Page 67 of The Billionaire's Kiss
Chapter Thirty
Orla
My body quaked with what I could only assume was shock. “Cara, I’ve got to get out of here.”
“Lilith,” Cara called out to the other barmaid. “Orla’s out for the rest of the night. The bar is yours.” She came to me, wrapping her arm around my shoulders. “Come on, doll. I’ll drive ya home. You’re in no condition to do it yourself.”
“Thank you, Cara.” Iwasa mess.
“I’ll grab our things and meet you at my car.” She let me go, and I began making my way out of there.
Going to the staff parking lot, I prayed that I wouldn’t find either man waiting for me. I hoped I’d been stern enough that they both understood that I was in no condition to deal with either of them.
Getting into Cara’s car, I thought I might cry for a moment. By the time she slid in behind the steering wheel, I’d managed to suck it up. She tossed our things into the backseat, then started the car and took off. “You’ve got a real pickle on your hands, Orla Quinn.”
“I know.” Not that I knew what to do about it.
“Were you and that America guy really that close?”
“I’ve never been closer to a man in my life.” I knew that was the truth. I was confused about a lot of things at the moment, but not about that.
“You were only away for a week,” she reminded me. “You couldn’t have gotten closer to him than you’ve gotten with, say, Killian? You’ve known Killian practically your whole life! You two have been an item since we were in high school.”
“But we’ve never been very close.” Gulping, I tried to force down the knot that had lodged in my throat. “I loved Warner.”
“Phppt!” She made a silly sound. “How in the world do you think you fell in love with a man you only knew for seven days?”
“I don’t know how it happened. But it did.” And I was sure he’d fallen in love with me in that short amount of time too. I’d known it before, and I knew he wouldn’t be in Ireland right now if that weren’t the case.
“But you just had that breakthrough about how you feel about Killian,” she reminded me. She seemed to be exceptionally good at recollecting things I’d told her.
“Yes, but that breakthrough wasn’t that I loved him. It was about trying to take a better look at the connection we share—one that I might’ve been blind to. And the thing is, maybe only Killian has a connection to me, but I don’t have one to him. I don’t feel the same spark that I feel with Warner. I don’t feel any spark with Killian. I never have.”
“I can see why you have sparks with that Warner fella. He’s hot. And he looks rich as sin, too.”
“Heisboth.” I bit my lower lip as I had a brief memory of our sexual escapades. “And he’s the most amazing lover I’ve ever had.”
“To be fair,” she said, “you haven’t had sex with Killian in over a year. How can you be sure thathe’snot the most amazing lover you will ever have unless you give him a shot at showing you?”
I found my hand once again wrapped around the pendent that hung in the space between my breasts, directly over my heart. “I can’t do it, Cara. I can’t bring myself to be with Killian like that. I can’t bring myself to be with anyone like that.”
“Not even Warner?” she asked with one raised brow.
“I’m in shock right now. I can’t feel much of anything.” I didn’t know what I would and wouldn’t do at that point. “I don’t know if I can let myself to do anything with Warner—it’s been six months, and I haven’t been able to get over him. And that after we’d only been together for a week. If I start it all over again, it may take my entire life to get over him. I can’t do that to myself.”
“What if he’s here to ask you to marry and wants to take you back to America with him?” She asked. From her perspective, it was a valid point.
But I knew he wouldn’t even think about doing that. “He knows how I feel about that. I’ve got to be here for my family. And he’s got to be in Austin with his brothers and the resort they own. I don’t know why he thought coming for a visit was a good idea.”
“Well, to be fair, you don’t know why he came.”
Nodding, I knew there were things I had to talk to Warner about. But I knew that I couldn’t trust myself to be alone with him. “I’ve got to build up some sort of wall around my heart before I see him again. I can’t talk to Warner unless I can keep myself from doing something that would hurt me in the end.”
“You have no idea how long he’ll be here, though. How long will ya wait to talk to the man?”
“I have no idea.”Maybe it would be best not to talk to him at all.
“This is just my opinion, and I know I haven’t found the man for me yet, but I’m going to say this to ya anyway as it’s burin’ a hole in my heart not to. You have yet to get over Warner. You still love him; I can hear it in your voice. And the way that man looked at you told me that he loves you too.”
