Page 10 of All That Glitters
“The maced part had a lot to do with it,” Tony said.
Matt smirked, nodding toward Jeff. “He’s just pissed because he lost the bet.”
Tony paused. “What bet?”
With a groan, Jeff dug through his pocket and pulled out a ten-dollar bill, which he reluctantly handed to Matt.
“The one that you’d last more than one day,” Jeff said, watching Matt pocket his money.
Matt reached over and patted Tony on the back. “Thanks for being so completely unreliable.”
“Anytime,” Tony said. He turned his attention back to the increasingly depressing job listings.
“So what’d you and Debbie do after graduation?” Matt asked.
“Not much,” Tony said, his eyes still scanning the paper. “Just hung out at the beach.”
“He means, she blew him off again,” Jeff said.
“No,” Tony said, irritation creeping into his voice. “It means we hung out.”
Matt looked at Jeff. “Remember? They’re ‘just friends’.” He inserted the air-quotes with his fingers.
“Lame,” Jeff said, leaning back in his chair.
Matt looked at Tony, who had begrudgingly looked up from the newspaper. “Here’s where you get the lecture about how only scary chicks are friends,” Matt said.
“It’s science!” Jeff said. “If a girl is cool and hot and not secretly a cyborg, some guy has already snapped her up. If she’s just ‘friends’ with a dude, it’s because there’s a fundamental flaw. It’s a well-documented phenomenon.”
Tony let out an exhausted sigh and turned back to the newspaper. “So, what about this telecommunications job? Yay or nay?”
“Dude,” Jeff scoffed. “That was the lamest change of subject I’ve ever heard.”
“Everything else is all retail, or fast food,” Tony said, deliberately ignoring the bait.
Matt glanced at Jeff. “He’s ignoring you.”
“He hears me,” Jeff said, leaning forward. “Dude. So how about this? If you’re not gonna date Debbie, hook me up.”
Tony felt something unexpected tighten in his chest. It felt like something more than simple annoyance, but he wasn’t sure what. “Didn’t you say something about only dating sophisticated girls from now on? Because that’s like the exact opposite of Debbie.”
Jeff dismissed this with a wave of his hand. “That was last week’s standards. I’ve adjusted them this week to reflect changes in market conditions.”
“Meaning, every girl he hit on blew him off,” Matt clarified.
“No,” Jeff said. “Meaning, I’ve seen the importance of lowering my expectations.”
“Hey,” Matt cut in, “I have no standards. Hook me up.”
“He can’t,” Jeff said, “because he’s already hooking me up.”
Tony shifted uneasily. The conversation made him increasingly uncomfortable, though he couldn’t pinpoint a reason why. Debbie was single, they were single — so why didthe idea of her dating them make him want to throw them both into the ocean?
“I’m not hooking anybody up,” Tony said firmly. “For those of you just tuning in, Debbie lives in Phoenix with her parents.”
Tony’s defensive tone didn’t escape Matt and Jeff.
“Phoenix isn’t that far,” Jeff pointed out. “It’s what, like, a four-hour drive?”
