floor behind him, wondering what in the world just happened. Is he just seriously parched or what?
Lingering on the edge of the dance floor, I watch as he gets two cups of punch and heads back towards me. He’s barely a foot away from the table when Jena Becker steps directly in his path. Give the chick a point for persistence. Her short red one-shouldered dress is two sizes too small but she’s curvy enough to pull it off. She places a perfectly manicured hand on Landen’s arm and I feel like a flabby slug compared her.
I can’t hear them over the blaring Ke$ha song that just came on but I can tell she’s flirting her ass off. Landen’s nodding a lot but he’s focusing more on his punch than the half-naked girl next to him. I can’t help but be a tad pleased about his obvious discomfort.
He finally says something and she sneers in response before stomping off. I’m almost worried about her breaking an ankle the way she punishing those stilettos. Almost.
When Landen finally makes his way back to me, he looks apologetic and maybe a little confused at my stupid grin. “Let me guess? There’s a party after,” I offer, knowing that’s what Alexis and Jena are always hounding him about. Why girls want a guy to get drunk and molest them is beyond me. If the guy doesn’t make an effort sober, anything he does under the influence probably doesn’t mean much.
“Uh, yeah,” Landen stammers, and for the first time he looks at me like maybe he wants to go. A lump threatens to form in my throat and I’m almost relieved that he didn’t kiss me and that we’re still “just friends.” Even if it is just friends complete with air quotes included because we both know it’s more than that. But at least I can give him a chance to back out before any major lines are crossed.
“Well I don’t know what she was so angry about. You can drop me off and swing by the party after, right?”
There. Take your out if you want it.
But it’s hurt and confusion that settle onto Landen’s features. I sip my punch and pretend not to notice.
“Yeah, I could. Or I could tell her to give it a goddamn rest already because my girlfriend isn’t really a party kind of girl.” His words linger in the air and mine don’t come right away. “Hope that’s okay because that’s what I said.” Landen shrugs but I know he’s waiting, leaning over that gaping canyon just like I did earlier.
