Page 61 of Learn the Play
“Go kick some ass,” I tell him.
“You sure you’re all right?”
“I’m fine. I promise.” I smile, hoping to ease his concerns.
“I’ll call you after the game.”
“You don’t have to. I know you’ll be tired, and it’ll be late.”
“I’m not going to bed without telling you goodnight,” he grumbles, and my heart soars.
“Good game.”
“Thanks, Dream Girl.” He blows me a kiss, and the screen goes black.
“He’s a good one,” Mom tells me.
“Did Dad ever do things like that?” I ask her. “Call before a game?”
“He did. When I was pregnant with you, as his career advanced, and as I settled into my role as your mom with my own career, we just kind of drifted. Bellamy, it wasn’t all on your father. I didn’t make the effort either. He was gone a lot, andI just stopped including him in our lives. I’m just as much to blame for our marriage falling apart as he is.”
“All these years,” I whisper, “you never said anything.”
“You got upset anytime I tried. You couldn’t see or feel anything but your anger, but I think your football player has helped you see that it’s not the game, but the situation, and it’s not all on the man, either. I was just as guilty for the demise of our marriage.”
“I feel like the last fifteen years have been a lie,” I confess.
“Oh, honey, I’m sorry. I should have insisted that you sit down and have this conversation. Your dad never wanted me to. He said you’d come around in your own time. With each year that passed, I tried less and less, which again, is on me. I failed you there. I was with you every day. I could see your anger, but I didn’t sit you down to make you understand.”
I glance at Amanda, and she smiles. “He loves you, Bella. I can see it when he looks at you. He was proud as a peacock that day at the stadium, during family day. He was introducing you to everyone, including Reid.” She snickers.
“I like to think life has a way of working out. I think the universe knew you needed a man to show you. That’s the only way you were ever going to work past the anger and resentment.”
My head is spinning. All this time, it wasn’t just him. Why have I never considered that? I know why: I was angry and needed someone to blame. He wasn’t there, so he got all of it. The weight of all the years I’ve lost with my dad because I was too stubborn to see the forest through the trees sits heavily on my chest.
“What’s in the box?” I ask my mom.
She gives me a sad smile and hands it to me. Pulling off the lid, I see lots of envelopes. “What’s this?”
“They’re all from your dad. You refused the first several, so after that, I just put them in this box. I thought maybe one day, you might want to see them.”
Tears burn my eyes, and I try to blink them away, but it’s no use. They fall unchecked, coating my cheeks. Lifting the first envelope, I flip it over. It’s sealed, so I slide my finger underneath and pull out the contents. It’s a birthday card—my thirteenth. A check falls out, for thirteen hundred dollars. “I can’t believe my baby girl is a teenager. I love you so much, my Bella. I hope you have the best birthday. I’d love to see you when you’re ready. Love, Dad,.” I read his note inside the card.
“He loves you so much, Bellamy. After the first birthday, when the check wasn’t cashed, he started wiring me the money, in addition to sending you a check.”
“That’s how we took those trips every year for my birthday?” I ask her.
She nods. “I mean, I make good money as a paralegal, but not that kind of money. You never asked, and I never told you, because anytime I mentioned his name, you got upset and even angrier. That’s on me. I should have made you listen. As your mother, that was my job, and I’m sorry I let you down.”
I want to be mad at her, but honestly, I’m so tired of being angry. I’m in such a good place in my life. I’ve met a man who makes me smile every day. We’re living together and starting a family. I want to swim in happiness and push the sadness away. “I’m so tired of being angry,” I say, choking on my tears.
“Oh, Bellamy.” Mom pulls me into a hug.
“Damn you, Warner women!” Amanda scolds as she sniffs, and we all laugh.
“Leave them here, or take them. Either way, they’re yours.”
“I think… I think I’ll take them with me.”
