Page 42 of Reconnected Hearts
I don’t want to choose between love and life anymore. I just want to live, and I want to live fully, without fear or hesitation. It’s so exhausting to think and worry every second of every day about things that are completely out of my control. I don’t want to play the game anymore. I don’t want to be Jo or Amy or Meg oranyone. I just want to be me, and I want to make my own decisions and live my own story. And if Noah is a part of that…
Well, the more the merrier.
I check the time. Noah’s interview is set to start in twenty minutes. If I hurry there now, I could make it by the time he gets out.
No, this is crazy. I can’t do this.
“Lucy?” Marta has returned, slowly approaching with a look of concern. “What’s wrong, sweetheart? Why aren’t you joining us?” Her face slowly falls. “You don’t approve, do you? Oh no. I was worried about this. I told your father I should’ve met you long before the wedding, but?—”
“No, Marta,” I stop her and close the space between us. “Trust me, if I didn’t like you, you’d know. I think you’re amazing and you clearly make my dad happy in a way that I never thought he could be. I amsohappy for you. It’s just that…”
“What?”
I sigh and try to fight off the image of Noah’s sweet, goofy grin in my head. “There’s this guy...He’s here, in Providence, but I kind of let him get away. I want to fix it, but now is my only chance and I don’t want to leave you guys, and I’m in this uncomfortable dress, and I wouldn’t know what to say even if I had the guts to go find him, and?—”
“Lucy.” Marta takes my shoulders in her hands and looks me in the eye, smiling that big, bright smile. “Go after him. If you’re meant to find him, you will. If not...we’ll be here waiting with a glass of champagne.”
Just the mere idea of seeing Noah again makes my face split into the kind of smile that physically hurts. I want it—so badly. But I see my father on the dancefloor, watching us with an expectant smile. I can’t leave. I couldn’t possibly do that to him on his special day—even if it is histhirdspecial day.
“No, Marta, I?—”
“Go, Lucy. We aren’t going anywhere, I promise. Just do what you need to do.”
I’m breathless. This is all happening so fast and I’m nowhere near sure that I should be going through with this, but all I know is that I have to try. If I don’t, I think I might regret never knowing what could’ve happened.
“Okay. Alright, I’m going. I’m gonna go.” I collect what’s left of my dwindling courage and dignity, and I pray to whoever may be listening that I’m not making the biggest mistake of my life.
CHAPTER24
NOAH
Stab me in the eye with a ballpoint pen.
I thought it couldn’t possibly be that bad.
It was worse.
I was shoved into a room with a dozen snotty men who looked like they were cloned in a lab. They were even ruder than I imagined, and they definitely whispered the word “hoodlum”to one another at least once. They asked me a bunch of questions that didn’t pertain to the job and judged me when I answered incorrectly. It was an absolute nightmare.
And unfortunately, I still got the job.
So I guess that’s the end of it. I don’t have a choice anymore. The job is my fate. I have to take it, and I have to move away from my family.
I’m going to become a snotty insurance clone. How fun.
I leave the office feeling lower than ever. I’ve gotten everything I wanted, and now, I wish that I could give it all back. This stupid trip has ruined my life. All I’ve gotten is a lot of heartache and a lot of misery. I wish I could go back and never get on that plane to begin with.
I guess the one positive aspect of all of this is the travel points I’m owed for all the delays. Maybe I can take a trip to Hawaii one day, that is if I don’t become a corporate robot. I don’t think corporate robots take many tropical trips.
I leave the lobby with my phone held to my ear.
“Yeah, could I get a large pepperoni and then a side of cheese bread? Oh, and a large soda. Wait, no...a large diet soda. Yeah...That’ll be all.How much? Jesus, alright. I?—”
I freeze mid-step. Mid-sentence. I must be hallucinating.Lucy?
There’s no way she’s here right now, breathless and frazzled.
Lucy?!
