Page 144 of Claimed By the Rival Alpha
She frowned, her head cocking slightly to the side. “Why? He’s in the cells; there’s no way he’s going to see the light of day again.”
I took her hand between mine. “I know that you were hurt and feeling a lot of different emotions at the time of the challenge ceremony, but you weren’t thinking clearly when you made the decision to lock him up. Now, time has passed, and you need to put in the order to have Troy killed.”
She pulled her hand away, bristling. “I was thinking perfectly clearly at the time. And I’m thinking clearly now. I won’t have Troy killed just because I’m afraid of him.”
Shit.Have I already fucked this up?“Bryn, Troy can still be a threat to the pack if he’s left alive. He can send messages through the pack that would turn your people against you. Or, more personally, he could become the reason that you have to look over your shoulder for the rest of your life. Killing him will send everyone a message that you won’t tolerate any disrespect or anyone planning to stage a coup.”
She pushed away from the table, her chair squeaking over the floor. That was how I knew that I’d fucked this up even worse.
When she turned toward me again, her eyes blazed like blue fire. “Ordoing something like that will sour what little good will I’ve fostered in the last few days. I’m not going to be a fucking dictator, Night. I won’t kill everyone who scares me or makes me uncomfortable. I’ve never been a killer, and I refuse to be now. I can’t do this like you would.”
Hurt pumped with anger through my veins as I pushed away from the table and got to my feet. “Is that what you see me as, Bryn? A mindless, killing tyrant like Troy?”
“Of course not! I never said that about you, Night.”
“How the hell else am I supposed to take what you said?”
“I meant—” She cut herself off mid-tirade to close her eyes and take a few deep breaths. When she looked at me again, she was calmer, but still quite serious. “I meant that I wouldn’t run the Kings the same way you would. Troy is in jail for now, and if he becomes a problem, I can deal with that then. Killing him now would do nothing but make people believe that I’m doing it for petty reasons, and I’m on thin enough ice as it is.”
I was still pissed off, but I was starting to understand what she was saying. She agreed that killing Troy would send a message, but that message would interfere with the kind of Alpha she was trying to be. I got that, but sometimes an Alpha had to make tough decisions, even if that meant putting people on his (or her) bad side.
“I think,” she continued, “that killing should be thelastoption, not the only option.”
I shook my head. “The world doesn’t work that way, Bryn. Hesitating to kill could cost you your own life. Sometimes, if you want to protect your pack, you have to decide to kill someone instead of leaving them alive, because letting them live can do more damage in the long run.”
She sighed, crossing her arms over her chest. “That’s your opinion, Night, but I’m the Alpha for now, and I’m not going to start my short reign as a killer.”
“Most every Alpha starts out as a killer, Bryn,” I countered. “The only way to become Alpha is through violence.” I let my eyes slip away from her and lowered my gaze to the ground. “I would know. I had to kill from the time I was sixteen.”
“That was different.”
I sat back in my chair. “I don’t see how.”
“Because, Night, you grew up in that world. It was the only option you were given, and that was a disservice to you. You forget, Night, that I grew up living in a pack without getting to be a part of that pack. It left me isolated and prevented me from forming any relationships I could’ve built, but it also sheltered me from those violent rituals. You grew up having to fight and dealing with a shit Alpha who ran the pack into the ground. I understand why you killed him, and I could never hold that against you.”
It still felt like she was just paying lip service to me, and I couldn’t look at her. I heard her step toward me, and saw her hands enter my field of vision as she touched my wrists.
“Hey, Night,” she touched her lips to my forehead, “you arenothinglike Troy, and I’m so sorry that I made you think that you were. Even when you kidnapped me, I knew you were different, brave, strong.” She kissed me again. “I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with the way you lead your pack, but I can’t be that kind of Alpha, even if it’s what you and others expect from me. If I want to do right by the Kings, I have to do right by me, too. Taking a life, even one as vile as Troy’s, goes against what I believe. And I don’t know if I could live with myself afterward.”
I looked up just as she was leaning forward. Instead of kissing my forehead, this time she kissed my nose, which was a pleasant surprise, even though we were still on opposite sides of this issue.
“What if you had killed him in the arena?” I asked. “Could you have lived with yourself then?”
She frowned as she considered my question. “Maybe. All I can say for sure is that I was raised to grow and cultivate life. That’s the type of Alpha I want to be.”
I sighed. I still didn’t like the fact that Bryn was going to leave Redwolf alive. But after talking with her, I understood that she was too good a soul to order the death of someone else. I realized that it was cruel of me to try and put her in that position, especially when it would hurt her so deeply. For now, I would just need to deal. Troy’s death, I knew, would come soon, and it would come swiftly. Until then, all I could do was keep a very close eye on those who were loyal to him.
I took Bryn’s hands and pulled her close. How could I think that someone with skin as smooth and soft as hers would be willing to end the life of another? “I’m sorry for trying to push you to do something you weren’t comfortable with.”
She gave me a small, warm smile. “It’s okay, I know you’re trying to protect me, and I love you for that.”
“Are you sure you don’t want to keep Troy’s men in cells of their own?”
Was it just me, or did she hesitate a beat too long after that question?
“Bryn?”
“Sorry. Yes, I’m sure. I think doing that would set a bad precedent. Unless they do something that’s actually illegal, I don’t see a reason to keep them locked up.”
