Page 40 of Reconnected Hearts
“Don’t apologize,” I chastise gently. “I’m fine.”
Noah smiles, nowhere near his usual charm, but genuinely. He gazes up at me, eyelashes dark against his light skin. A bit of his boyish charm returns. “Yeah, you always are, Little Miss Perfect.”
I playfully roll my eyes. He issoannoying.
I hate that it’s growing on me.
“You just can’t help yourself, can you?” I ask.
Noah’s smile grows into a grin, and he shrugs. “What can I say? Sometimes it’s just too easy.”
I shake my head at his antics, but I know I couldn’t possibly take him seriously, not after everything that’s happened. My ideation of Noah Laurier has changed. Where I once saw an immature boy who finds joy in the humiliation of others, I now see a goofy man doing his best to make himself and everyone else around him just the slightest bit happier, no matter how hard life gets.
I start to tell Noah that despite every argument and disagreement we’ve had, maybe we could’ve been friends in another universe. A universe where we don’t find it all too easy to take advantage of each other. However, before I can, the luggage carousel roars to life and bags begin to slide down onto it. I’m so relieved by the fact that this nightmare of a trip is almost over that I nearly miss the flash of disappointment on Noah’s face. I manage to catch it just in the nick of time, though. I open my mouth to ask what’s wrong, but I’m distracted by my name being called in the distance.
I turn to see a man that I vaguely recognize as my future stepmom’s son, John, quickly approaching with a look of urgency and a thin layer of sweat covering his bony face.
“Lucy!” he exclaims as he reaches us. “We have to go. If we don’t leave now, we won’t make it in time for the ceremony.”
“Shit, it’s that soon?” I hiss, picking up my carry-on and rushing after John to collect my suitcase. Luckily, it’s one of the first ones to rotate by, and I’m able to grab it almost immediately. As soon as it’s in hand, John heads for the exit, and I chase after him without a single thought other than making it in time to be there for my dad. After everything I went through to get here, Ihaveto make it to the wedding.
I’m nearly to the sliding doors when I remember what I’ve forgotten, and it sucks the air right out of my lungs. I turn around and find Noah right where I left him, longingly staring after me. Is this the last time I’ll ever see him? Will my last memory of him be those sad, sad eyes begging me to do something?
“Lucy!” John calls, several paces ahead of me. I brush him off, but I can tell from his visibly growing frustration that I don’t have much time to make a decision.
Life or love? This is my time to choose, and never in a million years did I think that it would be so difficult. My head is screaming,Leave him behind without a second thought. But my heart is begging me to stay, to go be brave for one fucking minute.
I can’t be brave. I must be responsible. I must think of my future and my family and my life. Noah simply doesn’t fit into the equation, even if my thumping heart so desperately wants him to.
I leave him behind without so much as a goodbye.
CHAPTER22
NOAH
Itold myself from the very start that this was going to happen. Lucy and I were going to part ways and likely never see each other again. I just never expected it to be this hard. Watching her walk away was like taking a knife to the gut. Every instinct in me was screaming to run after her, to make her stay for even a second more, but I’ve been selfish enough. I’m not right for her. I know that. I just wish she didn’t feel so right for me. I wish I still hated her. It would be easier then.
The walk from the airport to the hotel is cold. So cold that my skin goes numb. It’s a refreshing change from the unbearable heat I felt every second that I was with Lucy. Or, at least, that’s what I tell myself. I feel alone. More alone than I have in years. Realistically, I know that can’t be true. My companionship has been lacking for a while now but having Lucy there for even just a few short days made me forget just how agonizing solitude can really be.
Every time I turn a corner, I imagine she’ll be there with a teasing smile. She’ll tell me that only I would forget to bring winter clothes to a snowy state. She’ll call me a dumb boy.
She’s never there, though, and I’m still somehow always disappointed.
Checking into the hotel feels like the universe is teasing me. It’s a tiny room with one tiny bed that still manages to feel so uncomfortably large without Lucy’s presence bringing it to life.
She broughtmeto life. It’s as if I’ve been a robot for months, moving on auto-pilot. Work, sleep, repeat. There was never time for laughter, or surprise, or pleasure. Lucy gave me all of that in such a short time, and now I don’t think I can live without it anymore.
I dread my interview. I know I’m signing up for an existence of misery, one that seems so much more dull now than it ever did before. I put on my boring suit and my boring shoes and comb my hair so it sits boringly straight. Lucy would laugh at me. I just know it. She’d call me a corporate drone.
I wish she was here. Ireallywish she was here.
I want to ditch my dumb interview and go find her, just like in the movies. I want to surprise her and sweep her off her feet, and we’ll live happily ever after in a woodland cottage with a bunch of forest animals as our closest companions. The movies aren’t real, though, and that's not realistic. Lucy’s affections aren’t mine to win, and while I’ve been living in weird purgatory make believe land for the last few days, the storybook is over now, and it’s time to go back to real life. That means going to my depressing interview to get this depressing job so I can live my depressing life.
And as much as I hate it, Lucy Marino just isn’t a part of that life.
CHAPTER23
LUCY
