Page 60 of Vengeful Seduction
If only I could stop caring about the bleak sadness I’d seen in his eyes when I’d ordered him out.
There was so much in his past. Maybe I had been expecting too much, to think he would have no issues. His mother had left him. He probably thought I was going to do the same.
The things he’d said to me weren’t okay. I was no pushover and I would not be forced into something I didn’t want to do. I’d done the right thing in letting him know I wouldn’t stand for it, and sending him away so he could think about it was only logical.
Hopefully, he would think quickly.
The truth was, I missed him already. It was ridiculous—he’d only been gone about thirty seconds—but I did. I missed how it was when it was good between us. I missed how warm and comfortable and amazing it could be.
Crying, I fell into a thin sleep, but even as I dozed, I knew I wouldn’t really be able to sleep unless I had David in bed with me. It wasn’t going to be quite right until this, our first major fight, was patched up.
Until then, I just had to comfort myself with my own words to Brent. Every relationship, every marriage, had issues sometimes. It didn’t mean we were over—far from it.
It was a comfort, but only in a very thin, unsatisfying way.
Chapter 18
David
I loved her.
The emotion was right there, right in my heart and mind, as if it had been there the whole time. Perhaps it had. Maybe the fight I’d just had with Kaye had pulled a concealing cloth free to let me look at what I was actually feeling.
It was highly disturbing.
For thirty years, I’d lived without love. Oh, I’d loved my father, and even my grandfather. But I’d never loved a woman—not in any way—until Kaye had strolled into my life and messed everything up.
Well, to be fair, I strolled into her life, and I was the one who had set about getting to know her and plotting to marry her.
Always the saint, that woman. Never the sinner.
I couldn’t stop moving. My whole body felt like it was burning, smothered in embers that would give me no rest. I loved her. I loved my wife—the one thing I had thought impossible when I came into this had happened.
So why was I doing this? Why didn’t I just let the whole plan go?
Brent would mock me mercilessly, but I almost didn’t care. Almost.
God, what was I going to do?
My mind turned first one way, then another. I could give up the plan. I loved Kaye. But love wasn’t enough. Love wasn’t worth billions of dollars.
I couldn’t decide.
The sheets tangled around my legs, and I smoothed them out only to get them all messy again. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t lay still. The guestroom bed was soft and comfortable, but it might as well have been made out of rusty nails and hornets for all the rest I got from it.
I’d been so sure of myself. Pushing Kaye had seemed the logical thing to do, and now here I was, sent to sleep in the guest room. I had pushed too hard, and for the first time, I let myself consider something terrible.
What if I didn’t get either?
I had been expecting to lose her the whole time, but what if I lost her and the money? She obviously wasn’t impressed with me, and when I thought of all the things I’d said to her, I couldn’t even blame her.
Maybe I should go talk to her.
Not because I was going to give in. Nothing of that sort. Just to try to repair things. To take her back off of the defensive. It only made sense, right?
I sat up. This was ridiculous. The whole thing. Yes, I’d pushed a bit too hard, but there was no reason I needed to be fighting with my wife. I would go to her, maybe even apologize, and tell her I was under a lot of stress.
Kaye would understand. She always did. That was just one of many reasons I had fallen in love with her against my will.
