Page 35 of Dirty Little Secret
Chapter 12
Kane
The overwhelming emotion of Fox and Zandra’s reunion had helped ease my hard-on situation. With all the crying and heartfelt words, keeping a hard-on proved to be impossible.
The day had finally come. Zandra and Fox were together again.
I had to admit that I never saw it coming. I had never really thought that we would see her again.
My emotions had been mixed on that subject before seeing her again. Now, I knew I wanted her to be a part of Fox’s life, and mine. But I had to admit that I didn’t know the woman who now sat next to me.
I had to take things slow. For my son, I had to watch what I did and how much I let Zandra in. That same old lust that I’d always felt was still there, burning a hole in my pants. But I had a kid now. And that kid had to be my number one priority.
She’d accepted the date I’d offered her, so we would finally be getting to know each other on a level we’d had the chance to explore before. It was a great start, and one I hoped would end up with us being close enough to raise our son together.
And screw around, too.
My dick was hard for her. I knew that particular organ would get what it wanted eventually. But I didn’t know about my heart. About what it wanted, or what it would be getting.
For all I knew, Zandra could have some pretty nasty habits that I could never deal with. I already knew that I wasn’t thrilled about what she did for work. With that kind of career, she most likely drank and stayed out late into the night more often than I did. She did work at a bar, after all.
Her lifestyle would prove to get in our way, I knew that already. Were there any other things about our lives that would make us incompatible?
“So, Zandra, are you working at the bar while you’re going to college or in some kind of a program?”
Shaking her head, she ran her hand over Fox’s head as he laid it on her shoulder, looking comfy with her already. “No. I should be honest with you, Kane. I’ve never looked past waitressing. My life has been kind of … empty since I had this one here and had to give him up.”
So she hadn’t been in a good place since she’d had the baby. That also might’ve had something to do with how much of a negative spin her parents had put on the pregnancy, or how they’d taken her away from everyone she’d ever known, then made her give up the child who’d been a part of her for nine months.
Those circumstances could send anyone into a downward spiral. It was no surprise she’d felt a bit stunted after that.
“You should get therapy.” Reaching out, I ran my hand over her other shoulder, the one where Fox wasn’t leaning. “What you’ve gone through isn’t easy. I’ll make sure you get help.”
She blinked at me a few times. “I think I can handle it. And now that I’ve got Fox in my life again, I think I’ll be okay from here on out.”
So she wasn’t great at accepting help. That wouldn’t be easy for me to deal with, stubborn man that I was. “Okay. Well, let’s just take things nice and slow. And if you do feel like some therapy will help you, then don’t hesitate to ask me. I know lots of great therapists, and I don’t mind paying them to take care of you. As a matter of fact, Fox sees one once a month to talk about you.”
Her eyes narrowed at me. “You make him go to therapy?”
“Yup,” Fox answered for me, perking up again. “And I like Doc Parsons. He’s nice, and he and I talk about all kinds of things. I’ve known him pretty much my whole life.”
With Fox’s words, her narrowed eyes had opened back up and she went back to stroking him, running her hand over his back. I noticed that she couldn’t seem to stop touching him, and that made me so happy to see.
“Well, as long as you like doing it, then that’s good.” She looked at me. “As you can imagine, I don’t like it when parents make their kids do things against their will.”
Yes, I could already see that Zandra had been damaged by what her parents had done. Hearing more about how they’d handled the situation, I could only imagine that nothing about her childhood had been easy. Yet she wasn’t willing to get help to begin to mend things within her.
This may not be easy.
Fox laughed as he looked up at her. “Dad makes me do lots of things I don’t want to do. I’ve got to make my own bed even though we have a maid who comes in twice a week. I’ve got to take out the trash, too. And I’ve got to make good grades, or I have to go to after-school tutoring until I bring the grade up. I could go on and on about the things he makes me do.”
Thankfully, she laughed, then tousled his hair. “Yeah, I bet you could. But those sound like good dad things that he should definitely be making you do. I would have to agree with him about those kinds of things.” She looked at the floor. “But he’s the one you should be listening to, Fox, not me. I don’t know if I’m even considered your mother still, legally.”
Though I was thrilled that Fox had his mother in his life, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to change anything legally just yet. “We’ll see how things go, Zandra. I don’t want to rush into anything. At least this is just between you and me. My aunt and uncle no longer have any paperwork tying him to them. He’s mine and mine alone. Well, you know what I mean. On paper he’s mine. Only mine.” I spoke quietly, trying to keep this just between Zandra and me. Unfortunately, Fox had great ears.
But he surprised me by standing up and looking at me with defiance in his eyes. “Dad! She’s my mom. I don’t want to see how things go. I want you to make her my mom for real!”
My kid didn’t get away with throwing tantrums, even if they were about important and valid topics. I stood up and pointed at the chair. “Over there, now.”
